How to Create Balance as a Working,Single Parent

My experience as a leader has shown me that being a single parent is challenging when you work full-time. I have friends, colleagues, and clients who are single parents and they all share similar stories. One of my male friends is serving in the military and raising a teenager. I think about how challenging this must be for him as I listen to my married girlfriend talk about how drained she is balancing children and work, even though she has help. Most of us work because we have to, not because we want to in order to maintain a modest lifestyle. In the case of my male friend, he shares with me that he wants to be the best father he can be and give his son a sense of security. This isn't uncommon or surprising, but the question is how does one balance parenting and working when having a job is mandatory? Certainly I am not a parenting expert , but I do have a few suggestions that might help balance your load and may not cost you any additional money.

Single parents may not have the job of their choice which can present long hours and minimal wages. My first suggestion is to have trusted people around you who are willing to help you succeed. My friend is deployed from time to time based on the nature of his role in the military. He doesn't want to take his son out of school every time he leaves, so he has a close network friends and relatives who care for his son in his absence. His story is similar to my mother's, who went through a divorce with my father when I was in elementary school. She wasn't in the military, but she did have to work to take care of me, which meant she needed assistance once I was released from school for the day. Perhaps you need someone to help your child with homework. You might be able to find free local tutors who can assist with homework, which might save you time during the work week. Ideally, no man or woman is an island and we all need assistance in one way or another.

My second suggestion would be career counseling if you are interested in making more money. The reason I say this is because I've taken jobs throughout the course of my career in an effort to make more money. As a manager, it seemed natural to go from one company to another securing various management positions along the way. I didn't realize at the time that I could have been doing something else, making more money, and learning additional skills along the way. I had no real career goals; I simply wanted to make money, which was counterproductive in some aspects. Not being able to answer the question, "what is it that I really want to do for a living" left me gainfully employed and spinning my wheels for years. You might find that there is another opportunity that will help you balance your load while making more money.

Lastly, I would suggest finding time for you. My friends sometimes tell me that they need a break, which everyone deserves from time to time. They don't want anything extravagant; they simply want to relax and have a good time. I think about how hectic my life can be sometimes and I look forward to going to the beach. I never get in the water because I can't swim, but being around the water is relaxing. I enjoy quiet moments, reading a book, and spending time with family as well as friends. My point is, take a break and do some things that you really enjoy. The time that you set aside to rejuvenate and replenish can not only enhance your performance at work, but can also allow you to effectively handle the challenges of being a single parent. Finding balance between work and parenting as a single parent isn't impossible; it just takes time and help from others.

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