Good Girl Vs. Pretty Girl

It's very common in young adult novels, sitcoms, romantic comedies, and pop music videos. An average-looking girl with a good heart falls in love with a guy, but the guy's in a relationship with a gorgeous girl, who's usually also mean and full of herself. The audience roots for the average girl, no matter how invasive to the relationship she becomes, and eventually the guy dumps that plastic witch for the nice girl and the audience is happy.

Womanhood is chock full of dichotomies: nice and mean, ugly and pretty, fat and skinny, and the big one, virginal and slutty. Pop culture seems to merge them in order to create female protagonists and antagonists. The protagonist is "average" looking - Hollywood average of course, not average average, nothing that can't be fixed by putting her in a dress, letting her hair cascade down her back, and taking off her classes. She's also sweet, smart, often a virgin especially if she's a teenager, and totally deserving of a good relationship, but guys pass her over for more attractive girls. The guy she wants is with her antagonist, who is prettier than her, and also happens to be a nasty whore.

The reverse situation, when an average girl's boyfriend captures the heart of a prettier girl, is a nightmare. The pretty girl is still the bad girl, a conniving thief just trying to steal another girl's boyfriend. If she kisses the guy, or worse, gets sexual with him, she's a whore who seduced another girl's boyfriend, and of course the guy is shallow for picking the pretty girl over the average girl. How dare he? But wait, if a guy cheats on his pretty girlfriend with an average-looking girl, audiences still cheer, and only fear for the average girl's safety if the pretty girl finds out. After all, that's the relationship the audience wants to see, so if the guy's unfaithful, it's all right if he's kissing the "right" girl and breaking the "wrong" girl's heart in the process.

This dichotomy carries over into real life. When an attractive girl's boyfriend is coveted by a less attractive girl, the girlfriend becomes the enemy. She's suddenly seen as an evil force standing in the way of a perfectly nice girl's chance at true love. The guy in the relationship is expected to leave the pretty girl for, or cheat on her with, the less attractive girl. Because we all know the less attractive the girl, the sweeter, smarter, purer, and in general a better person and therefore better girlfriend she is. The prettier the girlfriend is in comparison, the meaner, dumber, and more promiscuous she's assumed to be, and therefore the "wrong" girl for the guy to be with.

The message those movies send out may help the self-esteem of most girls, and tell girls that personality and brains are what really matter, but they put pretty girls in a terrible light. The other message no one notices, but does seem to reach people, is that girls who are pretty and date the guys average girls crush on are bad girls, and can't possibly also be nice, smart girls who happen to be pretty as well who may not actually deserve to be cheated on.

No one considers the pretty girl's feelings. Probably because she's more angry with the average looking girl in the end, and probably because she's acted so horribly in the movie, daring to want her boyfriend to be faithful and telling the average girl to back off, that she deserves to have her heart broken - or that she's so evil she doesn't have a soul to be crushed. If she does get the guy in the end, only her friends are happy for her In reality, a pretty girl can feel pain, and may not be nasty enough to "deserve" a broken heart. In the end of the story, whether fictional or real, there's a girl who loses out, and maybe it's time someone in the audience sympathizes with her.