Helpful Tips for Selecting Crystals and Stones for a Loved One

Have you had the experience of going shopping for jewelry for a friend or loved one and being overwhelmed by all of the choices? Are you in the rut of buying the same things over and over? Have you given up altogether?

I want to share some tips with you that will make the process easier and more enjoyable. Valentine's Day is right around the corner, but jewelry is the kind of gift that we buy, or invest in for ourselves, all year long. The goal, of course, is to bring home the perfect piece. Best case scenario-we find the perfect thing and the recipient is ecstatic. Worst case-we get frustrated and buy something that we hope "will do". My goal here is to help you avoid the worst case scenario from ever happening again.

In order to make the information germane to the greatest number of people, I am focusing on real semi-precious stones and crystals. If you are buying diamonds, rubies, emeralds or sapphires, you can apply the color theory, but feel secure in the knowledge that it is hard to go wrong buying any of these precious stones. However, it's very hard to beat semi-precious stones and crystals for value, beauty, energy and artisanship.

Artisanship

This refers to the manner in which the stones are presented. Are they set in metal? Are they beads strung on some type of stringing element? Are they wire-wrapped? This is a very important step in choosing your piece and should not be overlooked. The person that you are shopping for, the use of the piece and the quality of the craft are critical to the success of your choice. For instance, an amethyst broach set in 14 karat gold will not be a successful gift if your recipient only wears silver. Likewise, a large funky pendant will not go over well with a person who loves small, conservative pieces. So, knowing something about your receiver is very important.

A person's style is unique to them and the truly thoughtful gift-giver takes the time to register what that style is. Is it funky, conservative, formal, vintage, tribal, asymmetrical, casual, gaudy, bold and adventurous, utilitarian, monochromatic, minimalist? Do they wear different metals or do they stick with one type? How large is the person? A very petite woman and a Junoesque woman should not wear the same jewelry. Often times, larger women require pieces that are proportional to their figures and very small conservative pieces get lost on them. One thing that you should not do is try to match jewelry gifts to an event or job as this boxes-in the wearer and those pieces usually end up relegated to the back of the jewelry box. Let them decided what works for them in each situation, your job is pick a piece that is right for the person.

One last thing about artisanship. Always, always choose the best workmanship that your budget allows. It is far better to buy a smaller, more modest piece that is very well made, than to buy something large and impressive that has cheap, shoddy workmanship. Look at the metal work-is it smooth and well-crafted? Turn the piece in your hand. Is it well-balanced and symmetrical? If it has soldered joints, are they small and well-formed or are they lumpy? If the stone(s) are set in, are the cabochons well done or do they feel loose in the setting? Is the metal clearly stamped with its grade? Sterling silver should be marked "sterling", "SS" or ".925". Gold should be marked by karat, either 10 karat, 14 karat, or 24 karat. Rhodium is a popular metal that is usually anodized onto a lesser grade of silver. Some jewelers like it because it doesn't tarnish and can be buffed to an incredible shine. Just make sure you know that that is what you are getting.

Picking out stones

Now that you have the gift-receiver's style in mind, and you have established a baseline for the artisanship, it's time to think about the stones themselves. Sometimes, that's the easiest part. If you are looking for something in that person's birthstone, you have already done all the work and now you just need to pick out the piece that is going to its new home. The following is a list of birthstones by month. Please note, this is the traditional birthstone list and does not include nouveau choices like cubic zirconia.

January:Garnet signifies trust, truth

February:Amethyst signifies fidelity, healing, a quick wit, royalty

March:Aquamarine signifies the sea, protection for sailors, calmness

April:Diamond signifies eternity

May:Emerald signifies rebirth, foresight, eternal youth

June:Pearl signifies undying love, harmony, peace

July:Ruby signifies the ignition of love, stirs the passions, creates desire

August:Peridot signifies protection from evil, protects you in your dreams

September:Sapphire signifies protection from envy, attracts angelic attention

October:Opal signifies justice, fairness, clear-headedness, a warm heart

November:Topaz (golden) signifies internal warmth, healing of old wounds

December:Turquoise one of the most ancient healing stones on earth

As you may already know, many stones and crystals are used for their healing properties as well as their decorative properties. This is something to keep in mind. You may or may not believe in this theory, but the wearer just might. Stones have also been used for thousands and thousands of years to promote abilities and talents, boost performance, aide in meditations, act as talismans to protect the wearer and as currencies around the world. Let's talk a bit about crystals first.

Crystals are quartz formations and come in a rainbow of colors. There are literally hundreds of books, and opinions, on which crystal to pick for an individual purpose. Unfortunately, like with so many other opinions, some of them vary wildly and can even contradict each other. This can make for a frustrating experience. After twenty-five years of working with stones and healing, I want to simplify this for you and create a rewarding experience that will enable you to choose with confidence. The first "rule" is: choose what you are drawn to. You cannot go wrong with this strategy. Just keep in mind that the stone that you are resonating with may not be something that your receiver is resonating with. At least, not right now. Another way to choose is match the color of the crystal to one of the chakras of the body.

Top of the head=purple, violet

Between the eyes, "third eye"=indigo, deep blue

Throat, mouth=blue, turquoise

Thymus, heart=aqua, blue-green

Diaphragm area, top of the lungs=bright clear true green

Upper abdomen=yellow

Bellybutton, lower abdomen=orange

Between the legs, crotch=red

Behind the knees=smokey brown

Soles of feet and palms of hands=clear

How does this help you choose? Let's say that you are choosing for yourself and you are very shy. Shyness is not a bad quality, but it can hinder you from moving up in your career, working with the public, performing in front of an audience, etc. A good choice for you would be a crystal in either green or yellow (bright clear yellow). This would correspond with the chakras that link us to others and that encourage interpersonal communication. A crystal pendant on a long chain that hung to the solar plexus would be perfect, and could hang on the inside of your clothing if you didn't want it to show. In this way you are harnessing the power of color therapy, crystal therapy and your own incredible energies to begin being more confident in the presence of others.

Semi-precious stones also have a long and glorious history. Some stones are very specific in their uses, like sardonyx for warriors, and others are powerful enough to be used for a multitude of purposes, like amethyst and turquoise. What follows is a simple list of some of the easiest to find stones.

Lapis lazuli-prized by poets and writers, guardian of merchants and craftsman

Rhodinite/Rhodocrosite-guards the heart and kidneys, promotes healthy lungs, attracts

affection and desire

Carnelian-used by troubadors, musicians, poets, aids in digestion and elimination

Onyx-stone of stability, mystery

Hematite-the most important stone for "grounding" an individual, helps keeps the spirit

earthbound, helps balance stress and worry, promotes powerful confidence/self-esteem

Rose quartz-mends broken hearts, attracts love into one's life, promotes a gentle

Spirit, promotes compassion for other souls

Amethyst-connects one with the divine, facilitates understanding/knowledge/personal

growth, revered by cultures all over the earth, opens one's eyes to possibilities

Turquoise-revered by cultures all over the earth, promotes healing throughout the

body, helps a person "speak their truth" when worn close to the thymus/heart chakra

used as a talisman or amulet to help protect the bearer from evil, promotes commun-

ication and clear-headedness

Jade-promotes calmness, communication with self and with others, lung and chi

function, calms anger in others, opens one's eyes in the dreaming world

Aventurine-"patron stone" for adventurers, encourages an intrepid spirit, helps ease

sports injuries and inflammation

Tiger's eye-stone of courage and strength of convictions, promotes faithfulness and

friendship, put a small piece in your belly button to help ward off motion sickness

Malachite-stone of rebirth, renewal, healing the spirit of old wounds and moving

on, encourages fresh outlooks and new visions

Moonstones-a woman's most powerful stone, promotes strong feminine energy, helps

ease menses, connects a woman to the goddess and to universe, inspires the goddess

within, most powerful when used in conjunction with amethyst

Red Jasper-helps diminish menstrual cramps (lay jasper directly on cramping area),

promotes healthy digestion, focuses the mind on sex/passion/lust, encourages regular

satisfying sexlife

Making your choice

You now have the information you need to make a good choice. If you are choosing for yourself, ask yourself what you would like to bring into your life. Do you want to enhance an existing quality? Or, are you looking to bring new energy into your life? Remember, if you see something that you really are drawn to, and it passes the artisanship test, then that piece is for you. As for giving a piece as a gift, remember to keep proportion and artisanship as your parameters. Then, choose stones that add to your loved one's life. And do feel free to tell them why you made the choice that you did. Acknowledge the phrase "It's the thought that counts", because that's what your gift says, ultimately. Include in your gift the reason that you chose what you did. If your loved one is a musician, and you chose a necklace made from carnelian, turquoise and onyx, tell him or her why. More than anything else, this tells them that you have invested in getting to know them and that you have sought out a piece that will inspire and delight them for years to come.