How to Get a Cool Cat to Warm Up to You

Does your cat greet you with hisses instead of kisses? Do they try to escape whenever you come near? If so, you might be using the wrong strategy. Here are some helpful tips for getting a cat to warm up to your presence.

Fear and territorial aggression are the roots of most feline hostility. Cats are designed by nature to flee or fight when they feel threatened, and unaccustomed scents can make them downright mean. Unfortunately, if you don't give them time to get used to your scent and appearance, or if you use the wrong body language, any cat can view you as a threat to their safety.

The rules of cat communication are: Try to look as small and non-threatening as possible; watch the cat's body language closely; and learn to communicate with them in their own language, which involves sound, scent, and sight.

Get Down on Their Level

When you first walk up to greet a cat, put yourself in the cat's place. Would you want a large person looming over you and putting their hands near your face? Of course not.

Start your welcoming by getting down nearer to the cat's level. Don't get in their face, or even within claw range, but do lower your body and try to appear smaller and less intimidating. Avoid making abrupt movements or speaking in a loud voice.

Let Them Smell You

A cat needs to be able to smell you. Your scent carries all kinds of information about you, and felines use this information to decide if you're trustworthy. If you're not sure whether it's safe to touch the cat, leave something with your scent (such as clothing or glasses) near the cat. If they're interested, they will sniff the object and form an opinion of you.

Close Your Eyes

For cats, closed eyes are a sign of trust. If you're not comfortable closing your eyes all the way, lower your lids so that your eyes appear smaller and more relaxed. Blink slowly. When the cat returns this slow blink, you will know you're making progress.

Observe Their Body Language

Comfortable cats appear unconcerned. A very alert cat with ears forward and eyes wide open is displaying signs of intense interest. This is fine in a playful setting, but in a welcome scenario, it can indicate distrust and fear. Never reach for a cat who is staring into your eyes, tensing their body, and swishing their tail.

Use Touch and Scent

When the cat finally warms up to you, it's important to allow it to mark you with its scent. Cats do this by rubbing their head and cheek against you. Once the cat has marked you and can recognize its own scent on your hands, it will be much safer to reach out and pet it. As you touch the cat, speak to it in a high, soft voice.

Cats can seem like cool customers at first, but most of them will warm up if you communicate the right way. Use these tips to convince your cat that you're someone worth getting to know. (If all else fails, try bribery; treats are always welcome!)