Heaven's Résumé

Prominent businesswoman, Mrs. Paulsen, passed away and found herself outside the pearly gates of Heaven. St. Peter stepped out to greet her and she handed him her resume.

"Hmmm," said St. Peter as he looked over the document. Then he smiled at Mrs. Paulsen and said, "Would you please step to the side?"

A bewildered Mrs. Paulsen did as she was told. She watched as men and women after her handed forth his or her own resume and was granted entry through the pearly gates. After watching for some time as person after person was allowed to enter the gates, Mrs. Paulsen's patience began to wear a little thin. She marched up to St. Peter. "Excuse me," she said.

St. Peter turned to her and smiled. "Yes, Mrs. Paulsen?"

"You've allowed hundreds of people to enter the gates and I've been waiting very patiently," she said, but her tone was one of someone who was not accustomed to waiting.

"One moment," said St. Peter. He turned to another angel and said, "Gabriel, I need to speak with Mrs. Paulsen. I'll be a few moments. Will you be all right until I return?"

"Certainly, Peter," Gabriel said as he allowed another person to enter the gates of Heaven.

St. Peter guided Mrs. Paulsen a few steps away from the line of people, taking with him Mrs. Paulsen's resume. "You see, Mrs. Paulsen, your resume needs further review."

Mrs. Paulsen was quite taken aback by this statement. "Further review? But why? All of my accomplishments are listed there."

St. Peter referred to the document in his hand. "Yes. I see you were CEO of a large company."

"And I made them quite a lot of money while I was there," Mrs. Paulsen said. "I worked my way up to that position, all the way from the bottom."

"And left quite a few people at the bottom, as I understand," St. Peter commented.

"That isn't on my resume," Mrs. Paulsen said.

"Ah, but we must be able to read between the lines of everyone's resume, Mrs. Paulsen."

Unfettered, Mrs. Paulsen continued. "I went to church every Sunday. I tithed twenty-five percent of my income!"

"A lovely gesture, I am sure," said St. Peter. "And those who tithe are to be commended for it. That is a manmade invention, a manmade necessity. We don't put much stock into money up here."

"Then I'm not sure I understand what the problem is with my resume." Mrs. Paulsen bordered on indignance. "I built an empire for my company. I ran a very tight ship and not a single dime was wasted."

"Yes, you built an empire for your company, Mrs. Paulsen. But do you know how many broken human spirits you built it upon?"

Mrs. Paulsen's face went utterly blank. "What do you mean? I had to keep people in line! Otherwise, the work never would have gotten done!"

"Oh, yes. The bottom line is always the money, isn't it? In your zealotry to "keep people in line" as you say, you ended up suppressing and oppressing their natural exuberance for life. You intimidated them into being so afraid of losing their livelihoods that it shook them to their very foundations. And those who resisted your intimidation were treated far worse than you yourself expect to be treated." St. Peter hesitated, then sighed. "No, I am afraid you may not be what we are looking for here."

Mrs. Paulsen was aghast. "Well, if I am not what you are looking for, then pray tell what are you looking for?" She looked along the line of waiting people. "Some of these people have been on the streets. You can tell by the way they are dressed."

St. Peter looked at those people Mrs. Paulsen was seeing. "Yes. Forgotten souls, most of them. Ignored and overlooked by those more fortunate than they. Including yourself, Mrs. Paulsen."

Mrs. Paulsen placed her hands on her hips. "Well, why are they more deserving of getting into Heaven than I am? Why don't their resumes need further review?"

St. Peter turned to the table behind him, stacked with resumes and picked up a few. He handed them to Mrs. Paulsen for her perusal.

She quickly flipped through them, the crease in her forehead deepening with each page she read. "All this man did was rescue a cat from a burning building!" she said. "And he was a homeless vagrant at the time!"

"Yes," said St. Peter. "The cat was the sole companion to an elderly woman who also escaped the burning building. Without her beloved cat, she would have lived only a few more miserable months instead of several more happy years."

"This man passed over a promotion to a co-worker?" Mrs. Paulsen said, a look of confusion on her face.

"The woman who got the promotion was pregnant with her second child when her husband was killed in Desert Storm. The man was quite happy where he was and felt his salary was compensation enough for he and his wife. And the young woman was certainly qualified for the promotion."

Mrs. Paulsen handed the resumes back to St. Peter. "I still do not understand why my resume is under scrutiny."

St. Peter took a few steps to his left. "Come and look, Mrs. Paulsen."

Mrs. Paulsen stepped to St. Peter's side. St. Peter waved his hands and the clouds parted. Before them was a scene occurring on earth.

"That's my old boss!" Mrs. Paulsen said. "And that's his assistant, Habersham with him. What are they talking about?"

"Listen," said St. Peter.

"It's a shame about Paulsen," Habersham said.

"Yes," said the boss. "It is a shame. But now that she's gone, we can set about putting things right again."

"What do you mean?" Habersham said. "She made us a lot of money."

"Oh, yes," sighed the boss, "she made us a lot of money, all right. But the office is a shambles. We have too few employees, they're overworked and they're tired. And they seem to be enemies against each other, every single one of them. The profit is nice, I'll admit, but I know what it's like to work someplace you hate to go every day. It isn't fair to the employees. Besides, the happier the employee, the more productive the employee."

"What do we need to do, sir?"

"Do we still have any resumes of some of the employees Mrs. Paulsen fired? I recall a handful of them who loved working here at the time and a couple of them in particular had some really good ideas for boosting morale in the office."

"I'm not certain, sir, but I'll look into it."

The boss shook his head sadly. "Yes, Mrs. Paulsen said she would build me an empire. But she didn't promise it would be a pleasant one. It's up to us to rebuild it if we have to take it back to scratch, Habersham."

St. Peter waved his hand and the clouds reformed

Mrs. Paulsen stood with her mouth open. "He wasn't happy with the empire I built? But it took me so long to get it to where it was."

"An empire built upon broken human spirits does not stand strong and does not stand for long, Mrs. Paulsen," St. Peter said. He handed her resume back to her. Across the top, in large red letters was stamped the single word, 'REJECTED.'

Mrs. Paulsen stared at the word for a moment. "Do you mean you are sending me to hell because of my work?"

St. Peter raised his eyebrows. "Oh, no, no, no, no, no, Mrs. Paulsen. Hell is reserved for the truly heinous. No, you are merely being returned with the hope that you will learn something."

"And what it is I am supposed to learn?" Mrs. Paulsen demanded.

"That it is how you treat people which matters most, Mrs. Paulsen. Not the empires you build or the money you make, whether for yourself or for others. How you treat your fellow people is what we are most concerned with here."

With that, St. Peter returned his attention to Gabriel and the line of waiting people and Mrs. Paulsen was gone.

"How many times does that make?" Gabriel asked with a smile.

"I believe this was her ninth time," St. Peter sighed. "Ah, but maybe ten times' a charm, eh, Gabriel?"