Heaven and Hell

The day 2,000 H-Bombs fell,
Some went to Heaven and some went to Hell.
The lines were long, all waited patiently,
To learn outcome of their ultimate destiny.

Who would go up, who would go down?
Some souls smiled, others wore a frown.
There were Christians there, Muslims too,
And here and there an occasional Jew.

The Billionaire souls offered part of their riches
To get up front through contractual switches.
I don't know when the first punch was thrown,
To this day no offender is known.

Hellish riots broke out on the lines this day.
Most of them fought but some ran away.
Kicking and biting and scratching ensued.
Some souls hired Lawyers, some souls got sued.

Demons descended into the fray.
Angels joined in, their swords on display.
The second Celestial War did begin.
Which side would lose and which side would win.

Many souls joined in on a unified chorus
"Can't we all just live together no matter what lies before us?"
6 billion souls all charged straight through the gate
Battered the ramparts and ran to their fate.

Hell or Heaven either one would be fine
Compared to the wait on this asinine line.
No Heaven or Hell exist any more
Just one single afterlife on two different floors.