Having Children Present at a Birth: What You Should Know

The birth of a new baby is a wonderful event for a big brother or sister. But you may be wondering if you should bring your older child to the birth of your new baby. If you're not certain, there are some things you should consider if you plan on your new baby's sibling at the birth.

How Old is the Sibling?

Young children, less than seven or eight years old, may not be mature enough to see their new baby brother or sister be born. Births are messy and seeing their mother's blood may upset them. There is also the possibility that their mom may yell, scream or curse. This also may upset them. You may want to consider having your older child at the hospital while their mom labors, but have them leave the room for the actual delivery of their new brother or sister

Prepare the Sibling for the Birth

Have your older child watch videos, read books or watch the discovery channel so they have an idea of what to expect from the birth. Tell them about their birth and share any pictures you have.

Many birthing facilities now offer sibling classes for children who will be at the birth. Videos and discussions are geared for children to let them know what to expect. If your hospital doesn't offer one, ask your childbirth educator if she knows of a class or a book that would help your older child prepare for the birth of their baby brother or sister.

Have an Extra Adult at the Birth

Many hospitals require an extra adult to be at the birth whose only job it is to care for any siblings. This adult should not be expected to do any labor support or coaching. The extra adult should make sure your older child eats, drinks, rests and has plenty to do for down time. The adult should be prepared to take the sibling out of the room at a moment's notice. A good person for this job may be a grandparent or a favorite aunt or uncle.

Allow Children to Leave

If your older child gets bored or overwhelmed, it's important they have the option to leave the laboring room. They should leave with a responsible adult. You should never allow a child to wander around a hospital searching for the waiting room or vending machines without adult supervision.

Pack a Sibling Bag

Have the sibling pack a special bag that is just theirs. This bag should contain plenty of stuff for the sibling to do such as books, puzzles, video games and coloring books. Don't forget any special comfort items such as blankets or stuffed animals if your older child should want to rest. Your sibling bag should also contain a sweatshirt or jacket and favorite snacks and juices.

Placement of the Sibling at the Birth

If you want to have your older child at the birth, consider where they will stand during the delivery. Siblings should never be at the foot of the bed during the actual delivery of their baby brother or sister. Seeing the baby crown may be difficult for your child. Siblings may find it less intimidating to be next to their mom's head, maybe holding her hand. Putting the sibling next to their mom's head will also keep them out of the way of birthing facility's personnel.