How to Catch an Aussie Stud

Where else is there an over abundance of attractive men? Australia. There are more Aussie studs than the Australian women need or have a use for. If your budget doesn't allow travel to Australia, don't fear! You are in luck. Many Australian men tend to migrate to Western Canada or to the United States on visitor visas. In Canada, you may find many working on the ski slopes at popular resorts. Typically, you have between six months and two years to nail one before his temporary work visa expires. Or, you may find yourself a gem working on an H1B visa (longer-term) in various Hi-tech hot spots around the United States.

A couple great places to start are California's Silicon Valley or the Redmond area of Washington State. Then, you must track down the place in which they gather. I'll save you time: That would be a pub. Prick up your ears and listen for the accent. Once you locate your man, swoon him with your independent American womanly ways. They like it when you say "really?" a lot. A very effective way to get your stud's attention is to bring up the subject of Australian Rules football or simply "Footy". Educate yourself on the sport a bit, so you don't sound like a complete idiot. An added bonus with this sport is that Australian men are without the American football gear. Bulky helmets and pads get in the way of appreciating the American player's physique. However, Australian men play scantily clad in snug "daisy duke" type shorts. Excuse me, I digressed. Continue to converse enthusiastically with your stud for the first time. It's okay if you don't understand most of what he says. That's normal. Just smile and say "yeah". If you haven't got him hooked before his visa expires he may have to go back to Australia (as in my case). Don't worry. You haven't lost your stud yet. He may not have a choice. You'll simply have to casually invite yourself to visit him downunder.

After you charge (invest) the $2000.00 flight to your virgin Visa Platinum card, you'll have approximately ten days to win him over and drag him back to the states with you. Ten days because that is long enough to get him hooked, and short enough to keep him guessing. In addition to that, a stay like that will cost you, so let's be as brief as possible. Once you arrive, focus on being very cool. Don't whine and moan about having to go soon or that you'll miss him. When it's time to leave, be strong, tell him it's unfortunate that you won't be able to be together anymore. Make a comment about dreading the old dating scene with American men. If they like you at all, their competitive, territorial rights with an American man will perk up. Don't let him see you cry, that'll make him think you are hooked. Keep him guessing and stay confident. When you get home, in addition to email, make sure you sign up with a good telephone long distance company, otherwise you'll have paid what amounts to the cost of a large house in a matter of months.

If you have successfully hooked him, it shouldn't take too long before he quits his job, sells all of his personal belongings, and comes back to visit you. Once he arrives, you are in the home stretch. It's just a matter of days before the proposal comes and you reel him in. Once engaged, reserve a church and reception hall ASAP. Then, get your immigration paperwork filled out and ready to go. You're on your way.

Next, I feel obligated to give you some tips on housing your new Aussie stud husband. They are not like American men. They are actually much less complex and if you know how to work them, you'll be quite happy. They are also much more reliable considering you are holding their green card for the first few years. The government will want to interview you a few times to make sure the union is legit (Note: see Green Card) First and foremost, they need plenty of beer. This is a safety precaution. Just keep the bottom level of your fridge stocked with beer and don't ask questions. It won't work to use cheap beer either, that will aggravate him. Put the cheap beer aside for you're your friends visiting from the South, and get a good lager for your Aussie stud. Also, make sure you explain the difference between the doorbell, microwave ding, and dryer buzzer. My Aussie once answered the door when the dryer buzzer went off. Full explanation of appliances will avoid future confusion and embarrassment for your stud. Now that the Aussie stud is yours, you will have to make an effort to not only understand what he's saying, but translate it to your friends and family. In the beginning, you may want to minimize frustrations for your stud by ordering the pizza, calling the cab, and doing other things over the telephone that require clear speech. It will be helpful for you to pick up an "Aussie Speak and Slang" book. You may want to keep large knives, any sort of meat product, and fire away from your Aussie stud when he has his friends over. The compulsion to BBQ is inherit in their psyche, and you may lose some kitchen furniture as well. Good luck.