Helping a Loved One Cope with Psoriasis

There was a time, many years ago, when I didn't know what psoriasis was or even how to spell it. Even though I had heard of it and knew several of my family members (mostly aunts and cousins) had it, I never really had a reason to learn about it.

However, a little over 11 years ago, I met my wife for the first time and later learned she had the disease. Even then, this wasn't a big deal because she only had a mild form of it. But, after our oldest daughter was born, it became worse and, as a result, became a big part of her life and, as an extension, my life too.

At first, I wasn't really sure what to do about this or if there was really anything I could do for her. But, over time, I learned I had a valuable support role to play. From that, I picked up some bits of advice I would pass on to anyone who finds themselves in the same situation I'm in.

First, do your research. As I mentioned before, I really didn't know what psoriasis was until I met my wife. Once I learned she had it, I used the internet and any other resource I could find to educate myself on the disease (which, it turns out, is more than just a skin condition). Once I did this and weeded out the misinformation that is out there, it put me in a much better position when it came to supporting her.

Second, don't be afraid of it. The disease isn't contagious (as you'll learn from doing research) and you shouldn't treat it that way. One thing I do with my wife is kiss the spots that have it, to show her it doesn't bother me. That, along with not being afraid to touch it, does go a long way to helping her self confidence.

Third, like many other diseases, know this can cause depression and be prepared. This is especially true when it comes to my wife both because her looks are important to her and because the disease has progressed to the point it is affecting her joints and causing her discomfort. I've found it's best to just take my wife's mind off of things by taking her out to dinner or shopping. But, each person is different and you'll have to adjust accordingly.

Fourth, if you have kids, discuss the disease with them. I learned this the hard way when my oldest daughter started asking my wife uncomfortable questions about the dry, flaky skin on her elbows. As a result, I now sit down to talk to her and her younger sister about it on a regular basis. This helps them understand it better so they aren't drawing attention to it by asking my wife about it.

Fifth, if you're able, do your part when it comes to medication. As I mentioned before, this isn't curable. But, as my wife and I learned, there are a number of medications out there that do help keep it under control. Many of these, like the one my wife takes, require a regular and sometimes painful injection. If your loved one is taking one of these, be there for them when they do. I know my wife has a much easier time when she can grip my hand while injecting herself.

Psoriasis can be a life-changing disease for some people. If this is the case when it comes to your spouse or another loved one, taking the time to be there for them makes a huge difference.