Guide to Slayer Albums: The Slaytanic Slaughter Begins

Slayer will crush you at all volumes, but to really experience an authentic Slayer slaughtering it's gotta be way too loud.

In fact, a great scientist coined a term, calling the mad energy produced in living creatures exposed to Slayer's music the "Slayer Slaughter Effect."

This great scientist proved in a series of studies how the Slayer Slaughter Effect rises in direct proportion to elevated volume levels. Interestingly enough, that scientist was myself and the experiments were conducted in my apartment as I completely wrecked it listening to Slayer at maximum volume.

Hell Awaits

Slayer has nine total studio albums, and many other crazy releases, but I'm hitting the high points here. So we'll start with Hell Awaits.

Hell Awaits is noted as Slayer's most progressive recording, paving the way to the distinct Slayer sound.

That creepy backwards intro on the title track has scared the pants out of tons of kids sitting in their rooms, so make sure it's late and dark to get the full experience.

Reign in Blood

If you only own one Slayer record, this is probably it. Notice I didn't say this is the only Slayer record you should get, but it's what most people are familiar with. Kerrang! magazine called this "the heaviest album of all time," and it's a real punch in the gonads to listen to.

"Reborn" is one of my favorites on this record.

South of Heaven

Slayer slowed this one down, and thank God for that. Think of this as a breather, kind of a seventh inning stretch, because this is about as mellow as Slayer gets. They slowed this record a bit because they said they knew Reign in Blood could not be topped, and they wanted to keep people guessing. The somewhat-slowness of this record makes for a really creepy vibe.

"Ghosts of War" is another of my favorite Slayer songs, and it's a great song to listen to when you're falling asleep. Yeah, right.

Seasons in the Abyss

Seasons in the Abyss is one of a handful of albums stickered with a Parental Advisory label even though the lyrics contain virtually no profanity. Slayer's so insane they would sound offensive if they sung in Pig Latin.

"War Ensemble" makes its way onto almost every mix tape I make for my daily driving. I can't say it makes for a safe drive, but it sure makes for an interesting one.

God Hates Us All

Henry Rollins describes working out while listening to this record via headphones. It culminates with him screaming the lyrics and totally freaking out the other dudes having their own personal workouts. This one will do that to you! If you ever need to vent some frustration, there's nothing like God Hates Us All.

Christ Illusion

Slayer's newest release, and finally they've got their original drummer back, Mr. Dave Lombardo. Lombardo last played on Seasons in the Abyss, and I totally missed his drumming on the three albums that he sat out. Two songs from Christ Illusion won Grammy Awards for "Best Metal Performance." Not bad for 25 years' worth of sonically destroying the planet.