How to Deal with a Child's Fear of Santa

For many families a cherished holiday tradition is taking the kids to the mall to visit Santa Claus. While most children look forward to the opportunity to inform Santa what they expect to find under the tree Christmas morning and to have their picture taken with jolly old St. Nick, others, especially younger children, may be fearful of Santa.

If you are taking your toddler to visit Santa for the first time or are giving this holiday tradition another try after a disappointing experience last year, there are a number of steps you can take to prepare your child for the visit and improve the odds that it will be enjoyable for both of you.

Talk to your child about Santa Claus. Use books (your local library probably has plenty) and/or movies to acquaint your child with Santa's appearance, including his long beard and red suit, since these will be out of the ordinary for her. Especially focus on images of Santa interacting with happy children.

Discuss the planned visit with Santa with your child ahead of time. Tell her what to expect, what she will be doing and where you will be.

Visit Santa at an off time. Plan to go early in the holiday season, before the mall is jammed with holiday shoppers and the lines to meet with Santa are long. Malls tend to be less crowded on weekdays, with late morning being an especially good time for a visit. Check with your local mall to find out the hours when Santa will be available.

See Santa soon after you arrive at the mall. When you and your child are fresh and relaxed, rather than after hours of shopping, when you both are likely to be cranky and impatient.

Let your child set the pace. Don't rush her and, if need be, let her get used to the sight of Santa from afar before you approach him. Also, she may be less fearful if she sees other kids enjoying a visit with Santa, so, before getting in line, let her spend some time watching other children talk to Santa and have their pictures taken with him. Children often want to join in the fun when they see other children having a good time.

Don't insist that your child sit on Santa's lap or even get too close to Santa. If she doesn't want to. It is perfectly acceptable for her to stand or sit next to or near Santa. Also, stay near your child so that you can react quickly if she becomes afraid.

Let your child keep a favorite blanket or toy with her if she insists. While you may prefer a photo without the ratty bear she's adored since before she started walking, letting her have a security item could make the difference between getting a picture or going home empty handed.

If your child is too fearful, don't force the issue. Skip this year's visit with Santa and plan to try again next year.

Don't laugh at a child that is afraid. Don't let others make fun of her fears and don't lecture her about why there is no reason to be scared. Respect her feelings.

Finally, make the visit with Santa about your child not about you. Focus on making happy memories for her not for yourself and, if visiting Santa is simply not going to be a happy experience for her this year, let it go and plan to give it another try next year.