God's Guidelines on Sexuality

We will begin our studies regarding God's Guidelines On Human Sexuality with a relatively tame topic, yet it is one that has caused some controversy within the Church.

Celibacy is defined as (1) "the state of being unmarried, especially one under a vow not to marry" or (2) "complete sexual abstinence."

Some denominations advocate celibacy among their clergy. It is a common practice for priests, monks and nuns to take a vow of celibacy with the belief that this will better enable them to focus their attention and energy into more fully serving God.

This belief was founded upon some of the advice that Paul gave to the church at Corinth. Bear in mind that celibacy was advocated as a means to live a life more fully devoted to serving God, but this advice was never intended by Paul to be interpreted as a command-ment from God.

The Apostle Paul said in 1 Corinthians 7:1, "it is good for a man to not touch a woman." This clearly was not a commandment. Scripture did not read, "Thou shall not touch a woman." It was simply mentioning that it is something that would be good, if a man were able to be celibate. However, in verses 2 & 3 of this same chapter, Paul says, "But because of immoralities, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise, the wife to her husband."

God created both man and woman to have sexual desires. God also knew that for most of us, those desires can lead us into sin. So unless we have either superior control over our sexual desires, a sinless outlet in which we could fulfill our needs or were given the gift of celibacy, God (and the Apostle Paul) knew that immorality was a very likely possibility in a Christian's life. Immorality is still a huge stumbling block within the Christian community today, even among those who are married to spouses that are loved and respected very much.

Paul does say, "each man has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that." (vs. 7) So if one does not have self-control, and many of us do not, then the Bible advises marriage. 1 Cor. 7:9 says, "But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn." Paul said this because he wanted Christ's followers to be protected against sinful behavior arising from unfulfilled sexual urges. Marriage is not a guarantee that immorality will be a sin that one is no longer at risk for but it definitely lowers the risk that a committed Christian will be easily entrapped by that risk.

The Bible also says in 1 Cor. 7:32-35, "But I want you to be free from concern. One who is unmarried is concerned about things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord; but the one who is married is concerned about the things of this world, how he may please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the woman who is unmarried, and the virgin, is concerned about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit; but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how she may please her husband. And I say this for your own benefit; not to put a restraint upon you, but to promote what is seemly, and to secure undistracted devotion to the Lord."

To break this all down into layman's terms, the Bible teaches that Celibacy as a lifestyle can be a gift, but that not every believer is called to be celibate. (Not every believer has the gift of prophecy, teaching, discernment, etc. and not every believer has the same gift of celibacy.)

If one is not able to maintain self-control of their sexual urges, than it is better for them to marry rather than burn with passion and be tempted to sin. The Bible teaches that unmarried persons do not get as distracted by other people in their lives as married people can and are thus assumedly better able to devote their primary focus on things of God.

Bear in mind that this last statement is a generalization and that there are always some people who will fall outside the bounds of such generalizations. It is not intended as a slur against the devotion married people have for God. Many times in today's pervasively sinful society, wherein we are taught from early ages to be pleasure-seekers, it would appear that married couples actually are in a much more grounded relationship with the Lord than unmarried Christians are. Being married and rearing a family can help one to become more relationship oriented in the way one views life choices.

Marriage and Monogamy

Since the sexual revolution of the 1960's, the world's view on what is and is not moral sexual behavior has become increasingly more liberal. However, just because our society's moral standards have become lax, that does not mean that those standards are in line with God's standards. Those of us who recognize Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior must ask ourselves "What guidelines has God set forth regarding the sexual behaviors of His people?"

As a Christian, I know that my greatest source of reference for learning the answer to just about any question I may have in deciding my life's path is God's Word, the Holy Bible. Because I believe that the Bible is truly the inspired Word of God, I know that this is where I can go to discover accurate answers to this question regarding human sexuality. If the Bible were merely another book composed by man, it would not have the authoritative element of truth to influence my decisions and I would not be willing to abide by the precepts taught within its pages. However, having accepted Jesus as my Savior and making Him the Lord of my life, the Holy Spirit enables me to accept God's Word as law and assists me in living in accordance with the teachings found within the Bible.

In the first book of Scripture (Genesis), we can see that God created the heavens and earth and all creeping, crawling, walking, swimming and flying things living upon it (Gen. 1:20-25). Genesis does not specify that God created these living things only in pairs of one male and one female. He may or may not have done so. However, we do know that He created them with the ability to procreate. And we also know that He was very specific in telling Noah to take the creatures of the earth into the ark in numbers that included both male and female(s) of each kind.

These other life forms are not held to the same moral standards that God placed upon mankind because they are not made in God's image. Thus when the sexual behaviors of animals are used as an example to try to convince us that it is "normal" or "acceptable" for human beings to engage in sexual behaviors that mimic animal behaviors, it is important that we stand on what God tells us is moral, rather than what our current culture advocates. Cultures change but God is steadfast and His truth endures forever.

What we do know from God's Word is that He did create mankind to also reproduce. Furthermore, we read in Genesis that God created only one pair of human beings (Gen. 2:7, Gen. 2:22-23) and encouraged sexual relations between them by saying to them in Gen.1:28, "And God blessed them; and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth ........" Based on the fact that God created only one man and one woman rather than one man and two or three women or vice versa, it is clear that God intended sexual monogamy for humanity. In Genesis 1:27 we read, "And God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."

We are held to a much higher moral standard than other living creatures that were not created in the image of God because we were made in God's image and we were given explicit instructions from the word of God regarding how we were to express and enjoy our sexual nature (Rom. 13:13).

Nowhere in Scripture does God give commandments to His other creatures, that He also created with sexual urges and reproductive instincts. God set man apart from animals. He did not make us equal to them but elevated our position to put us above them. As such, His expectation is that we to adhere to a higher standard than they do. It bears repeating. Man was made in God's image; no other created thing was!

Further evidence of His intentions can be found in Gen. 2:24 wherein God says, "For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed." God used the word "wife" in Scripture to depict one mate rather than the word "wives," which might have encouraged multiple partners. God's plan for mankind was that they were to dwell within the boundaries of monogamous marriages.

The statement in Genesis that says that the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed shows us that God approved of this intimacy between a husband and his wife. Nowhere in the beginning did God instruct the man and the woman to cover their nakedness.

After Adam & Eve had sinned, they were ashamed of their nakedness. This shame was a result of their disobedience to their Almighty Creator. God had created them to feel perfectly comfortable and natural with one another (and Him), without a need to hide their bodies from one another's gaze. But just as children experience feelings of shame when they commit deeds that they know their earthly parents disapprove of, so too did the first of God's children suffer the consequence of shame when they disobeyed their heavenly Father.

However, in spite of that first couple's loss of the naturalness of their nudity, it is still God's intention that a husband and a wife feel unashamed of their bodies with one another and that this intimacy be strictly confined to only each other. God did not and does not intend that our nakedness (sexuality) be shared with anyone other than our own spouse.

Christians are firmly admonished to not engage in adulterous affairs throughout both the Old and New Testaments of the Bible. In Exodus 20:14, the 7^th Commandment (God's Ten Commandments) is read as follows: "You shall not commit adultery." In Leviticus 20:10 it is forbidden even more firmly. "If there is a man who commits adultery with another man's wife, one who commits adultery with his friend's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death."

Jesus told the rich young ruler in Luke 18:20, "You know the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not murder, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness......." God views adultery as a very offensive act, just as He does murder, stealing or lying about others." Unfortunately, adultery is almost commonplace in secular society today and has infiltrated the Church community as well. However, according to God's perspective, adultery is nothing to just wink at or turn a blind eye to. It is a very serious transgression.

God is so opposed to adultery that Jesus states in Matt. 5:27, 28 that "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery'; but I say to you, that everyone who looks on a woman to lust for her has committed adultery with her already in his heart." So not only does God condemn the physical sexual joining but He also condemns the mental fantasy of a sexual encounter (when the fantasy is a deliberate indulgence or act of one's will and is about someone other than a spouse). This defines God's will regarding the forbidden sexual union between a man and woman who are married (one or both) but not to one another.

The Bible is clear that God ordained marriage as a proper outlet for our sexual urges in 1 Corinthians 7:1-3. These Scriptures tell us, "Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. But because of immoralities, let each man have his own wife, and each woman have her own husband. Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband." Note that again, God is encouraging husband and wives to fulfill one another's sexual needs.

God does not want us to engage in sexual relations with anyone except our own spouses. Further proof of this is in verse 5 of that same chapter. The Scripture warns couples to "Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again lest Satan tempt you because of your lack of self-control."

This teaching is important because it defines the boundaries of marriage as the venue in which God finds it acceptable for mankind to engage in sexual relations with one another and warns husbands and wives of the dangers of depriving one another sexually. God created us. He knows our sexual needs. He knows our sexual weaknesses. He has made a good provision for us by establishing a way for us to indulge in sexual pleasure and to be fully satisfied within the confines of a marital relationship.

Hebrews 13:4 warns all of us regarding sexual immorality. "Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge." Is God trying to throw a damp towel on our opportunities to "have fun?"

Not at all! He is doing what any good Father would do. He is protecting His children from the potential harm that can befall those who engage in immoral behaviors.

The monogamous marriage protects us from both the physical and emotional harm that those who do not practice monogamy often suffer. The consequences for indulging in sexual relations outside of the marriage bed can range from sexually transmitted diseases to unwanted pregnancies to feelings of betrayal and/or self-loathing to broken homes.

There are so many complex consequences for adulterous behavior that it is very difficult to list them all. Suffice to say that marital sexual monogamy is comparable to a health insurance plan. It helps prevent STD's, unwanted pregnancy, and the mental health concerns that sexual infidelity causes such as emotional stress, grief, anger management, etc.

Marital monogamy offers couples a firmer financial foundation for their lives as well.

Non-monogamous couples are more easily divided. A lack of monogamy results in a higher risk of the couple splitting up. Broken homes often equal lower income standards for both spouses. Child support payments and/or spousal maintenance payments drain the financial resources of one party but are usually insufficient to sustain an adequate income level for the recipient spouse and children. Broken homes often result in the loss of real and/or personal property to one or both parties. It is in our best interest and society's as a whole, to adhere to God's plan for a monogamous marriage between a man and a woman.Although there are many instances in the Bible, particularly in Old Testament times,

wherein men had multiple wives or multiple wives plus concubines, but not one of these instances shows that God was pleased by the choices these men made. In fact, it was not unusual for polygamy to result in some unpleasant consequences for those who practiced it.

In 1 Kings, we read about King Solomon, who was a man of the Lord and who had been blessed abundantly for his worship of God. But King Solomon's love for women over-

came his love for God. In Chapter 11:1 we read, "Now King Solomon loved many foreign women...." In verse 3, scripture says "And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines, and his wives turned his heart away." In verse 6, the story continues. "And Solomon did what was evil in the sight of the Lord, and did not follow the Lord fully, as David his father had done."

In verses 9 and 11, we can see the judgment of God upon Solomon for his lusts. "Now the Lord was angry with Solomon because his heart was turned away from the Lord ......... So the Lord said to Solomon, Because you have done this, and you have not kept my covenant and my statutes, which I have commanded you, I will surely tear the kingdom from you and will give it to your servant."

Earlier in Scripture, God had warned King Solomon about taking these women as wives. He knew that Solomon risked being drawn away from serving Him and into idolatry and other areas of sin. Solomon chose to ignore God's warnings. Although he knew that God was looking out for his welfare, his flesh overcame his willingness to serve God. Instead, he gave in to the passions of his own fleshly desires and disregarded his heavenly

Father's counsel. The result was that God became really angry with King Solomon, who was once a beloved, faithful servant of His.

Because of King Solomon's lust for women, he was led astray from God and therefore brought God's wrath down upon himself. His choice to sin had some pretty serious consequences. Likewise, when we choose to exercise our own will over God's will, we also invite serious consequences.

Fornication; Sex Outside Marital Boundaries

About now, some of you are probably thinking that this all sounds fine and dandy to have rules regarding the sexual behavior of married couples but that none of these rules apply to those who are not married. After all, we now live in an "enlightened age," don't we? Things such as chastity and purity aren't really all that important anymore, are they? Aren't these just out-dated, old-fashioned ideas that belong to our grandparents' era? Modern society rarely uses the word "fornication" so surely it is an old-fashioned concept, right?

My answer to you is that many people, believing that they are now living in an enlightened age of sexual freedom, deceive themselves into justifying the satisfaction of their passions. These unfortunate people are not "free" at all. Instead, they are held in

slavery by the desires of their own sexual needs and by society's projection that sexual sin is acceptable and normal. Some people, although they are uncomfortable with the idea of engaging in such casual intimacy, are taken captive by another person's expect-ation of sexual favors in exchange for companionship, meals, gifts, etc.

God's guidelines lead to freedom; freedom from sexually transmitted disease, unwanted pregnancy & the traumatic decisions that would need to be made regarding such pregnancy (ie. keep the child & rear it in potential poverty, give the child up for adoption, terminate the pregnancy, which then creates another moral dilemma!). By knowing and standing firm on God's standards of morality, we gain freedom from being pressured into participating in a sexual experience or relationship that we do not desire, are not ready to emotionally cope with and that is not sanctioned by our God. Our decision to do what is pleasing to God above what is pleasing to self or others gives us the freedom to say, "No" and stand on that decision.

Please do not be naive about this. All sexual encounters, consensual or otherwise will result in some form of emotional impact on the participants. When such encounters occur outside the will of God, much of impact will be negative. This is particularly true for women but men are not exempt from the emotional trauma in spite of society's attempts to project the predatory male as "hot." Men know right from wrong and they inherently sense that sexual conquests pale in comparison to the sexual satisfaction experienced between committed partners who have taken the time to learn what brings optimum pleasure to one another. Men and women both feel more secure in a committed relationship that is mutually monogamous, regardless of how our society attempts to pervert the intentions of our wise Creator.

Sexual pleasure is fleeting but the emotional baggage remains long after these casual encounters have ended. Promiscuity often has a devastating impact on not only those involved in the sexual activity but also on other people close to them. Therefore God, who knows all things and loves us with a perfect love, has provided sexual boundaries to protect us from damaging consequences and to actually enhance our sexual pleasure and satisfaction. It is our choice whether or not to conduct ourselves within the perimeters of His will for us, but when we do choose to disregard His guidelines, we have no one to blame but ourselves for the consequences that befall us afterwards.

Society's code of morality may fluctuate as the generations pass, but God never changes. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow (Heb.13:8) (Mal.3:6) (Jas1:17). His standards do not waver with popular opinion nor are His standards designed to cheat

any of us out of pleasure. Statistically, history has proven that those who do adhere to the guidelines that God has set forth regarding sexual boundaries (even when they haven't done so based on faith), have been protected from the consequences often suffered by those people who have chosen to follow their own paths.

The one fact that cannot be disputed is that there are Scriptural guidelines for sexual activity concerning those people who are unmarried. Regardless of our church affiliation, as Christians we are called to recognize God's authority over every area of our lives, including this one. God's will for unmarried persons is that they remain chaste, practice self-control, and avoid promiscuity. I Peter 3:2 tells us that we are to conduct ourselves in such a way that others will observe our chaste and respectful behavior. We are told in Galatians 5:22 that "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, good-ness, gentleness, self-control;...." The apostle Paul is telling those who serve God that they will master their flesh and control those things not pleasing to Him and that God will enable them to do so by the power of the Holy Spirit. Paul gives further instructions to Christians in Romans 13:13, saying "Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing or drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, ......."

Promiscuity can be a symptom of low self-esteem but it can also be a causativefactor in developing a poor view of self as well. Young people are particularly at risk for this happening because they have not fully come to a clear understanding of the person they will ultimately mature into. Many young people falsely believe that it is flattering to be considered "desirable" by members of the opposite sex, but they fail to consider that

it is not really much of a compliment when the object of one's desirability is one's genitals! I would encourage each of you to make a mental list of the things that you value about who you are as a human being and then compare the things on that list to your body parts. Wouldn't you rather be valued for virtues such as kindness, generosity, good will, humor, intelligence, gentleness, etc.? Think about it if you haven't already done so. I think that you will discover that deep inside you is the longing for validity that has little or nothing to do with sexual performance. We all have a built-in need to be genuinely valued; promiscuity does not foster value. Anyone can provide a sexual outlet for another person; doing so does not make one valuable. It just means that they are a warm, willing body with which to swap body fluids. Maybe just one step above inflatable dates?

However, the worst consequence of indulging in sexual activity that is unacceptable by God's standards is that this behavior moves us outside the will of God, damaging the intended relationship between Creator and creation. In other words, when we deliberately choose to act in accordance with our own will rather than with God's will, our fellowship with God is diminished and we begin to harden our hearts toward Him. In time, such disobedience can lead to a total severance of our bond with God, which in turn can lead to the loss of our salvation. These consequences have absolutely no bearing on our chronological age or emotional maturity! Those who deliberately choose to walk outside of God's will are putting themselves at risk for some very devastating consequences.

Promiscuity is definitely not acceptable in the eyes of the Lord. 1 Corinthians 5:1 states,

" It is actually reported that there is immorality among you, and immorality of such a kind as does not exist even among the Gentiles, that someone has his father's wife." In verse 9 of the same chapter, Paul continues by saying, "I wrote you in my letter

not to associate with immoral people." Then in chapter 6, verse 9, Christians are clearly warned about God's views regarding sexuality for mankind. This verse reads, " Or do

you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals.......shall inherit the kingdom of God." Other Scriptures denouncing fornication can be found in Matt. 15:19, Acts 15:28-29 and Hebrews 13:4.

In 1 Peter 2:11, the Apostle Peter tells God's people, "Beloved, I urge you as aliens and strangers to abstain from fleshly lusts that wage war against the soul." This is evidence that throughout the ages, our flesh has been a battlefield upon which Satan may claim the victory over us by enticing us to pursue the pleasures of our own desires rather than fix our sights on what is pleasing to God. Satan is not stupid. He knows our weaknesses and knows how to use them against us to pull us away from serving God. This Scripture tells us that our flesh wars against our soul. It is wise to consider what is at stake in this matter. We know from other Scriptures already cited that God has decreed that those who conduct their lives in pursuits of the flesh will not inherit His kingdom.

Are you willing to trade the promise of eternal life as an heir to that kingdom for a fleeting moment of sexual pleasure? Hold onto that question and bring it to mind the next time Satan tries to entice you away from serving God by tempting you in fleshly pursuits. Better yet, reaffirm your commitment to God as you think about your choices and you will have the Holy Spirit standing at the ready to lend assistance in resisting the enemy.

Masturbation, Oral Sex, Sexual Fantasy

Masturbationor self-pleasuring, contrary to many teachings, is neither condemned or condoned in Scripture. There is mention in Genesis 38:9-10 wherein Onan spilled his seed on the ground rather than inside his brother's widow (It was customary back then that a brother had an obligation to produce offspring for his brother by the widow, if the brother had died childless.) but it is unclear from Scripture whether he had had inter-course with the woman or if this was an emission achieved from masturbation.

God judged Onan, which resulted in his death. God was angry by Onan's refusal to impregnate his brother's widow. Onan not only disobeyed the obligation he was required to perform but he made a pretense of going into the woman's tent to do as he was told but then refused to permit his semen from entering the woman. The issue in the text was not masturbation; it was disobedience. This passage has sometimes been erroneously used to convince people that masturbation is a sin.

It can be reasonably argued that masturbation is a preferred outlet for sexual release that is permissible for an unmarried person, provided that it is done in private and not with or in the company of another person. Since God has very clearly condemned sexual relations of any kind between unmarried partners, it seems that it is a far better solution to use self-pleasure to take care of a sexual need, which may help one to avoid falling into the sin of fornication or adultery.

It can also be argued that if God regards masturbation as a sexual sin, He would surely have said so somewhere in the Bible. Since He did not say anything about this and since it does not violate any of His laws or the laws of government, one can reasonably assume that masturbation carries no condemnation from God.

Now, in the case of married partners, self-pleasuring may be indulged in as part of the marital act, provided that it is mutually acceptable to both parties. Masturbation may also be an acceptable outlet within the marriage if one partner's need or desire for sexual relations is not in balance with the other partner's need or desire.

However, it must be stated that under no circumstances is it acceptable for one spouse to use self-pleasuring as a means of avoiding the marital act with his or her spouse. The Bible is very clear that each spouse is to fulfill his or her marital duty to the other. This protects the marriage bond and makes adultery less of a temptation when both spouses are able to enjoy one another fully and freely.

Oral Sexshould be defined by the proper words and definitions before we attempt to go forward in this study. Cunnilingus is a sexual activity involving oral contact with the female genitals. Fellatio is a sexual activity involving oral contact with the male genitals.

One of the most unfortunate consequences of President Clinton's affair with Monica Lewinski is that it confused the fact that participation in oral sex is still sexual relations. His insistence that he had "never had sexual relations with that woman" was untrue. Oral sex is definitely sex. There is no other definition for it. Both society and God seem to be in agreement on this one! In President Clinton's case, this sexual contact also constituted an adulterous act since he engaged in this activity with someone other than his own spouse.

Sadly, an awful lot of single people now believe that as long as they do not participate in intercourse, they are not guilty of sexual sin. Oral sex seems to be a favorite way to enjoy sexual pleasure while trying to wiggle out of the guilt. (No pun intended.) It doesn't work that way. Oral sex is still sex, thus if an unmarried person is engaging in this practice, he or she is engaging in sin. There is no question of whether or not God would find the person guilty of sin. God is no fool. He can recognize sin, no matter how we try to disguise it, hide it or justify it. It is that simple.

So now comes the question, is oral sex wrong or sinful for married couples? This question is one that many clergy find uncomfortable to answer, either because they themselves are uncomfortable with the subject or because they are afraid of offending someone else's sensibilities with their answer, or perhaps they just may have never taken a close look at what Scripture has to say about it.

The Song of Songs or The Song of Solomon (either is correct) is a Biblical reference to the variety of sexual pleasures that God intended married couples to share to express their love for one another. It is explicit and erotic in nature. Some Christians have found it embarrassing to do more than a cursory reading of it. A complete study of this book of the Bible would teach them that God did not intend for married couples to be stilted in their lovemaking. The Song of Solomon is a verbal celebration of the physical joining of husband and wife. Examine just a few of the passages to see how they may relate to oral sex among married couples.

Chapter 1:3, "Your oils have a pleasing fragrance..." Chapter 2:3 reads, "Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. In his shade I took great delight and sat down, and his fruit was sweet to my taste." It continues in this vein in 4:10-11. "How beautiful is your love, sister, my bride! How much better is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your oils than all kinds of spices. Your lips, my bride, drip honey; honey and milk are under your tongue..." And then there is the verse in 4:16 that says in part, "make my garden breathe out fragrance, Let its spices be wafted abroad. May my beloved come into his garden and eat its choice fruits!"

It is important that spouses respect one another's feelings in all matters concerning their lovemaking. God intended that it be for their mutual pleasure so it is not fair or even wise for one partner to pressure the other into participating in something that he or she is not comfortable with or has an aversion to. When sexual expression between a husband and a wife becomes obligatory, feelings become hurt, people grow resentful and both partners become less fulfilled or satisfied with their sexual encounters. This can and often does, spill over into other areas of the marital relationship. The most loving thing that each spouse can do for the other is to be sensitive to their partner's feelings and be patient in tutoring one another in what needs or desires each has.

Sexual Fantasy is not Scripturally forbidden either, except in cases where the object of one's fantasy is a real person, whose features one conjures up to stimulate sexual excitement. We are told not to look at others to lust after them. Willfully calling someone to mind so as to fantasize about him or her in a sexual manner is sin.

The type of sexual fantasy that we are discussing here is not the subconscious fantasy that may occur during sleep. It is very common for humans to do this without their will being involved and as such, they are not guilty of sin unless they choose to follow up on the unbidden fantasy in either thought or action toward that person during waking hours.

In other words, if you go to sleep one night and sometime during sleep you have an erotic dream about a co-worker, you are not guilty of wrongdoing. But if you later think about that dream and decide to start a flirtation with that person, you are crossing the line and need to rethink things.

If you willfully lay down to sleep and deliberately begin fantasizing about a person that you are not married to before falling asleep, you are guilty of lusting after him or her. This is sin. Even meditating on the fantasy can be crossing that fine line between acceptable and unacceptable behavior and it is a matter to examine if you find yourself doing this.

Open the Bible to Phil.4:8 and read, "Finally brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these." This Scripture can be beneficial to help combat impure thoughts should fantasy create areas of sin in one's life.

Married couples may act out sexual fantasies if they choose and again, only if both partners are amenable to doing so. Dressing up as a French maid or other such stuff is perfectly ok. What would not be ok would be if a couple decided to pretend to be another party that one or both of them know and then act out a fantasy of sexual relations with that party. Even though they would be making love to their own spouse physically, they would be guilty of engaging sexual feelings for someone other than their own spouse and God does not approve of this. There are a lot of other fantasies that would be Biblically inappropriate so it is very important that the couple confine their fantasies to things that would not be offensive to God or to one another.

Using props, costumes or various forms of lingerie are all ok. Even using aids such as body frostings, sex toys, games, etc. are all great ways to spice up one's love life and there is nothing Biblically wrong with couples indulging in sex play to keep their sexual interest in one another vibrant and alive.

Out of respect for one's spouse, please keep silent on the subject of bedroom intimacies unless you are absolutely certain that your spouse will not be offended or embarrassed by that knowledge being shared. Usually the wisest choice would be that this information remain private between the husband and wife.

There may be certain circumstances such as teaching couples seminars or other reasons wherein a couple may decide to talk about their own personal experience(s) but again, this is the most intimate part of a marriage and violating the sanctity of it could really damage the spousal relationship.

Varying the place of lovemaking is also acceptable and can be stimulating, but it is against the law to engage in sexual activity in a public place so use discretion when deciding where a rendezvous will occur!

Pornography
Pornography needs to be addressed since it is now epidemic across all socioeconomic lines. It has infiltrated both Christian and non-Christian sectors, involving both genders and all age groups in our society.

Pornography is specifically and deliberately designed to stimulate sexual response and it can become addictive. On those grounds alone, it compromises a Christian's ability to be found wholly pleasing to God. We know that it is risky business to incite the senses in a sexual manner because in doing so, we risk crossing that fine line between being tempted and being overcome by such temptation. There is enough sexual stimuli or temptation flooding our senses merely living our day-to-day lives. We would be foolish to deliberately set ourselves up for the potential to fall into sin. Addictions cause us to become weak in specific areas, which then opens the door to put our hunger for the addiction above our hunger to be pleasing to God.

Another problem with pornography is that it degrades the expression of sexual love by taking what is meant by God to be a private act between two married people and turning it into a perverse form of entertainment. Although pornography is indeed an extremely lucrative industry worldwide, it cheapens the gift of self that couples give to one another in marriage and it devalues the gift of God's provision for sexual pleasure that He chose for us within such marriages.

Our sexuality is not intended by God to be flaunted as a spectator sport. Our bodies are called "a temple of God" and "a dwelling place for the Holy Spirit." It would be a dishonor to God for us to publicly display our nudity and sexual passions, but it is even more dishonoring to Him when that display is deliberately generated toward someone other than our own spouse.

Pornographic displays include but are not necessarily limited to videos, magazines, songs, photographs and/or other forms of "artistic expression." By choosing to be entertained with such material, we allow our sexual focus to turn away from our spouse and toward someone else. In such manner, we are debasing the vessel in which the Holy Spirit dwells and through which the Holy Spirit administers His Gifts.

Whether we are the ones portraying pornographic acts (art/acting/writing etc.) or the ones merely viewing them, money is inarguably involved somewhere in the production and promotion of pornography. It is undeniably a "sex in exchange for money" industry. The pornographic industry can be likened to a pimp selling the services of his whores. So regardless of whether you are a participant or a viewer, you are either a whore or her "John." Either way, the sexual sin is yours. You own it.

Furthermore, since we know that Christ also indwells us, wouldn't such behavior be like prostituting Him, just as we are prostituting ourselves? It is dishonoring to our Savior for us to indulge our flesh in the viewing of others' nudity and/or sexual passions or in portraying our own, knowing that Jesus Christ lives within each one of us. It is God's intention that we grow into the likeness of Christ as we mature in our Christian walk. In that context, it is fair to ask, " Would Jesus Christ entertain Himself by supporting the pornographic industry?" Did you answer "No" to that question? Then before you choose to indulge in that form of entertainment for yourself, you might want to ask how doing so would bring you closer to God's plan for you to become more Christ-like?

As God's Children of Promise, we want to please Him and walk in obedience to His will. The battles of our flesh can be strong. Temptation can get the best of any of us. Do not be foolish! We must avoid all association with pornography in any form to be walking in obedience with God's plan for our lives. He did not pick us up out of the gutter and clean us up just so we could go back and wallow in our own filth again.

Pornography can sneak into our homes, workplaces and recreational activities without our being aware of it unless we are diligent to protect ourselves from its infiltration into our lives. Pornography can take on various forms, some quite blatant while others may appear to be fairly innocent. Christians need to examine closely the lyrics of popular songs, the corresponding videos to those songs, video games, comic books, the plot of a novel and the scenes from movies, regardless of the rating that such things are marketed under.

Something that is gaining in popularity in our culture today is the videotaping of love-making by married couples. Although this may not be considered a sinful act in and of itself, the problem with this is that not one of us can give an ironclad guarantee that such videotapes will never fall into the wrong hands. Consider that such tapes could become misplaced in the event of relocating, or maybe the couple splits up and one party uses the tape(s) as a lever of retaliation against the other party. Perhaps, as can happen, there is an accident and the couple is killed. Then the children or other relatives of the couple go through their personal items to divide these between family members. The tapes are viewed to determine what they are and everyone is embarrassed, and more importantly, God's plan of keeping "the marriage bed held in honor" has now been involuntarily violated. If the married couple had never videotaped lovemaking between themselves, their privacy and God's gift of sexual expression would not have been degraded. It is wisdom to consider all of the potential ramifications before engaging in this activity.

Most of us would agree that the phone sex industry is pornographic, but having a phone in one's hand does not constitute the pornography. It is the nature of the conversation that defines the pornography. Therefore, any conversation that is deliberately geared to stimulate the responses of another person (other than one's own spouse) in a sexual manner should also be considered pornographic. Most of us have never really stopped to consider this idea, have we? Remember that the Bible condemns coarse jesting so this is a good basis upon which we should develop the mind-set that we should be careful of how we converse with others, lest our words stir the sexual senses and we tempt one another to sin. This is true whether our conversations take place in person, over the telephone or via e-mail.The Internet is a minefield of potentially tempting sources of pornographic opportunities.

Use caution when participating in chat rooms, or communicating with others that you have never met before or do not know well. Be careful when opening e-mail from unknown sources and when navigating sites that may appear completely innocent because many an unsolicited pornographic photo or message has been dumped on the unwary user.

Certain nightclubs that offer entertainment in the forms of nudity, strip tease, pole dancing, lap dancing and/or other suggestive behaviors between employees and patrons fall within the criteria for pornography. Art and advertising are also seemingly innocent ways in which we can be seduced by the power of sexual lure. It is important to realize that society's ratings are lax when compared to the guidelines that God has given us in what we are to allow into our minds (Phil. 4:8).

Thus far, we have seen that God has ordained marriage as a sinless outlet for human sexuality. Husbands and wives are told to not withhold sexual relations from one another lest it lead to temptation to seek gratification outside the marriage bed. We know that God forbids adultery. He has not given any "permission slips" for adulterous activity regardless of personal circumstances that may seem to justify it by our own fallible human reasoning.

God is Sovereign. We do not have the right to dispute His commandments. We have more than sufficient Scriptural evidence telling us that in spite of what our culture currently projects, promiscuity is not acceptable behavior any more than adultery is acceptable behavior. God warns us that He will judge unrepentant sin. Those who choose to live in unrepentant sin shall not be given an inheritance into His kingdom. We have now also considered Biblically sound reasons why Christians are to avoid any and all involvement with pornography since pornography is sexually sinful. Sexual sin falls into a special category because it is a sin against a person's own body.

Therefore, whether active or passive, if we are knowingly participating in or permitting ourselves to be influenced by sexual sin, we need to consider God's views on these matters and go to Him with an attitude of repentance. Are you ready to give a heartfelt "Amen" to what you have learned so far? God really wants you to be able to do so.

Homosexuality

One of the most troubling aspects of human sexuality confronting us today is the growing acceptance of homosexuality as an alternative lifestyle in our culture. The push for gay/lesbian marriages to become legalized in the United States threatens the structure of the American family as we know it. It makes a mockery of God's intended plan for children to be reared by two parents (Father and Mother) whose roles Scripture has clearly defined. Worse than that, it is in direct conflict with the Scripture in Hebrews 13:4 that commands us to "Let marriage be held in honor by all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled....." God is absolutely opposed to homosexuality. He would not see any "honor" in a marriage, legal or not, between homosexual couples.

In fact, God is so opposed to homosexuality that He has irrefutably stated that He will not allow those who engage in homosexual acts to be permitted into His kingdom. 1 Corinthians 6:9 says, "Or do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals....." When God pulls up the Welcome Mat and puts a No Admittance sign in its place, He's not just blowing smoke! His judgment on such individuals is eternal damnation rather than eternal life. We cannot afford to sit in passive silence and fool ourselves into thinking that this societal acceptance of "coming out of the closet" is not going to reap horrible consequences for generations to come.

Contrary to current claims, homosexuality does not have a biological or genetic basis. This has been proven by scientific research involving pairs of identical twins wherein one twin was heterosexual and the other was homosexual. Since identical twins have identical genes, it clearly disproves that this has a genetic origin. Rather, it suggests that sexual preference is a choice one makes, either deliberately or by unconsciously submitting to influences the individual has been exposed to. Furthermore, it has been demonstrated that those who practice a homosexual lifestyle are able to change their sexual orientation and become heterosexual.

Neither homosexuality or bi-sexuality are considered righteous before God, yet many people who are not well-versed in Scripture will accept these aberrations of human sexuality as perfectly normal and natural because the society we live in refuses to take a firm stand against these unnatural sexual behaviors. There are even some churches that are now embracing homosexual couples within their congregations, which only adds to the confusion for the Scripturally ignorant among us. If churches accept this, then surely God also accepts it, right? Wrong! Such churches are making a mockery of Christianity and the Word of God!

We are called to love all people but we are not called to love all that people do. Sin is sin and nowhere in Scripture are God's people told to close their eyes to sin, either within the church or within the world.

So why do some churches allow gay/lesbian couples to be called members? Is it to add to the rank & file on the membership rolls? Is it to appease the outcry of liberals who see Christians as being prejudiced against gay/lesbian rights? Are these churches even attempting to show such couples the perversity of their union? Do they have programs in place to assist homosexuals in overcoming their sinful lifestyles and to disciple these people in ways that will lead them away from eternal destruction and into the loving arms of a heavenly Father who forbids the very acts that they are engaging in?

Whatever the motivation is, make no mistake about this: acceptance by human congrega-tions does not reflect Biblical teaching on homosexuality. It does not matter how many churches accept it. It doesn't matter how many Sundays each year one attends services. It doesn't even matter how high up the ladder of respectability (deacon, elder, pastor) one climbs. Homosexuality is sin and God condemns it. Until repentance occurs and the sin is no longer being propagated, it is Scripturally evident that people such as these cannot be considered to be our brothers and sisters in Christ for Christ is not in them.

Leviticus 20:13 is pretty blunt. It states, "If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with a woman, both of them have committed a detestable act; and they shall surely be put to death. Their bloodguiltiness is upon them." Both the man who initiated the sexual encounter and the man (male) who agreed to participate in it are judged to have committed a detestable act by God. Compelling evidence of God's disapproval of same-gender sexual relationships can be found throughout Scripture. This is a matter that God takes very seriously. Lev. 18:22 says that, "You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; It is an abomination."

Those who engage in homosexual lifestyles will suffer God's wrath. He will abandon them to their wickedness for a time but judgment will occur as Rom. 1:26, 27 proclaims. "For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men, committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error."

So it really is irrelevant how many human societies decree that homosexuality is an acceptable alternative lifestyle. God says it positively is not and He uses phrases such as "indecent acts", "detestable act", "degrading passions", "unnatural" and "It is an abomination" throughout His word when talking about same-gender sexual relations. God is not lukewarm regarding His viewpoints on this subject. He is angry and disgusted by it, which is clear from the strong condemnation He expresses in the Bible.

The prevalence of homosexuality in today's culture will increase the probability that sometime or another we will all become acquaintances, neighbors, friends or relatives of someone living this lifestyle. If this happens, we are not called to hate the sinner. We are called only to hate the sin. Actually, those who engage in this practice are no different from anyone else who lives their life in unrepentant sin. They need Jesus in their lives and it is our calling as Christians to be "Jesus with skin on" and to model His love toward them, with the hope that they will one day be open to hearing the gospel and choose to accept Christ as their Lord and Savior. Pay close attention! Loving the person does not equal loving or condoning the person's sin.

We cannot allow ourselves to be swayed into softening our values or into becoming blasé about homosexuality regardless of how narrow-minded others choose to see us. As God's people, we are called to model God's views on all matters, even when God's views make us unpopular with the secular world. We need to remind ourselves that God's opinion is the only opinion that matters since ultimately, all creation will stand before Him on the day of judgment when He will make the decision on where we will spend our eternity. Until such time though, we have an obligation to uphold His word and try to reach out to those who do not know God.

Incest & Pedophilia

Incest is strictly forbidden Biblically and most, if not all U.S. states also have laws governing this type of sexual relationship. Deut. 27:20 reads, "Cursed is he who lies with his father's wife, because he has uncovered his father's skirt....." Again in Deut. 27, verse 22 Moses told God's people, "Cursed is he who lies with his sister, the daughter of his father or mother......" Verse 23 goes on to say, "Cursed is he who lies with his mother-in-law...."

Sadly, as our culture continues to decline in morality, incestuous relationships will continue to occur and many of its participants will be unwilling victims, usually children. Statistically, more children are sexually abused by relatives (or close family friends) than are children abused by total strangers.

The sins perpetrated on an innocent child by adults who give free reign to their unnatural appetites often have far-reaching and permanent consequences on the lives of both the child and the perpetrator. Social and psychological damages are impossible to accurately estimate, but there is no doubt that tragic damage does occur. However, it must be said that even when incest takes place between two consenting adults, there are unpleasant repercussions that can affect entire families, including the resulting offspring of the union (if any).

The Bible is full of stories depicting sexual unions among siblings and other blood relatives, however, it is important to understand the reason that such unions had occurred. (Genesis is particularly helpful in this area.)

Out of necessity due to a limited gene pool, unions between close relatives occurred in the early Old Testament era to fulfill God's commandment that man and woman were to "multiply and fill the earth." Remember that God had only created one man and one woman from which all mankind would descend. During this period, although sin had now entered the world, the created man and woman were originally blessed with perfection at the time of their creation. Therefore, the genes that they contributed to their closest descendents were of a purer composition than the genes that mankind now contributes to the next generation.

With each subsequent generation, humans grew further from that original perfect creation God had designed in Adam and Eve. Sin became more pronounced as man continued to pursue his own will over God's will, which opened a whole Pandora's box of resulting natural consequences in the form of genetic weaknesses, diseases and defects.

You will note in Scripture that man's lifespan was originally documented in terms of several hundred years, decreasing as time passed. Today, we view a lifespan of 100 years as a real cause for celebration!

As the earth's population increased, the need to intermarry diminished until it was no longer necessary to join two closely related human beings in a marital union. As we can see in Scripture, God began restricting marital unions between specific relatives. Being our Creator, He knew that this would eventually lead to serious consequences as the generations of man continued.

Unfortunately, some societies did not foresee what the continuation of inbreeding would cost them, so it was a very common practice for those of royal blood to marry within their own families to insure that their bloodlines remained "untainted." This practice resulted in some serious genetic problems being passed from generation to generation among the ruling class and finally grew to be such a serious concern that the practice of inbreeding or marrying another person who was closely related was finally abolished.

Today, we can clearly understand the benefits of taking advantage of the huge gene pool that we have available to us and we are educated enough in the area of genetics to realize that the larger the gene pool is that we are working with, the less likely it is that familial weaknesses will be passed down to our children and grandchildren.

Pedophilia,which is an adult person's abnormal sexual desire for children, is another perverse form of sexual behavior practiced by humans in alarmingly growing numbers. Although there are no Scriptures that specifically identify this perversion, there is enough evidence found in Scripture to tell us that God condemns using children in this manner. In Psalms 127:3, we are told that "Behold, children are a gift of the Lord; the fruit of the womb is a reward."

Even by our society's current standards, we understand that both "gifts" and "rewards" are things that have value. It would be considered extremely offensive to the giver if someone were to treat either one disrespectfully. God is the Giver of the precious gift of children. God will not bestow favor on someone who abuses a child, unless that person is able to recognize that the abuse is sinful and is willing to repent and turn away from this behavior. Bear in mind though, that repenting from the behavior does not undo all of the damage that has been done to the child. It may not repair any of the damage. But genuine repentance does restore the relationship between God and sinner.

Pedophilia is a criminal offense in this country. As such, it is an ungodly practice since we are told in Hebrews 13:17 that we are to obey our leaders and in Matthew 22:16-21 we are told to "render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's and to God, the things that are God's." Application of these principles makes pedophilia a sin, since there are laws that forbid adults from pursuing children for their sexual pleasure.

A strong case against engaging in the practice of pedophilia can be made by examining how Jesus Christ related to children during His ministry here on earth. Scripture in both Matthew 19:13-14 and Mark 10:13-14 demonstrate that Jesus greatly valued children. In both of these Scriptures, Jesus rebukes His disciples for trying to hinder the children from coming to Him. He said, "the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." In Matthew 21:15-16, Jesus asked the chief priests and Pharisees if they had never read that "out of the mouths of infants and nursing babes Thou hast prepared praise for Thyself" which is indicative of the deep regard that God has for little ones. Jesus used a child as an example of who His followers should be like in Matthew 18:2-6 and then followed it up by warning us not to cause them to stumble.

When adults (pedophiles) prey on children for their own sexual gratification, they are introducing that child to knowledge, curiosity and sexual responses that the child is not emotionally or physically prepared to deal with. Statistically, children who have been victims of sexual abuse (and that is what pedophilia is!) have low self-esteem, often become promiscuous, and in many cases, suffer from depression and/or suicidal ideology.

These consequences surely meet the definition of "causing one of these to stumble."

Other Perversions

Now it is time to investigate other areas of Scripturally forbidden sexual behaviors. I am struggling to be as candid as possible in handling all of the subject matter without causing undue embarrassment to the readers of this teaching material. If I unwittingly offend anyone, I apologize in advance and ask your forbearance in allowing me to present these topics in the manner most natural to me, while still remaining true to God's Word.

Necrophilia is a sexual aberration defined as "an erotic attraction to corpses." Also referred to as necromancy.

The historian Strato makes reference to necromancy as the principle form of divination amongst the people of Persia; and it is also believed to have been widespread amongst the peoples of Chaldea, Etruria and Babylonia. (Referenced from Sex Education Links.com)

From that same internet reference source, it is stated that "according to Dr. Jonathan Rosman and Dr. Phillip Resnick there are 3 basic types of "true" necrophilia.

1) Necrophilic homicide, which is murder to obtain a corpse for sexual pleasure.

2) Regular necrophilia, which is the use of corpses already dead for sexual

pleasure. This is the most common form.

3) Necrophilic fantasy, which is envisioning the sexual acts but not acting on

them.

Information gathered from the internet at The Free Dictionary.com/necromancy says that biophilia is the "love of life" and necrophilia is the "love of death." The word necromancy is an Aramaic word that derives from the Greek nekros or "dead" and manteia or "divination." It has a subsidiary meaning derived from an archaic alternative form of the word nigromancy (black) in which the magical force of "darkness" is gained from acting upon corpses.

The Bible is very clear on the avoidance of all things occult, which include divination, black magic, voodoo (in which necromancy is extensively practiced.) See related scriptures in Lev. 19:26, 31, Lev. 20:6, Ezek. 13:6, 2 Chr. 33:6, Jer. 14:14. It is fair to point out though, that necromancy is not always involved in occult practices. However, as Christians, it is important that we obey God and avoid all things that are occult. (Some include seemingly innocent "fun" such as levitation, séance, horoscope, fortune telling, palm reading, and playing with a Ouija board.) These can open doors to a spirit world that thrives under Satanic powers.

There is also the verse in Proverbs 8:36 where God says, ".....all those who hate Me love death." One could infer that it would not be possible to love death (and corpses) and to love God simultaneously. Since necrophilia is the "love of death," and is known to be associated with occult practices, we can deduce that those who love God will be averse to this form of sexual gratification.

There is another area of sexual behavior that humans have been known to engage in, which I confess I am a bit overemotional about. But because we are seeking God's will in all matters of human sexuality, I think that it is important to try to address as many areas as possible, regardless of how distasteful it can be. I cannot guarantee that I will be able to be totally neutral in discussing this next topic but I give you my promise that I will do my best to be as unbiased as possible.

I myself am usually pretty uninhibited about sexual matters but find this one area extremely difficult to discuss. I am almost certain that many of you will find it equally difficult as well. For that reason, I am going to present a very brief summary of it then give God's views on it and then move on to other sexual perversions and fetishes that some human beings are known to indulge in.

As far back as Old Testament civilizations centuries ago, mankind has perverted the use of their own bodies by engaging in sexual activities with animals. The proper term for this sexual deviation is Bestiality. It is unnatural, both for the human and for the animal. It is at best, a cruel example of animal abuse because such sexual encounters with humans generally negate the possibility of an animal so abused to ever be able to be a trustworthy companion or service animal for mankind. Euthanasia of the abused animal is usually the only responsible option available once the animal had been conditioned to respond in a sexual manner toward humans.

Leviticus 18:23 says, "Also, you shall not have intercourse with any animal to be defiled with it, nor shall any woman stand before an animal to mate with it; it is a perversion." In Leviticus 20:15, 16 we read, " If there is a man that lies with an animal, he shall surely be put to death; you shall also kill the animal. If there is a woman who approaches any animal to mate with it, you shall kill the woman and the animal; they shall surely be put to death. Their bloodguiltiness is upon them". Deut. 27:21 reinforces that by stating, "Cursed is he who lies with any animal. And all the people shall say 'Amen'." The Bible states in Exodus 22:19 that "Whoever lies with an animal shall surely be put to death."

What cruelties we dare to inflict in pursuit of sexual thrills! At worst, sexual relations between humans and animals are abhorrent to God. This debases His creation; both mankind and the animals which are ill-used. Although we have all probably heard that stupid saying about being from "where the men are men and the sheep know it!" the truth is that bestiality is not something to joke about. It is not at all funny or amusing! It is heartbreakingly cruel, disgusting and perverse. It is clear from His word that God strictly forbids it. No ifs, ands or buts about it. It is wrong and there is absolutely no argument of merit that could possibly support it as an acceptable act of human sexual expression.

Anal Sex is the sexual aberration involving intercourse via the anus rather than the vagina. It is an unclean practice since the penis penetrates the anus and is subjected to

fecal contamination of the male organ. Old Testament practices show that humans buried their fecal waste as it was considered indecent and unclean. Human waste is still considered unclean. It can transmit parasites, disease, and other bacteria, which is why health departments all across America have stringent rules regarding the issue of hand-washing after rest room visits.

This perverse form of sexual gratification originated among homosexuals as far back in man's history as Old Testament times. Throughout scripture, you will find it referred to as sodomy, which our modern dictionaries now define as "anal intercourse between two males." God destroyed entire cities because of this deviant practice. God condemned it without exception. Today, many states are repealing sodomy laws but that does make it a sanctioned behavior by God.

Although the Bible does not specifically address this behavior among heterosexual, married couples, there is enough said in the Scriptures to draw the conclusion that this is not something that God would find pleasing in His people.

Deuteronomy 23:12-14 says, " You shall also have a place outside the camp and go out there, and you shall have a spade among your tools, and it shall be when you sit down outside, you shall dig with it and shall turn to cover your excrement. Since the Lord your God walks in the midst of your camp to deliver you and to defeat your enemies before you, therefore your camp must be holy; and He must not see anything indecent among you lest He turn away from you."

In Leviticus, Chapter 8, Moses was very precise in what parts of the animals he used in a sin offering to the Lord. He was very careful to exclude the animals' refuse or waste and disposed of these outside of his camp by burning them as the Lord had commanded him. Exodus Chapter 29 testifies that Aaron too, had been commanded by the Lord to adhere to this same exclusion in offering his sacrifices to God.

One could compare the Refuse Gate or in some translations, the Dung Gate spoken of in Neh. 3:14 and the anus. This was a gate in the Jerusalem Wall that led out to the valley of Hinnom, where rubbish or waste was dumped. Likewise, waste exits the human body by way of the anus, making it similar in function to the gate in the Jerusalem Wall. Meta-phorically, one could say that the anus is the Dung Gate of our bodies.

Anal sex can lead to health problems in participants, including but not limited to such things as tearing of the anal tissue, infection, STD's, etc. Additionally, this type of intercourse has the ability to cause bowel incontinence in individuals whose rectal muscles have been stretched excessively or repeatedly by penetration of the penis.

We already know that God calls our bodies the Temple of the Holy Spirit and is adamant that we are to do nothing to defile that temple. Given the fact that anal sex is unclean, that it originated due to the perversion of mankind's unnatural lust of men for men, is clearly condemned in Scripture (among males), and that it negatively impacts the human body, it is this author's opinion that God does not sanction this form of sexual activity and that His people would do well to avoid engaging in it altogether.

Popular Fetishes

Fetishes are when a person obtains sexual arousal and/or gratification by using or thinking about an inanimate object or viewing and/or touching a particular part of the body.

Fetishism involves the use of a nonliving object or a body part that a person regards as a sexual object. Fetishism is practiced almost exclusively by males. The most common objects used are women's intimate apparel or parts of the body such as feet.

The fetishist craves any sensory perception of the object of attachment and frequently masturbates while holding, smelling, stroking or rubbing the fetish object. Often, this type of stimuli is strongly preferred or even required for sexual excitement to occur.

There are additional sexual behaviors that fall under the broad heading of fetishes. Many of these also fall under the heading of criminal acts, which automatically put them out-side of God's will. Others are not criminal acts but either are or can be dangerous to those participating in them, depending on the amount of self-control a person is able to exercise during extreme sexual arousal. As these are listed, it should become clear to the reader which of these activities are criminal and which are potentially dangerous, bearing in mind that some of the fetishes listed could fall under both categories.

Exhibitionismis obtaining sexual arousal by exposing one's genitals to an unsuspecting stranger, usually in inappropriate settings. Scripture is clear that one is to maintain decency and modesty of their bodies. Exposing one's genitals to strangers is not decent or modest and it is also a criminal act. (See Scriptures in Genesis whereupon following their sin, the first couple felt the need to cover themselves.) In Genesis 9:22-25, Noah had become drunk on wine and Ham and his son Canaan looked upon Noah's nakedness. Noah's other two sons went into their father's tent and walked backwards to cover Noah with a garment without looking at his nakedness.

Voyeurism(Peeping Tom behavior) is obtaining sexual arousal and/or gratification by observing nude individuals without their knowledge or consent. The Bible is clear that we are not to look upon another person so as to lust after them. In Matt. 5:28 we read, "but I say to you, that everyone who looks upon a woman to lust for her has committed adultery with her already in his heart." Then in 1 John 2:16 we learn that the apostle taught Christ's church saying, "For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world." Voyeurism is a criminal offense, which is additional incentive for those who love Christ to abstain from the behavior.

Sadismis obtaining sexual arousal and gratification primarily or exclusively by the act of inflicting pain on another person. This is not a Godly manner in which to treat our spouse (who is the only person we are allowed to have sexual relations with Scripturally) and although some couples may engage in sadism in a very mild degree, it is prudent to bear in mind that one could easily lose control and go too far in this game and inflict real injury on a husband or wife.

Biblically, there is evidence that would indicate that God finds this deviant behavior unacceptable. First of all, we know that a man is to love his wife in the same manner that Christ loves the church. The church is called the Bride of Christ. Christ is meek (2 Cor. 10:1). We are also told to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which we have been called, with humility, gentleness and love. (Eph. 4:1-2) Matt. 5:5 tells us that "Blessed are the gentle...." Receiving pleasure from inflicting pain on another is not Godly conduct.

Masochismis obtaining sexual arousal and gratification by having pain inflicted on oneself. Again, it would bear considering where this type of sexual activity could lead.

Biblically, we know from 1 Chr. 16:22 that in Asaph's psalm of thanksgiving to God, he

acknowledged that God did not permit anyone, even kings, to oppress His people or do harm to His prophets. The prophet, Micah said that God has told man what is good and what God requires of man; that is to do justice, to love kindness and to walk humbly with Him. (Mic. 6:8) It would seem that needing to have pain inflicted on oneself in order to receive sexual gratification would violate one's ability to love kindness. Also, we can find plenty of advice on how to perceive and respect our bodies in 1 Corinthians, Chapter 6. In verse 13, we are told that our body is for the Lord. In verse 15, we are told that our body is a member of Christ. Then in verses 19 & 20, we are told that our body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in us and that our body does not belong to us, but to God because it was purchased with the price of Christ's blood. We are told that we are to glorify God in our bodies. Allowing someone to slap, beat, pinch or in any other manner inflict pain upon one's body for our sexual pleasure does not glorify God!

Transvestismcan fall under the fetishistic definition however it needs to be said that cross-dressing for the purpose of costuming for certain holidays (Halloween) or for performances in theater, etc. does not make one a transvestite. It is only when one cross-

dresses because he needs it to achieve sexual gratification that this behavior classifies one as a transvestite. This would put him (they are usually male) outside of God's will.

Scripture tells us that women are not to dress as men nor are men to be effeminate. It is also important to state at this juncture that not all cross-dressers or transvestites are homosexual. This is a misconception. There are transvestites who actually cross-dress at home, with their wives' knowledge and/or consent. Many transvestites are heterosexual but derive an unusual pleasure from dressing as females.

Cross-dressing has become big business in the entertainment community. Men actually pass themselves off on stage as women, with it often being difficult to tell them apart from the genuine article. There is a counter-culture wherein cross-dressers freely and publicly masquerade as females not for entertainment but as a lifestyle. We have seen this type of transvestism frequently portrayed in the media, particularly on talk shows, certain movies, etc.

But there have also been movies such as "Tootsie" and "Mrs. Doubtfire," which are two box office hits that come to mind that cultivated positive emotions in viewers. It is important to point out that in neither of these movies did the male dress as a female for the purpose of sexual pleasure, thus distinguishing these from men who are transvestites.

Kleptomaniain the true sense is becoming sexually aroused and gratified by the act of stealing or aroused by the danger of being caught stealing. Stealing is a crime and God's word condemns thievery and stealing altogether. Ex. 20:15 says, "You shall not steal." In Mark 7:21 Jesus said, "For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed the evil thoughts, fornications, thefts, murders, adulteries." Notice that Jesus puts stealing in the same class as fornication, adultery and murder. Jesus repeats this warning in Mark 10:19 by saying, "You know the commandments, Do not murder, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal...." There is no room for argument here. God condemns stealing thus this fetish is outside of God's will as well as the law of man.

Pyromania is becoming sexually aroused and gratified watching and/or setting

fires, or from the heat of a fire. If one commits arson, it is a crime. Being a spectator at a fire and getting sexually aroused by it, is not a crime and there is nothing in Scripture to really guide one except to say that as with most of these activities, one can conclude that this does not fall under the guise of normal human sexuality.

All of the activities described in this particular portion of our study can be summed up in one Greek word (sexual) Paraphilia, which means "beyond normal." Due to the excessive numbers of fetishes practiced in the world today, this study has limited itself to merely a few of the more common ones.

The more exposure you have to this type of information, the less shocking or repulsive it may become to you. This could open the door to involvement in things that you would not ordinarily be drawn to in the natural. We have seen (culturally) that the mind's perception can be altered by repeated exposure to violence, bad language, nudity, etc., which has had an adverse affect on morality throughout the world. Do not mislead yourself into believing that you are above being tempted. Many a devout Christian has ever been brought to his knees for foolishly believing this!

As children of God, it should be important to us that we please Him in all ways. Although we know that we are not immune to sin, and that there will be times that our sin nature wars against our spirit, it is our desire to avoid stepping outside the perimeters of God's will for us. We should be willing to make every effort to know and adhere to that Divine will. The Bible provides so much information regarding the topic of sexual sin and God's view on it that it would be difficult, if not downright impossible for any Christian to justify his/her refusal to live by the guidelines that God has set forth for our sexual gratification. God made certain that His guidelines would be clear and concise. There is no ambiguity about where He draws the line, even in cases where it is not directly addressed. Good Scriptural knowledge will allow those seeking God's heart to discern what is and is not sexual sin.

The Apostle Paul, in his letters to the church of Ephesus tells Christ's followers that we are to be imitators of God. He says to them (and us), "But do not let immorality or any impurity or greed even be named among you, as is proper among saints;...." In 1 Cor. 6:13 Paul says, ".......For the body is not for immorality but for the Lord; and the

Lord is for the body." In verse 15, Paul asks, "Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take away the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? May it never be!" Verse 18 says that we are to "Flee immorality.

Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body."

Although there may be times when you will be tempted by the lure of improper sexual passion, bear in mind these words from Scripture to help you resist the temptation, (1 Cor. 6: 19, 20) "Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price; therefore glorify God in your body." Paul is saying that Jesus' blood on the cross purchased us and made us holy with Him. We can no longer claim the right to do what we desire with our bodies because we gave up that right when we invited Him to be our Savior and Lord. Our bodies are now a sanctified dwelling place for both Christ and the Holy Spirit. You would not deliberately vandalize or desecrate God's place of residence, would you? You wouldn't even consider the idea of toilet-papering his yard or soaping His windows would you, even though society views it merely as harmless fun? Engaging in sexual immorality is no different than trashing God's property! Think about it.

The Apostle Paul's advice to the Thessalonians was good counsel for the early Christians and remains worthy advice for modern day Christians as well. He wrote, "For you know the commandments we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you know how to possess your own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God." We are being told to exercise control over our sexual desires. To put it bluntly, Paul is saying, "Listen up folks, if you truly

want to cultivate God's esteem, keep your legs crossed and your zippers zipped! Put out the flame, don't dishonor His name."

In conclusion, I would like to restate what I said earlier. God has set forth specific

guidelines on human sexuality that were designed to protect His people and promote a greater capacity for sexual pleasure when we adhere to those guidelines. God has set apart marriage between one man and one woman as the only acceptable and honorable

venue in which we may seek sexual gratification with another person. Sex outside of marriage is forbidden, as is adultery, pornography, homosexuality, incest and bestiality

and other perversions. God promises that there will be serious consequences for those who practice such things. God will not remain in fellowship with those who choose to live outside of His will and eternal damnation will be the judgment of those who persist in doing so.

If you have engaged in any form of sexual immorality in the past or are currently involved in doing so, do not be discouraged. There is hope and a promise for you through the work Jesus did for you on the cross! Repent of your sin and turn away from it. If you ask God to forgive you, He will be faithful to do so. We have His word on this in 1 John, Chapter 1, verse 9 which reads, " If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." When God cleanses us from our sins, it means that He completely and forever removes them from us (the sin never occurred) and we stand before Him with a totally clean slate.

You are pure! You may no longer have virgin flesh but God says that you are a virgin in spirit! And spirit always holds trump over flesh in God's deck of cards, no matter how the cards have been dealt. As a blood-bought child of the Lord, regardless of when or how you have sinned, you are holding a winning hand! Don't throw it away. Repent. God loves you. He wants you to play the game to win.

Hallelujah! The next time you get the urge to use your mouth, hands or body in any way that dishonors the Lord, make a decision to use them to honor Him instead! Lift your hands to the heavens, let your mouth sing praises to God because He loves you so graciously, and let your body reflect the presence of Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, who dwell within you!