Help and Hope for Adults Going Back to School This Fall

Are you going back to school this fall after a long stint in the "real world"?

If so, you might be feeling anxious about suddenly having to deal with professors, classmates, tests, assignments, textbooks, even finding a parking spot and learning your way around campus. You'll be in good company, at least. More than half of today's college students are non-traditional learners, not teenagers living in dorms while Mom and Dad pay the bills. These determined folks recognize the need for college degrees and up-to-the-minute skills in today's competitive job market, and juggle their roles as student with work, families, and other responsibilities.

If you're going to become one of them, relax. The first few days may be a bit scary and filled with revelations (yes, many professors still wear tweed jackets; yes, you'll probably sit in the same dreadful desks with rock hard seats and awkward attached writing tables). But after the first few weeks, the shock will wear off, and by spring semester, you'll almost be normal again. To help make the adjustment process a little faster and easier, here are some tips.

*Expect textbooks to be outrageously expensive. It's not unusual for one book to cost $100, and you may have to purchase several books for one class. Half.com sells a lot of used textbooks for less, so see if you can get your books there before trying the college bookstore. If you can't find any books you can afford, anywhere, as a last resort the college library might have the ones you need available for checkout.

*Carve out time in your schedule for homework. You're going to have to do a lot of reading. It's much easier to keep up by doing some of it every day than it is to cram right before a test - plus, you'll remember more. If you have a family with older children, let them know you need their support in finding quiet, undisturbed time at home. See if you can negotiate a schedule that you all can live with, and ask them to take on some of your chores. If fits are thrown, remind them that everyone will benefit once you have your degree and make more money -- and assure partners and kids that you will be there for all the most major family moments (more about handling this later). If your children are young, you may need to have someone take care of them for you so you can either get your work done at home or at the library. Having peace and quiet in which to study is critical - few people can learn anything with constant interruptions from others or TVs, music, and conversations blaring in the background.

*If a loved one tries to sabotage you, get professional help. Sadly, sometimes partners are threatened by the whole college experience. This shows up as a lot of complaints, expressions of doubt that it's worth it, creating a ruckus when you need to work, refusing to help with childcare, starting arguments, and in the worst cases, verbal and/or physical abuse. You must address this right away! If you're being abused, your life is in danger; if you're being thwarted in other ways, you need professional help to sort out why and what to do about it. Plus, it will be almost impossible to succeed in school with this kind of drama in your life. Contact your local shelter or counseling services for help without delay. And don't let the bad behavior derail you - if you're in a dysfunctional relationship, you especially need that degree.

*Get your school ID as soon as possible, and don't lose it. Oh, it's probably possible to get through college without one, maybe, but it's much easier to just pull it out of your wallet when you need to. Try to memorize your student number, too.

*Expect a lot of technology. Your instructors may use PowerPoint presentations, electronic black boards, online message groups, and more as instructional resources. If you're a technophobe, you'll be confronting your fears head-on. Accept it and move on.

*Don't be offended if the younger students ignore you. On the other hand, don't be surprised if they're friendly or even flirt with you - you just never know. See if there's someone in the class around your age and try to get acquainted. You might be able to help each other with assignments or missed notes down the road, and you can commiserate when you need to.

*Don't be afraid to participate in class. Many professors do notice who participates and who doesn't. Keep your comments short and to the point, and, whatever you do, don't ramble on about how it was back in the day (unless you're in a history class, when it might actually interest people). Don't worry about sounding stupid - you have a lot more life experience and know much more than the kids in the class.

*Make sure you have access to a working computer and printer. Professors are constantly hearing stories about computer crashes and faulty printers on the day papers are due; even if they are nice about it, they're skeptical. Plus, you will create a lot of stress for yourself if you don't have reliable equipment to use. If you don't have a computer at home and can afford it, buy one and learn how to use it right away. Most campuses offer free short courses in all the major software applications.

*Try to get your papers written a week before they're due. This will give you plenty of time to set them aside, then read them again with fresh eyes. Adult students take their grades very personally, knowing they can't blame a poor performance on too much partying and a fabulous social life. You'll get higher grades on your papers if they're done well before the due date.

*Take good notes in class and review them between classes. Don't try to jot down every word a professor utters or that appears on an overhead. Just get the main ideas and save time using your own shorthand (eliminating vowels helps - ys, lk ths!) Then review your notes before the next class meets. Turns out notes actually make more sense (and help you learn the material better) if read between classes. And here's a radical idea: if there's something in the notes you don't understand, ask the professor to clarify it.

*Speaking of professors, they are the same as they ever were, at least in the past 30 years or so. Some are nice, fun, and happy; some are stuffy, dreary, and boring; some are arrogant, intimidating, and rude. You'll encounter instructors who are fascinating, brilliant, and amazingly articulate, and ones who are so hilarious and witty that you wish you knew them in real life (but don't - more on this in a minute). Some may be mumbling and incomprehensible, others radical and challenging, and still others pontificating, smug bores. Some may pile on too much work; some might not give you much at all. You might encounter the best instructor you've ever had or the worst. Regardless, you'll have less frustration if you understand up front that it's your responsibility to get something out of the class. That's right - you. It's possible to learn from even the worst professors, if only by doing their reading assignments. Keep your eye on your goal and don't be upset if your professor is less than dazzling. Even if he or she is insufferable ... just do your work and be glad that semesters are only a few months long.

*Don't get in romantic relationships with your professors, ever, no matter how intriguing they may be. Boundaries between professor and student can get a little fuzzier with adult learners because the age difference is often slight. But when the relationships end and other students and faculty find out about them (and this almost always happens), you'll feel like an idiot. Less likely, but still possible, is that your professor could become a scary stalker, making your college life a nightmare (it's happened more than once). Regardless, it's almost inevitable that you'll end up not wanting to show your face on campus anymore. And you're paying thousands for this? If it's a broken heart, humiliation, or fear you want, start hanging out at your local bar and get it for free.

*One more thought on professors - unless they say not to, send them an e-mail or give them a call at their office if you have to miss class. Ask if there's something you need to know before the next class session. Don't skip any more classes than you can help, but don't deprive yourself and your loved ones of important occasions like kids' plays, an anniversary celebration, trick or treating, or someone's birthday. Also, if you or a family member is really sick or upset about something, stay home. Yes, school is important, but some things are more important - like your health and the people you love.

*Use commute time to listen to study tapes. This is especially helpful if you have to memorize a lot of new terminology. If you can't buy any, make them yourself by reading the words and the definitions you need to learn into a recorder. Then play your tape or DVD while you drive to work, take the train, or even when you're exercising at home.

*About tests: preparing for them won't be so bad if you keep up with the reading and are regularly reviewing your notes. Ideally, you'll just be skimming over the material you've been looking at all along, rather than seeing it for the first time. You'll remember it better if you study in short bursts of 20-30 minutes or so, rather than for hours at a stretch. And be sure to study in a quiet place where you concentrate.

*If you find your heart pounding and your palms sweating once you start taking a test, take some deep breaths and answer only the easiest, most obvious questions. Gradually you'll return to Earth and be able to think again, and some of the "hard" questions you skipped will become easy. Once in a while during the test, tell yourself you're doing a good job and to hang in there.

*Another test tidbit: if you don't know the answer to a multiple choice question, don't pick the answer that's something completely unfamiliar - it's probably not correct and is something your professor just made up for the test.

*And still another: if the test is essay, in the first couple of sentences, directly answer the question rather than writing some flowery introduction. That way if you run out of time, you've at least shown you know the answer. In fact, it's a good general policy to avoid flowery introductions whenever you're doing college writing.

*Last test hint: do an Internet search for "mnemonic devices" to see if there are some new tricks you can learn to help you remember terminology.

*Finally, for tests or anything else at college, use visualization techniques to imagine yourself succeeding. Especially in moments of doubt and despair, it can be help to use the mind's eye to see yourself opening a grade report filled with A's, or in a cap and grown walking across a stage at graduation. Keep reminding yourself that when you are done - and yes, if you just don't quit, that day will come - the rewards will be great.

And there you have it - my best advice for making the transition from world of work and home to that of the college classroom.

A couple last things ...

Adult learners often worry that they've slowed down too much to be successful in school. But in reality, their extensive life experience and commitment to college make them some of the best students out there. They know that school is a privilege, and they probably aren't going to waste their money by skipping classes and not doing their work to party, have sex, sleep late, or watch soap operas and eat cheese curls. They're mature enough to appreciate the college experience and want to get the most out of it that they can. This gives them a tremendous advantage over younger students.

No, instead of faltering when you return to school, you're more likely to find yourself immersed in an incredible intellectual adventure. Your brain will feel fired up as you create new neural pathways and reactivate old ones by absorbing new facts and ideas. The new people and information you encounter will be a fresh breeze blowing through your mind. Very likely, your self-esteem and confidence will shoot up as you discover that you actually enjoy rigorous learning and that you can earn good grades. You're going to find that the world isn't quite what you thought it was, and that you're not quite the person you thought you were, either. Best of all, no one can ever take any of that away from you - or the degree you earn at that end of the journey. All in all, a pretty good investment of your precious time, energy, and money.

See you in class.