Gender Bias in America

Sitting with my teenage daughter and watching TV one evening I was appalled at what I saw transpire on the screen. In a popular prime-time drama geared toward teens, a high-school girl, married because of an unintended pregnancy, was crying to her adult friend that she was unsure she would be able to handle having a baby, going to school, and working to try to pay their bills so her husband could continue his education on a scholarship. This friend gave the child this advice: "I know it's hard," she said smiling, "but you have to have faith."

There is a popular song on the radio that falls right in line with this ideal called Listen to Your Heart. In this song, no matter what the circumstances of life or relationship ("I don't know where you're going, and I don't know why") the singer emphatically advises "listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye."

There are many other instances of this message in the media, from songs to movies to video games to commercials. Women and girls are shown over and over again that making important life decisions based on emotions instead of sound reason is normal and preferable for our gender. But the bias does not end there. It also reaches into the realm of personal and commercial success.

When a man is ambitious for wealth or power, people look at that man and see motivation, ingenuity, and skill. The opinion is generally one of favor and admiration. However, when a woman is ambitious for these same things she is seen as cold, calculating, and manipulative. The word "bitch" is used freely.

If a man makes decisions based on what his wife or girlfriend chooses for herself, he is seen by society as effeminate or "whipped". When a woman makes decisions based on a male partner's choices, she is rewarded with adjectives such as "loyal" and "devoted". Women are the partners whom society expects to give up education or position in order to have a family. Few men would even consider this idea for themselves.

These gender biases may be the reason why women work a majority of low-skill, low-wage jobs and why it is so difficult to get women politically motivated. It may also account for the under representation of women in corporate America, news organizations, and science. Women as a gender have been taught to fear ambition and personal gain. And even though there are improvements in women's education, they are checked by the fact that many women who hold professional degrees postpone their entry into the workforce for the purposes of child rearing. Some of these women fail to enter the workforce later, but those who do suffer the consequences of outdated skills, no experience and no seniority. They often have to return to school to become competitive.

We know as adults that the worst way to make important decisions is to let emotion over-ride reason, but we continually spoon feed our girls the exact opposite. As parents, we must remind them constantly that although TV and videos and movies are fun to watch, they are nothing but fantasy. They must learn of Aristotle, who taught unfailingly that emotions were never to be trusted in judgment, and Hume, who warned that reason can be the slave of emotions. We must help them to understand that it is our ability to reason that separates humans from animals and without it we are living a life that is never in our control.

We must also give to our girls the strength to reject the popular view of the female role, supportive and care-giving, so that those of us who choose a different road will be comfortable doing so in the face of opposition; those people that would use insults and manipulation to maintain an archaic ideal.

In conclusion, the best way to create an egalitarian society, one in which men and women have the same opportunities for personal growth and success, is to instill in each gender the same values and self-esteem. One gender should not be encouraged to acquiesce to another, nor should strength and ambition be encouraged in one and not both. Boys and girls alike should be taught to use reasoning skills to their advantage and to beware the consequences of decisions made solely by emotions. Gender bias is more subtle today than it was 50 years ago, but it still exists.