Helping Families of Children with Cancer

These have to be the most terrifying words a parent can hear -- suddenly their child's future is uncertain.

In Spring 2006, I met Keri Moline while she was doing a book drive for her charity, The Family Pantry. Keri spoke with passion about her cause:

"A friend of mine had a son who was diagnosed with cancer. She was constantly at the hospital with her son, who had to endure intense and aggressive treatment for cancer. The one thing she'd say she needed was food to eat. Sadly, her son lost his battle with cancer, but the experience made me realize there is a need there. The children are well cared for in these situations but who is caring for the parents?"

As Keri and her mother, Ev Simpson, shared stories about children they've met - and lost - and whose parents' lives they've touched, I was brought to tears several times. Theirs is definitely a story to be told.

In early 2003, Keri and a bunch of her friends were talking about how "lucky" they were that sickness hadn't touched on any of them. Two weeks later, Kaelan, the son of a very close friend, was diagnosed with cancer.

Kaelan was an energetic fun-loving boy who suddenly stopped eating and threw up whenever he'd try to. Doctors discovered a cancerous tumor the size of a football in his abdomen. The tumor was removed along with one of his kidneys and an adrenal gland. But because the tumor wasn't encased the cancer spread rapidly. He was given intense and aggressive chemotherapy and radiation treatment to prevent the cancer from spreading further.

Although Kaelan's family lived fairly close to the hospital, it wasn't quite close enough for his mother to be able to leave him so she could eat, clean up and return without fearing she'd be needed or, God forbid, something would happen to Kaelan in her absence. Keri said when she'd visit her friend, the one thing she'd ask for was food - something good but quick so she could still be there for Kaelan.

Keri wondered if other parents were going through this? To Keri's astonishment, there were many. There was a need for someone to supply these parents with nutritious food. When Kaelan lost his brave battle with cancer in May 2004, Keri decided she would help these parents in his name.

Keri and Ev go to the local Food Bank every second Friday to replenish the food supplies Ev stores on shelves in her basement. She and Keri make trips every Monday, Wednesday and Friday to re-stock the tiny cupboard known as The Family Pantry. Items they provide include soups, pasta, cereals, juice, granola bars, canned fruit, puddings, fruit rollups, crackers, meal replacement drinks, coffee and tea. Everything is individual-sized so it's easy to store and easy to prepare. That's the key --- easy, fast but nutritious meals to keep the families going through the rough times.

Keri said the lovely people at the Food Bank stated these families are "one group [the Food Bank] hadn't reached before. These parents are in a situation beyond their control."

The ladies have also started bringing toiletries such as lotions, shampoo, toothbrushes, toothpaste, shavers, etc. Ev said she has friends who've donated items from other cities or countries. She loves to come to the children and say:
"Oh! This is all the way from Las Vegas/Australia/California. It must be special."

A shampoo bottle in the shape of Mickey Mouse or a little bottle of eucalyptus lotion from Australia can be tremendously more valuable than the actual cost of the item. It can provide a story to take everyone away for awhile - away from treatments, away from fear, and away from cancer.

If there are items not available to them one week, Keri and Ev must use their own money to purchase the needed items. They do book drives, have done pedicure party fundraisers as well as fundraisers at Keri's children's school. They continue on whether they have to use their own money or if have help.

Keri gets energy from what she's doing. She shared with me how she "wins over" the children:

"I give the children an important job to do. I tell them they have to make sure Mom (and/or Dad) eat breakfast, lunch and dinner every day and make sure Mom has her coffee or tea in the morning. It's a way of giving the child some control when everything else in their lives is so out of control."
Another fun way to relate to the children is by telling them she'll do her "happy dance" if she comes there and the cupboard is almost empty.

"It's a very silly dance I do for the kids that always makes them laugh." Her Happy Dance has even been known to bring a smile or two the parents' way too.

Keri and Ev's are, in my opinion, and in many others', true angels on earth. They are doing a selfless thing in the name of a wonderful little boy who bravely fought - and lost - his battle with cancer. What touches me the most about Keri and Ev isn't what they do, it's why they do it -- "just because" there's a need.

Before I left our meeting, I turned to Keri and told her how brave she was to be doing this. She turned to me with her big smile and said, "A lot of folks say they can't go into the hospital or, especially, the children's cancer ward. But it gives me energy. I go there - even after a really bad day - and I leave there happy. I realize life isn't so bad. I have a good life with few worries. So, my child didn't sleep last night...no big deal. Some of these kids never sleep or, even worse, never wake up. I leave there every day reminded that life isn't so bad and it's precious. If I can make one person happy by what I'm doing...that's all that counts."

As she walked back to her van, I looked down at a picture of Kaelan she gave me - - without his hair but with a huge smile on his gorgeous face. It is all that counts.

God bless you, Keri and Ev.