Holiday Eggnog Recipies

With cool fall weather already here in much of the U.S. winter holidays can't be far behind! And nothing says 'warm up' better than that favorite centerpiece--the holiday punchbowl--filled to the brim with yummy eggnog. Plan to start using it immediately once the first snowflake hits the ground and share, if you dare, a few of my favorite recipes with your closest friends and family this holiday season. Cheers!

Traditional Eggnog: Mix one quart bourbon with four quarts eggnog. Serve in individual punch cups with a dash of nutmeg atop. Enjoy.

Non-Alcoholic Eggnog: Why bother, but if you must: Pour four quarts eggnog into a large punchbowl. Refrigerate for 45 minutes then garnish with sprinkles of nutmeg and cinnamon stick in each cup. [While waiting for mixture to cool consider passing around a few 'joints' or hash pipe for guests to enjoy due to the bland nature of this 'hoochless' concoction.] Target audience: Human Resource Managers or Accounting professionals who lack a sense of humor.

'Fastrack' Eggnog: If time is at a premium then don't waste any "getting there" during your next alcoholic interlude. Simply accelerate the party by combining one quart "Wild Turkey" [101 proof] with just two quarts eggnog. Then, sit back and watch your guests 'light up the night' with this time-saving recipe. [Remember to keep mixture and guests away from open flame and provide plenty of warm blankets and emesis bowls to stay-overs.] Smart hostesses also know to remove furniture and glass from party area prior to serving.

'Breathless' Nog: A favorite among alcoholics--also great to serve at midday office parties--and to officials 'on duty.' Mix one quart grain alcohol with three quarts eggnog. Ladle generously into punch cups. Serve with airline sickness bags and prepaid cab cards.

'Irish' Eggnog: Combine two quarts Irish whiskey, one quart grain alcohol, one quart Southern Comfort, one quart bourbon, one quart Absynthe, one-half quart Pernod, two ounces regular eggnog, and a dash of turpentine into a large punch bowl. Stir Well, serves 4-6. Ideal to serve during pub-crawls, family punch-outs on the lawn, etc.

'Eggless' Eggnog: Worried about cholesterol? Try this: Pour two quarts bourbon into a large bowl. Garnish with apples and allow partygoers to 'bob.' [Remember to remain seated while room is in motion.]

'Dentists' Eggnog: Make traditional eggnog the favorite among medical plaza hygenists in 2008!

'Homeless' 'Nog: Start with 'traditional eggnog' above only substitute one can "Sterno" for bourbon. Mix well in trashcan. Serve in readily-available, discarded tin cans. A cinch to warm up any alleyway or shelter during those long, chilly winter nights!

Whatever the occasion make it fun and festive. Try experimenting with eggnog to make your own traditions come to life. Drink responsibly and have a happy holiday season!