Hospice Care: A Stranger Helps Heal Sorrow

Dame Cicely Saunders, the founder of the modern hospice movement, believes that there's a value to living life to the fullest even when time is running short. "You matter because of who you are," Saunders said. "You matter to the last moment of your life, and we will do all we can not only to
help you die peacefully, but also to live until you die."

Most of us don't fear dying. We fear the process of death, the loneliness, the anguish, the pain. When a loved one is dying, hospice is there to help. The philosophy of hospice is, "When pain is controlled, and physical, psychological and spiritual support are available, patients have a better
quality of life."

Hospice services are available to those who have a terminal illness and life expectation of six months or less. Referral can be made by a physician, patient, family member, friend or community agency. There is no charge to the patient; services are paid for by donations, fundraising, hospice
thrift stores, Medicare, Medi-Cal and private insurance.

Hospice services include:

Nurses who provide expert care and symptom management, home visits, 24-hour on-call and family assistance.

Home health aides for personal care and household chores.

Trained volunteers to lend support and provide companionship for family members.

Counselors and social workers to offer emotional support, counseling and information about community resources.

Spiritual support offers by hospice chaplains.

Grief counseling, support and education.

A lending library of books and tapes.

Hospice nurse Cathy Hudson feels her most important job is in making patients comfortable during their final days. "Approximately half our patients have cancer. They are referred to us after treatment has stopped, there are no more options, and death will come soon. The most important
thing we can do for them is make sure they live their final days in peace, with as much quality of life as we can make possible."

But hospice nurses do far more than just make people comfortable. Much of their job has to do with instruction in caring for the elderly; Cathy believes a lot of elder abuse arises from neglect, which is then compounded when people are fearful they will be found out and castigated. The
situation escalates, until the poor patient is left to suffer, not out of malice but negligence and fear.

When the patient dies, the hospice nurses will help prepare the body for funeral home pickup. "Many times, people don't want to even touch a dead body. We're there to help with bathing the body, clothing and arranging it for the funeral pickup. We'll deal with the coroner's office, if need
be, and the police. Those can be scary to people -- many times they need reassurance that what they're doing is right.

"The truth is, there is no right or wrong way to care for the terminally ill. The most important thing is that they be happy until they leave us...and everyone has a different way of accomplishing that. We're here to help with every step of the process."

Hospice care is more than nursing -- the options extend into many avenues, like the branches of a flowering tree. Preparation of meals, housekeeping, bathing and daily hygiene and help with funeral arrangements are the basics. Beyond that there are spiritual counseling and social work
counseling. Social worker Michelle Boylan loves her job, though it can be exhausting, and sees herself as being part of a team that supports people through the most difficult time of their lives. "Every case is different, which is why hospice services are so varied. I can offer one-on-one
counseling in grief anticipation and management, changing family roles and day-to-day anxiety. The most important thing about hospice care is that patients can die at home, surrounded by friends and loved ones," said Boylan.

Having to die in a hospital, antiseptic and uncomfortable, kept alive with no privacy, no dignity and no quality of life, would be a nightmare to us all. With hospice, the hospital experience can be avoided in many cases.