General Hospital - Not Just for the Ladies

You may be wondering how it is that a thirtysomething, heavily tattooed, and pierced man could possibly get any joy out of watching a daytime soap opera, but I have to stand up and confess..."My name is John, and I like General Hospital". It all began a few years back, innocently enough. I'm a stay-at-home dad and my wife was a big fan of the show. It was the days before Tivo, and she would ask me to watch on certain days and let her know what was going on with a particualar storyline. I'd always thought of soap operas in general as badly acted, ridiculous storylined, pieces of junk and my initial feelings didn't change much on the first few viewings, bu, before I knew it, I became hooked. Here are three major reasons why just about any man can do the same as me.

1. Scorching hot women....This show is absolutely crammed full of them, all in various stages of undress and all constantly with incredibly heightened libidos. The top of the pile for me is Kelly Monaco (she is the girl that won the first season of Dancing with the stars) who can usually be seen in incredibly skin tight, low cut pants and teeny-tiny tops that barely cover her assets. The downside of all this is that all the men generally walk around topless for a large part of the time but you have to take the bad with the good. When the guys come on the scene, just go grab yourself a beer and wait.

2. Good action scenes....Although the title of the show contains the name of a hospital, very little of the storylines actually take place there. A lot of attention is focused on two of the major characters who just happen to be rival mobster types. You have Sonny Corinthos, ( a name only a soap opera villain could actually have) and his hitman Jason pitted against the equally poorly named Lorenzo Alcazar. These two are constantly at war and it has resulted in some very nice John Woo type slow motion shoot-outs with everyone in the surrounding area getting nailed except the two main combatants. We also very rently had a hostile hostage situation in a local hotel which ended with a massive explosion and one of the main characters dying. I was absolutely stunned that this person was killed off but ended up very relieved as he came back a a ghost that only a couple of the members of his family can see....I smell Daytime Emmy Award coming his way.

3. Watching former 80's sex symbols age very badly.....This has been the part, for me, that has made this show tops over all others. In the past few months we've had two former guys, who were huge hits with the ladies, grace us with their presence. First off it was Corbin Bernsen. His LA Law Good looks have long since gone, along with almost all of his hair, and to top it all off he has a paunch that can only be held in by borrowing William Shatner's girdle. His stay was far too brief and he is now gone, but we still have Rick Springfield who has aged terribly. His skin is so wrinkled, he looks as though someone washed him and left him in the dryer overnight. He plays a doctor, as well as his doppelganger who just happens to be a rock star...what's that smell you ask? Another Daytime Emmy.

So there you have it guys. The next time your wife or girfriend invites you to sit and watch a soap opera with them, make sure it's GH, tune in and enjoy.