Helping Your Child Make the Transition From Elementary School to Junior High

It's that time of year once again, back to school time. We've all been very busy this past month taking the kids on that last summer vacation of the year, shopping for new school supplies, clothing and back to school shoes. We parents are ready for the few hours of peace and quite we get knowing our kids are in the capable hands of their teachers and the school system. However for me, the start of this school year is bringing some extra stress along with it as my daughter is beginning the dreaded junior high school. This next month will be her transition period between elementary school and her journey into the world of teenagers and all the problems that come along with junior high. During this past summer and my dreaded anticipation for the coming school year, I've talked to many parents I know who have been forced by time, to make this same journey with their kids in the past. They have all informed me that it's normal for a child entering junior high to feel overwhelmed, depressed and just down right miserable. The adjustment from elementary school to junior high, is a huge step in the life of our preteens. They struggle daily to find their way around a new building, to interact with people they don't know in an atmosphere they aren't use to and try to make new friends and fit into the intimidating social circles, desperately aching to find a place where they fit in. And as their parent, we just want to help them, to shield them from the hurt and pain that's sure to come. But transitioning is an adjustment that they must make themselves. Unfortunately we parents can't do it for them, as much as we might wish we could.

Entering the world of teenagers can be very hard on our kids. They have gotten used to the strict regimens, slightly overprotective and indulgent atmosphere in elementary school. When they make the transition to junior high they sometimes have a problem with the amount of freedom they receive, not to mention the requirements and expectations they are expected to meet, not only from teachers but also their peers. This time has even been known to draw many teenagers into a period of depression. Psychologists have suggested that if we see our preteens behavior beginning to change during this time and sense that something just isn't quite right, that we try to talk to them. If that doesn't work, just give it time, because time is all that is very often needed for teenagers to settle in and find where they fit in. Give it a month before you talk to the school counselors. I know that for a parent worrying constantly about their child, a month can seem like forever. In the meantime take a very active interest in your Child's schooling and what's going on In school. Ask them what might make their day go better in school. Doing this sets their own problem solving skills in motion and quite often can lead to them making decisions and taking actions that will immediately change what ever scene is upsetting them. Make sure to always validate their feelings. Ask them how their feeling and if they aren't able to articulate, help them to put their feelings into words. Encourage them to talk about their high school, ask questions and don't settle for the answer typical of most teens, 'it's ok' . Delve a little deeper and encourage them to share their day with you. Express confidence in your child, tell them that they have what it takes to get through high school. Share some of the experiences you had when you were forced to go through that same period. Dig up those embarrassing moments you've chosen to bury and share them with your child. Then they are encouraged and know that many teenagers deal with some of the same problems their going through. Ask your child how you can help her transition period go more smoothly. I can remember my first year of junior high, I dreaded the whole school day just because I hated going into the crowded lunch room and standing there in front of a hundred kids in a packed lunch room not knowing where to sit. Many times I would go though the whole school day starving because I refused to go into the lunchroom to eat. When I shared these feelings with my mom she began making my lunch which I ate outside on the bleachers with the other kids who brought their own lunch. It seems so trivial now, but at the time this was a major cause of unhappiness and worry for me. But when I communicated my feelings with my mom she solved my problem and I also made friends, just by changing where I ate lunch. Maybe there might be a simple answer you can give your child for a problem they may be having. Make sure and ask your child if there's anyone in school who might make her transition period easier or help her to handle a problem. The teachers, principals and counselors are all there to make sure your teen has a happy and productive junior high experience. And they will do everything they can to help them during what they know is a very difficult time, make sure your child knows that. It is also very important that you actively seek to keep them involved in any activities they may enjoy, encourage them to get involved in things at school. Hobbies and extracurricular activities help kids to feel wanted and in control when other aspects of their lives may seem to be spinning crazily. While your using these approaches make sure and keep careful notice to see if their attitude or unhappy behaviors are improving. Encourage them to problem solve while letting them know the confidence you have in their ability to succeed at junior high school. If you don't see any improvement after a month then it's definitely time to call the counselor, as there may be something more going on than just unhappiness with the transition. For more information on helping your child succeed at junior high school visit the parents website.