How Do You Deal When Your Ex-Husband Gets a New Girlfriend?

I drove up the road to my ex's house to pick up my daughter yesterday. I drove up right behind a small gold colored car. The car suddenly stopped, right in front of the house and she got out with a bag of groceries in her hand and walked up toward the front door. She had no clue I had driven up behind her. With my hands on the wheel I kind of squinted and leaned forward to get a good look at her, though I could only see her from behind. As I looked her over, I had the overwhelming urge to start singing really loud, that song, "I love big butts and I can not lie". She had on fitted, high wasted jeans, probably from the 70's. It's the look that, if you have a big butt, makes it appear magnified. She had the big hair too. I felt good about that. I don't have a big butt and have long since donated all of my old 70's clothing. I backed up my car. I was slightly panicked, not sure what I was supposed to do in this situation but I knew I didn't want to be parked behind her or in front of the house. My daughter would have to walk down the street a bit to meet me.

I saw my daughter come out of the house and pass her by with no acknowledgment. The ex was just looking out the front door. He had seen the whole thing and was probably cursing out loud. I wouldn't think the situation was planned, more just destined to happen. I had known about her for a long time. Families don't have secrets, that's just a myth. Families don't always talk about things, but everyone knows the deal. Cheating, drugs, alcohol, finances, bad habits, whatever the problem; everyone knows. The job for all of the mental health professionals is really just to make you talk about things you already know.

Everything I reads says that half of all marriages end up in divorce, so this stuff is going on everyday, all over the country. It has to be hard in every single situation. What a kick in the self esteem to have your spouse get sick of you, or give up on you. I don't really believe any of those stories about ex's that have a perfect relationship, now best of friends. In those articles you read in the magazines about how to get along with your ex, the scenarios are definitely made up. The people in the pictures have to be models posing, for a paycheck. No way two people can cause each other such trauma and then go on to be best buddies. That only happens for fifth graders. Civility might be possible. A sense of humor helps the situation. Before I leave the house to pick up my daughter today, I check myself out in the full length mirror and note that my butt and my hair are both small and my clothes are of this decade. Today, I might drive all the way up the street.