Hannah Montana: The Movie Film Review

1 hr 40 mins

Starring: Miley Cyrus, Billy Ray Cyrus, Emily Osment, Jason Earles, Mitchel Musso, Lucas Till, Vanessa Williams, Peter Gunn, Melora Hardin, Margo Martindale, Barry Bostwick

Directed by: Peter Chelsom

MPAA Rating: G

Rating: ** stars (out of 4 stars)

Nowadays, one cannot imagine being a parent of a 'tween girl and both adult and child not having the opportunity to check out countrified cutie Miley Cyrus on her incredibly popular Disney Channel series Hanna Montana. Well, Miley's pop cultural sensationalism through Disney television has certainly paid off dividends for the fictionalized teenaged Tennessee-native titan Miley Stewart not to mention the youthful, bubbly singer-actress that portrays the sassy Disney-esque diva.

Naturally, Disney knows when to tap into a potential "kiddie movement" and the Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana phenomenon was an inevitable meal ticket to gleefully explore and/or exploit. In addition to the 3-D concert movie that championed the cause for Miley Mania recently it is no wonder that the conception for Hannah Montana: The Movie was ushered in for the enthusiastic tots to endure with indiscriminate giddiness. Obviously, legions of Miley Cyrus's ardent followers would pay to see their hayseed heroine read a telephone book. Unfortunately, Hannah Montana: The Movie plays like a cornball extension of Miley's terminally cutesy televised vehicle of the same name. This scattershot sketch of a movie pretty much suffocates whatever charming quirkiness Miley's alter ego Hannah Montana displays on the Disney Channel boob tube.

For those not familiar with the whole Hannah Montana scenario here's the premise: "regular girl" Miley Stewart lives with her manager-father Bobby Ray (Miley's real-life father Billy Ray Cyrus) and brother Jackson (Jason Earles) in the sunny beach region of Los Angeles. She is constantly in the company of best friend/sidekick Lilly (Emily Osment). Little do folks know (other than her family and best pal of course) is that typical teen Miley is actually musical icon Hannah Montana whom she masquerades as in deceptive blonde wig and showy clothes.

Anyway, one of the running gags is a flustered Bobby Ray trying to keep his superstar songbird-of-a-daughter grounded from the fame that surrounds her "other" celebrated identity. Poor Bobby Ray isn't as successful in keeping the spoiled starlet from getting a big head this time around. As a result, he insists on taking Miley back to their Tennessee farming roots to get her away from the lavish lifestyle that's ruining her "simple way of thinking and humbleness". Besides, it's her grandmother's birthday and Miley needs to attend her party as a courtesy celebration.

Thus, the ungrateful Miley complains until she finally reaches the family's idyllic farm on the scenic Tennessee landscape. Gradually, Miley becomes receptive to the down-home way of living and learns to appreciate the gorgeous countryside canvas. Conveniently, Miley strikes up a romance with attractive farm hand Travis (Lucas Till) and takes to the country chores like an overheated duck to water. In fact, widowed Daddy Dearest Bobby Ray manages to find a love of his own in pretty farming employee Lorelai (Melora Hardin). The danger in both father and daughter getting close to these love interests is that the secret about Miley's Hannah Montana persona may be exposed if the pair is not careful about their respective dalliances.

Invariably, more chaos ensues for Miley and Bobby Ray. The synthetic plot thickens as a bothersome British tabloid reporter (Peter Gunn) is hot on the trail of finding out the sordid details behind the so-called real Hannah Montana. As if this annoying gossipmonger isn't enough of a potential distraction, Miley/Hannah must take on the ruthless presence of an unctuous real-estate developer (Barry Bostwick) looking to disturb the beauty of a picturesque meadow in favor of building a mall and clunky apartment complexes. This sets up the foundation for the charitable Hannah Montana to "save the day" by throwing one of her epic concerts in an effort of financially combating the misfit businessman's ominous constructional transactions.

Director Peter Chelsom uneventfully concocts this whole trivial slaphappy affair as a nutty enterprise drenched in the spirit of a nonsensical slapstick piece. Screenwriter Daniel Berendsen connects this loopy narrative with all the ability of a fifth-grader inflicted with ADD. After awhile, Miley's constant comedic wardrobe changing becomes more monotonous than merry-minded. The revolving cheap gags and cheesy musical numbers only enhance the pseudo-silliness that persists. All the manufactured shenanigans are tacked on clumsily for the forced thrill of having Cyrus's Hannah Montana purposely belt out aimless tunes. Embarrassingly, Miley/Hannah is erratically pulled back-and-forth like some deranged game of tug-of-war, especially when dealing with the town's opportunistic mayor wanting a piece of the voiced vixen. As for Billy Ray Cyrus, his acting in this crayon-oriented costume caper is about as stiff as an Eskimo's exposed middle finger during a major snowstorm.

Predictably, a formulaic flick such as Hannah Montana: The Movie relies on notable faces and cameo appearances to "sweeten the pot". Vanessa Williams is on board as the exasperated publicist for Hannah Montana that can't seem to control her under-aged pop star client (witness Hanna's tirade when scuffling over a pair of shoes with former model/talk show host Tyra Banks). Country music colleagues Taylor Swift and Rascal Flatts are figured into the mix to support the Cyruses on this dippy and disjointed venture.

Again, pre-teen girls will eat up the shallow big-screen by-the-dot antics as featured tediously in Hannah Montana: The Movie. Miley Cyrus has probably had better situational romps on her heralded Disney Channel show than displayed in this flaccid feature-length flick designed to capitalize on her enormous celebrity clout. The small-sized Hannah Montana is tolerable in episodic doses courtesy of a quaint and quirky showcase for Cyrus to demonstrate her inherent on-stage charisma. The super-sized Hannah Montana, however, is a baby-faced bore in search of an ego-inflated platform for her cliched bubble-gum bravura.

Sadly, it's not the best of both worlds for Miley Cyrus or Hannah Montana in this jagged juvenile farce.