Getting Out of an Abusive Relationship

Relationship abuse is a controlling and abusive behavior of the more dominant partner to gain control and power over the other. Abuse may come in many forms like physical abuse, sexual abuse, verbal, psychological, and so on. These kinds of behavior are meant to intimidate and have the other person submit even against their will.

If you are in an abusive relationship, here are some steps to help you get out of the situation.

1. Do not be afraid to ask for help. Many victims are ashamed to admit they are being abused by their partner and suffer from low self-esteem. Talk to family members or close friends and ask for their help and advice.

2. Stop the cycle and remove yourself from the situation as soon as possible. Have the courage to stand up for yourself and let your abuser know you will no longer tolerate this kind of treatment. Stop making excuses for them and think that it your fault. Do not forgive them for what they had done. This will only reinforce the abusive behavior and will be more than likely to be repeated in the future. The level of abuse will also be likely to escalate over time if given the chance. Plan your escape carefully. Find yourself a safe place to stay, somewhere your abuser cannot find or contact you in any way. Remember that you have legal rights. Contact the police if you feel you are in immediate danger. File a restraining order, if necessary.

3. Undergo counseling. It always helps to know you are not the only one in this kind of situation. Join a support group. Studies have shown that participating in a support system has very positive effects on the victim's well-being.

On the other hand, for the family member or friend who may know someone being abused, here is what you can do to help.

1. Ask. Reach out first if the victim cannot take the first step. Your friend may just be secretly waiting for you to give them the opening they need.

2. Support them. Remain judgmental throughout. Reassure them, acknowledge what they are going through, and let them know you are there to help. Commend them for taking that crucial step in breaking the cycle of abuse. Tell them they are doing the right thing.

3. Explain their rights and options. Find out what legal steps they can make to secure themselves from their abuser. If the victim is already at the point where they no longer want to go back home with their partner, help them plan their escape. Arm them with the knowledge and resources they will need. However, do not try to direct their decisions. Whatever the victim decides to do, even if they decide to go back to their abuser, it will be ultimately their choice to make. Let them know that whatever they do decide, they can always count on your help.

Article Resource: Elena Bautista