Girl Fights: In the News, Once Again

Welcome to the new spectator sport: girl fights. It seems there's been a recent spate of student fights caught on video and posted to the YouTube website, 2 of the most recent having occurred at a school near me in Harrisburg, PA. Fights in the schoolyard are certainly nothing new; but the advent of new technology such as Twitter and cellphone cameras has upped the ante. Rather than intervene or call for help, spectators are now more inclined to simply whip out their phone and try to capture some video. What's the cachet? They don't get paid for it; apparently, it's just the attention they get via "hits" and comments on their posted video.

More importantly, at least two of the incidents have garnered negative comments about teachers who "don't get involved enough". Even though they called for help, made limited efforts to separate the girls, and remained on the scene to monitor the situation, they came in for quite a bit of negative commentary.

Just for the record, the PSEU (Pennsylvania State Education Association), as well as most school systems, recommend that teachers not get in the middle of violent altercations between students, and certainly not if they are the only adult present. The teacher risks injury to himself; is not able to monitor the rest of the students at the same time; may incite other students to get involved; and risks a lawsuit down the road if he causes some injury to one of the students by using too much force, improper restraining methods, etc. These fights can become vicious; the best strategy is to call for help, send a student for help as well (the adult needs to stay on the scene), and try to disperse, by verbal means, the crowd of students and onlookers that generally forms. It may not sound like much, but there are plenty of educators out there who have suffered injuries, from concussions to stab wounds, while trying to break up a fight.

When I asked a teenager (the daughter of a friend) about the girl fighting video, she said that it was very popular at her school; in fact, there are several girl fight videos available on other sites besides YouTube. The general consensus seemed to be that "girl fights are funnier because they (girls) pull hair and scratch and spit and stuff. And most of it is over stupid stuff like guys or name calling."

This is borne out by several articles available through online sites. In "Girls Are Worse: Ghetto Girls, Tomboys, and the Meaning Of Girl Fights", (Waldron, Linda. Paper presented at the annual meeting of the American Sociological Association, Montreal, Quebec, Canada Aug. 10, 2006) the author recounts several interviews with high school students and peer mediators. A prime catalyst among girls seems to be the age old story of bullying, enhanced by today's technology. Like many students, I came in for my share of bullying in school, but at least it didn't follow me twenty four hours a day, and nasty remarks about me weren't broadcast to the entire world via the Internet. I think this sort of hounding can very quickly drive a teen into the physical aggression realm; living in constant fear and anger, most people are bound to explode at some point.

Professor Kerry Carrington's Offending Youth: Crime, Sex and Justice,( Federation Press, Sydney, 2009), also touches on cyber-bullying, as well as other social factors contributing to the increase in girl fights and physical aggression. "Increases in violence began when girls began moving into drug and street cultures in the 1980's, but the most significant increase in violence was in the past decade."

I'm not an expert on this issue by any stretch of the imagination, but I can weigh in by comparing what I see in the schools today, compared with my own experiences in high school in the late 1970s. I think there has definitely been an increase in the acceptability of girls engaging in physical altercations among peers. When I was growing up, girls who fought, or were viewed as "tough", were looked down upon with disgust. Now it often seems to be a badge of honor. I'm not sure if this is due to the fact that there are more images of women using physical violence in the media (the movie "Kill Bill: Volume 1" comes to mind), or the fact that there are so many violent games available, or simply the movement of women into less submissive and more dominant and aggressive gender roles.

How to solve the problem is a quandary for both school administrations and parents. Most schools have policies in force which discourage bullying and suspend or expel students for fighting, depending on the severity of the conflict. Educators are having to step up efforts to monitor student behavior and conflict; some schools have resorted to having police "resource officers" on the grounds to respond to incidents of fighting as well as monitoring student activity of all sorts.

What can we do as educators? First of all, we need to be aware of subtle cues that can indicate a problem brewing. We need to keep our ears to the ground, listening for the whispers, snickers, and snide remarks that students use to single each other out. Pay attention to rumors of trouble; watch for unusually large groups collecting in hallways and outside, on the school grounds; and monitor cellphone activity. Hopefully, students are not permitted to use cellphones in the classroom. If you detect a student who is constantly being picked on, take action, either by addressing the student directly (if you feel you have a good rapport with the student), referring them to a peer counseling or peer mediation group, or consulting with the school guidance counselor on appropriate action. Address instigators in your classroom immediately; calling attention to them lets them know that you are aware of what is going on. Many fights and assaults are planned ahead of time, so "blowing their cover" may stop it in its tracks. Make respect the number one priority in your classroom; don't shame students, but make it clear that abusive, combative behavior is not funny, not "cool", and not entertaining. Assault is a crime; do they really want to be a participant by cheering on a fight, or by filming it?

What can the media do? Well, it would be nice if websites could police themselves and institute a policy of taking down any videos which feature violence involving minors.

What can we do as parents? Aside from teaching respect and basic principles of good behavior, we also need to teach our children how to cope with bullying, how to redirect anger into more acceptable channels, and the proper uses of technology. Make it clear that if they use their cellphone for taking inappropriate images or for bullying, you will take it away. Period. Parents seem unable to set parameters for cellphone use these days, despite the fact that they are paying the bills. A cellphone is not a right, it is a privilege, which can and should be revoked if necessary. The same goes for the computer.

Realize that your precious little girls may indeed be capable of nastiness and physical aggression. Teach them that being strong and empowered women does not mean intimidating or demoralizing others to get their own way. Get them involved in sports, faith-based organizations, or other social activities which place a premium on teamwork and values. Listen to them when they're together in the carpool or staying overnight at your house; do they spend most of their time talking about other girls in a negative manner? If so, you might want to think about stepping into the conversation or redirecting them. Contrary to popular opinion, teens do value their parents' opinions, and they want your approval. Your child also needs to know when and how to ask for help, and how to avoid conflict. You simply must try and get it through their heads that they need to walk away from someone who is confronting them. Name calling and face pulling can escalate very quickly into face slapping and hair pulling; I've seen it happen. It is incredibly difficult, even as adults, to ignore that sort of behavior and walk away; and yet, that is the first line of defense. Explain that once they get involved, they will experience the same repercussions as the offender. My son was once confronted by another teenager at a mall; the boy taunted him first, then shoved him. My son shoved back, and soon they were involved in a scuffle. Both were charged with causing a public disturbance, fined, and banned from the mall. My son could not understand why he was punished. "He started it!" That may very well be, but he had the chance to walk away and did not; therefore, he was charged.

It may just be my perception, but violence seems to be on the upswing as a form of entertainment, and that's bound to influence our children as well. There just is no one, easy answer to it all. I wish there were; maybe we all need to go back to Kindergarten rules. Share; use nice words; keep hands and feet to yourself; stop and think; make good choices; use your indoor voice. It seems pretty simple, doesn't it?