Girls' Guide to Terminator: Salvation

After directing a series of hit comedies like the Charlie's Angels films, and Chuck, what does director McG (Joseph McGinty Nichol ) do with one of the summer's biggest, darkest action flicks? If you want the dirt on what you're really looking for, keep reading. Sex, Romance, Drama? Do they tug at your heart strings? Who loses their shirts? Who do we get to see in the buff?

Sex
Sorry gals, but there are no hot 'n heavy sex scenes in this one. The closest they come are a couple of kisses between Marcus (Sam Worthington) and supporting actresses.

Oh, but I mentioned nudity, didn't I? They spared no effort in creating a very detailed recreation of a young Arnold Schwarzenegger as a completely unclothed T-800 (played by Ronald Kickinger) chasing John Connor (Christian Bale), Marcus Wright, and Kyle Reese (Anton Yelchin) around Cyberdine Systems. They used copious amounts of shadows to hide the X-rated bits, but certainly weren't shy with the close ups.

Romance
Marcus and a Resistance soldier by the name of Blair Williams (Moon Bloodgood) develop quite a bond after he saves her from a rowdy group of would-be rapists. They share a tender moment or three throughout the film, but I do mean "moment."

I don't know if I'd call it romance but, alas, John has a leading lady. You wouldn't know they were more than coworkers if it weren't for a hug, her pregnant belly, and some blatant shots of their wedding rings, though.

Friendship
There apparently isn't room for deep friendship when people are always getting killed around you. Several of the characters develop a sense of duty to one another, but there is no real trust or kinship between them. Even in shows of loyalty, they seem a little nervous that their friends may change their minds and shoot at any time.

Family
Loyalty to family boils down to loyalty to self in this film. John Connor risks everything to save the boy that will eventually become his father. (There's some time travel involved. You at least need to see the first Terminator movie before this one.) He states early on that "no Kyle Reese means no John Connor" though.

Humor
If you're familiar with the other Terminator movies, there are a few moments of levity awaiting you in this film. If not, I doubt you'll find any. There are several nods to the older movies. They are kind of groaners, but they aptly lighten the mood.

Strong Female Characters
We certainly have those. Blair is at least as capable a Resistance soldier as her male counterparts, and honorable to boot. Even Kyle's adorable young charge, Star (Jadagrace), shows remarkable courage under pressure.

Clothes
This isn't the kind of post-apocalyptic earth where everyone runs around wearing designer rags. They mostly just wear regular rags. Marcus did look so good in his Resistance trench coat that trench coats may just come back into style. Other than that, I have to say the main goal did seem to be authenticity.

If you're looking for an edge of your seat action flick, this is definitely the movie for you. If you don't like gritty wartime violence, a movie full of characters that clearly need a shower, and plenty of scenes that make you cringe in empathetic pain - - - you really don't want to see this movie. Just wait a couple weeks and watch the naked T-800 on YouTube instead.