"Headless Horseman": A DVD Movie Review

I have been in search of a good scary movie for about a month now. I've come across disgusting movies, gruesome movies, horrific movies, and outrageous movies. However, I haven't been able to find a good, old-fashioned scary movie. I don't think they exist any longer.

My latest discovery, the 2007 version of "Headless Horseman," appeared to have possibilities from the story synopsis. However, none of those possibilities were realized.

This version of story moves it away from its New England roots into the Midwest. That should have been the first warning that the film wasn't going to honor anything about the Washington Irving's well known prose. The only thing the two stories have in common is the horseman himself and, of course, his penchant for removing heads.

A group of kids on their way to Halloween party decide to take a short cut through an almost abandoned village. However, along the poorly marked dirt road, an open bear trap wreaks havoc on the tires of their vehicle leaving them stranded.

As luck would have it, while the kids stand around trying to decide what to do next, a young farm girl drives up in a tow truck. She tells them that her father's shop is just around the corner and that he can fix the tires in no time at all. Of course they agree to go with her.

It doesn't take long, once they get to the village, for the kids to figure out that they are in deep trouble. The villagers are more than strange. They are ominous and seem intent on scaring the group half to death.

After they discover that their vehicle has been dismantled rather than fixed, they try to walk on to the next village. However, that isn't allowed as they are unceremoniously herded back to the town by the local sheriff.

After a bit of research they find out that every seven years a headless horseman appears in the village. He is in search of six fresh heads. If he is able to collect them all, he will complete his pact with the devil and be able to roam free all of the time. The kids, of course, were brought to the village to present the horsemen with sufficient heads to meet his needs.

Will the kids escape, in part or in whole? Will the horseman become immortal and be able to wreak havoc 365 days a year? Frankly, I doubt if anyone really cares but I won't answer those questions in the event that someone wants to find out for themselves.

The cast, with the exception of Richard Moll, is made up of unknown actors who will likely remain that way. Their acting isn't just poor. It is down right bad. What Moll is doing in this film is anyone's guess. Perhaps with his size and appearance, he doesn't get a lot of acting opportunities. Still, this is one that he should have turned down. It destroys what little credibility he once held as an actor.

The screenplay, written by Zachary Weintraub, is poorly conceived and even more poorly written. I hate to say that of a fellow writer. It feels disloyal, but I have to call them as I see them.

Anthony Ferrante directs, or at least tries to. His attempt isn't very impressive. I would tell him not to give up his day job.

This film is bad. No it is actually worse than that. However, I quite frankly can't find a word that is negative enough to describe it. It gets 0 out of five stars.

Rating scale used:
0 = Stinker. Don't waste the money!
1 = Bad. Rent it at your own risk.
2 = Below Average. See it only if you have time to kill.
2.5 = Average. A toss up.
3 = Good. Worth a looksee.
3.5 = Very Good. I recommend it.
4 = Excellent. Don't miss it!
4.5 = Outstanding. What are you waiting for?
5 = Destined to become a classic. You will be sorry if you don't see it.