GIfts for Graduation

Is that really your tiny little baby toddling down the isle for her kindergarten graduation? The one who, only a few months ago, was just cutting her first tooth? How could this have happened?

Or is it your gangly middle schooler, embarrassed to be paired with a girl as he marches awkwardly into the gymnasium to reach out for a diploma that will admit him into the magic world of high school? He's heard stories about how freshmen get hazed by the older students, but figures he can hold his own with them better than most, anyway. You watch him watching Sponge Bob with his little sisters and wonder how this child could possibly be old enough to go to high school. (Once in a while, they can even talk him into joining them for, Hello Kitty.)

Perhaps your graduate is a high school senior, an honor student anxious to get out and prove himself as an adult, but, at the same time, really nervous about facing the world on his own. Where have the last 12 years gone? Will their leaving, leave you with an empty nest or do you still have a few more little birds in the nest before facing that dreaded prospect?

And, finally, you may be looking forward to the college graduation of one of your offspring. A happy day indeed, as they should by now, be prepared for a career that will provide a good living for them and a family, should they choose to have one. But the rejoicing over this graduation also has some tinges of nostalgia. This vibrant young adult standing in front of you in a cap and gown, is the same baby you remember that had that adorable toothless grin; the same one that told her third grade teacher that she was going to be a garbage collector when she grew up so she could get the good stuff out of other peoples garbage cans; the same one who, in the 9^th grade, played sick every Friday to keep from giving an oral report in social studies class; and the same one who only called when something was wrong during her final year in college. It's stressful enough to cause a heart attack-but, here she is-ready to launch out into the world on her own.

A trip down memory lane can be fun, but kind of sad, too. The truth is, our kids are growing up, and that is exactly what they are supposed to do. As parents, whether we like it or not, we do have to adjust to each of the steps our kids take on their way to growing up, and try to be happy that they are doing what they were created to do.

So now, here you are facing a graduation and wondering what kind of gift to give your child for this occasion. You want something a little bit different from the run-of-the mill birthday gift. Graduation, after all, signifies a real transition in one's life. My own preference is to avoid gifts they can run to any department store and buy for themselves and, instead, to give something that they will remember (and perhaps keep) for many years after graduation has come and gone. Here are a few suggestions to get you to thinking.

1. Gift ideas for kindergarten graduates.

Take your graduate and his or her best friend to a ceramic place like Pottery Barn or Brushfire to create something to commemorate their graduation. A plate with each child's name and the date of the graduation should be sufficient. They can decorate their plates with all kinds of designs, leave them for firing, and pick them up all finished a few days later. An item like this may become a lifetime keepsake for a child, and they will always remember the outing as the day they celebrated their kindergarten graduation.
Or, perhaps it is time for a first pet for your kindergarten graduate. Don't just bring home a kitten and say, "Here it is." Check out books from the library and study up, with the child, on what animals make the best pets and what kind of care they need. Make sure the child understands that this is his or her pet, and therefore, his or her responsibility. Let the child help make the final decision in choosing the pet, and have the honor of naming it, no matter how inappropriate the name may sound to you. Connecting the acquisition of one's first pet with graduation from kindergarten will insure that neither event is ever forgotten.

2. Gift ideas for middle school graduates.

Middle school is a time of big change for kids so you need to really check out their current interests before selecting a graduation gift. Otherwise, you may find that they lost interest in the subject of your gift weeks before you present the gift to them. Think about an item that helps them with the maturing process-the process of turning into a teenager. (Groan.)

Their first bus pass is a good idea. You may need to take a few rides with them around town to make sure they know how to use common sense, but the freedom a bus pass will give them to head to the library or the mall on their own, or with friends, will do a lot toward building their confidence to face whatever lies ahead in high school.

Another popular graduation gift for middle schoolers is a summer camp one of the fields they are interested in. Maybe they are really into basketball. Then send them to a weeklong camp where they can hone their skills in that particular sport. Or perhaps, they love math. (Don't we wish?) Believe it or not, there are math camps. If you send them to camp, make it something different from their usual summer camp experience so they can tie it into the idea that graduation is a transition from one phase of life to another and make it easy to remember in later years.

Has your child ever flown in an airplane? If not, maybe you could give him a flight for graduation. It would be an experience that would stick in his mind forever, and something to tell his friends about when he gets back.

Look around your area to see if there are other "experiences" you could give your child. Middle school is the age where kids find it difficult to sit still so active experiences are best. Our area has a river noted for its rapids, and guides offer trips down the rapids. How exciting for a young boy or girl, and something they would enjoy telling their own children about many years from now.

3. Gift ideas for high school graduates.

High school graduates have a lot of ideas about what they want for graduation and usually aren't shy about letting you know what they are. If you can afford what they tell you they want, and you think it is reasonable, go ahead and get it, but the gifts that fall into this category often become obsolete in a short time and are quickly forgotten. A laptop computer may be a great gift if your student is going on to college, but, as it will be outdated in a short time, it may not be the gift you want your children to associate with their high school graduation. Maybe the laptop can be considered as part of the cost of sending a child to college, and you can still get them a graduation gift that will have more lasting meaning to your child.

Top on my list is a copy of Dale Carnegie's, How To Win Friends and Influence People.

Well, maybe not for the entire graduation gift, but it wouldn't hurt to tuck it in with whatever you decide to give the graduate. It is a wonderful book and, if even a small part of the advice in it is heeded, the chances of your child succeeding in life will be greatly improved.

How about a cruise for your graduate? Not a real, thousands of dollars type cruise, but a mini-cruise. In Oregon, where I live, there are cruises up and down the Columbia River that run as lower than $50. On the Mississippi River, there are wonderful old steamer and paddle boat cruises, some only lasting a few hours and others for several days. Prices run accordingly. Check out the links provided with this article for more information.
If your child is close to extended family members, try throwing a family reunion party to honor his or her graduation. I have heard of families renting a huge houseboat on Shasta Lake in California for such reunions, but a cabin or two at the beach or a local lake would fill the bill. Your graduate would always remember that the whole family turned out to celebrate his big day.

4. Gift ideas for the college graduate.

College graduates have usually already started the process of breaking away from the family a bit, but that doesn't mean that you need to let them go without a good-bye gift designed to help them hang onto the idea that a person's family is always going to be there for them.

Spend some time ahead of graduation day putting together a memory book for him. Include pictures from babyhood right up through the present time. Intersperse comments from different family members that include memories they have of the graduate at different age levels. You might include a regular "family" album containing selected family pictures to present along with the memory book.

Make a pictorial disc of family events that your student can pop into his computer or disc player whenever he gets lonely to remind himself that there is a family out there that still cares about him.

Depending on your financial situation, and on your student's ability to make regular payments, offer to make a down payment on something he has expressed a desire to buy. A computer, a car, a piano, a trip, etc.

If your student has trained for a particular career and expensive tools will be needed for him to actually pursue work in that area, purchase some or all of the tools to help him get started in his new job.

Finally, if all else fails, give your college graduate cash. Younger graduates are less likely to see cash as something special, especially if they are used to receiving an allowance from you, while college graduates have matured a great deal and understand that your gift is not just cash, but is a helping had to assist them in obtain- ing a specific goal.

The ideas I have listed above are not meant to fit every graduate, or even most of them. They are given to help you think before you jump in and buy the latest fad as a gift for your graduate when you could pick something that will have much more lasting value in their lives as they continue on their road to becoming mature adults.