Granola Bars Are Awesome

As I sit here in my comfy chair that I bought from Bed Bath & Beyond for the dirt-cheap price of $19.99, and as I feed Harvest Cheddar Sun Chips into my craving tummy, I think about all of the other lovely cheap things there are to enjoy in this lifetime. I think of Ramen Noodles and their indispensible quality of getting college students through their poverty-stricken life in dorm rooms. I think of Easy Mac, and how easy it really is to make that mac. I think of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Basically, I think of a lot of food. But the one thing that sticks out the most on this topic, I believe, is a granola bar.

Granola bars are amazing.
They come in all shapes and sizes. Imagine a really, really long granola bar. I'm thinking... 20 feet? Glorious. I'm not really sure what other shapes they come in other than, you know, a bar. But I'm positive there is more to this granola bar than we really think.

Without granola bars, what would you eat in the morning when you only have two minutes to get to work? You'd probably feel really discouraged, and would swing your front door open and walk out in a tiff. That's what granola bars are here for. They're here to get your days started on the right foot.

Granola bars are love in the shape of a bar
Every day, or at least almost every day, I fight the urge to become a scientist. That way I could discover all of the things a granola bar really is. I mean, they come in chocolate chip, peanut butter, peanut butter chocolate chip, cookies & cream, cookies & cream & peanut butter, and a plethora of others. But I wonder what's in the soul, the very essence of the granola bar?

I can tell you one thing that doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out, though. Granola bars are love. Yes, love. If I were a hippy, I would throw granola bars onto the steps of congress and expect them to get the picture. While they soothe your palette with their appetizing goodness, they speak to you on their way down to their stomach, telling you it's going to be O.K., and they'll always be there for you (as long as you keep eating them to where you never fully digest their contents, but that's a conversation for another day).

Now, the granola bars aren't really speaking, obviously. Maybe it's just me, but I feel like the granola bar machines that make and package each and every granola bar for my consumption specifically design these bars with the exact properties that equal the love I get from my family back at home.

The Final Word
I hope this has persuaded you to love granola bars just as much as I do. Now, I've ventured over to my pantry, and I've peeled away the foil packaging that lies between me and the granola bar I was destined to eat from my beginning. Tastes better every time.