Have an Anti-Valentine's Day Celebration

Christmas was just around the corner. New Year's was just around the corner. Now Valentine's Day is right around the corner.

Next month, millions of people will fill the local card shops in search of the right Valentine's Day card for that someone special.

But your in no mood for it this year, or next year. Maybe your never in the mood for Valentine's Day.

Globally, Valentine's Day is celebrated in the United States, France, Mexico, Canada, Great Britain and Australia. Interestingly enough, it is not celebrated in Italy. So there, you have the Italians on your side.

When Feb. 14 comes around the cover of your Valentine's Day greeting card reads, "I'm so happy we're both looking for the same thing." The inside says "Someone else."

Maybe your single. Maybe you just broke up with that someone special. Oh yea and remember, we are in a bad economy. You just don't have a lot of money to spend. Do something simple. Send them a box of Bittersweet candy.

Nothing says it like those little heart shaped candies with sayings like "WE HAD PLANS," or "I"M BROKE," or "U LEFT SEATUP" or "TRADIN U IN."

Need some other ideas on how to celebrate your Anti-Valentine's Day?

1.) Play the song "Love Stinks" by the J. Geils Band over and over again.

2.) Make a batch of broken heart shaped cookies or heart shaped cookies with black food coloring. Oh hell, just eat the raw cookie dough and forget making the cookies.

3.) Buy a cheap t-shirt, a cheap set of magic markers, and write Anti-Valentine's Day slogans on it. Everything has to be cheap, remember we're in a bad economy, save your money.

4.) Remove the covers from your romance novels, mount them on poster board, display them on your front lawn and invite your local gang members to come by and vandalize them with spray paint.

5.) Go to your local grocery store and take an Anti-Valentine's Day card and place it in someone's cart when their not looking and walk away... FAST!!

6.) Make a heart shaped pinata filled with red roses then smash the heck out of it.

7.) Log-on the Anti-Valentine's Day Forum and voice your opinion.

8.) Stop by your local department store and put an Anti-Valentine's Day card on layaway. They'll get the message.

Whatever you do for your Anti-Valentine's Day celebration, be safe, be unhappy, be alone, and have a good time doing it.