How to Deal with the Horrors of a Painful Joke

Loved ones are the closest people in our life that can joke around as much as they want and still end up being profusely cared and understood. What if they sport an attitude of "I don't care?"

You may have experienced this situation before and ended up being taken lightly. You may have just allowed your tears to flow hoping that it will end in time before someone notices then you will be obliged to explain.

What if that joke is the kind of topic that can cause your relationship to end? Thus, the unintended prank keeps you from loving that person anymore? Would that be fair to both of you?

Now, this is the scenario, your loved one throws a joke; you are too uptight and reacted by crying. Your loved one thought you are just over reacting and left you alone hoping that you can just recover on your own.

You, on the other hand, expected to be cuddled and to be hushed with sweet whispers of "I did not say it to hurt you, it is just a joke." You need that dependable shoulder that everyone is talking about when you are in a relationship.

A little bit of explanation goes a long way in an important relationship. After all, we are rationale beings and there are reasons why we talk and we act the way we do. In an attempt, to save this relationship, one may simply ask for an explanation, to start with.

So how do we deal with situations like this? I can give you three ways.

v Be open-minded and remain objective. Ask yourself, is the topic worth pursuing as far as to end a great relationship that is in full bloom? If so, then you can end it right there. If not, then you can answer with a counter-joke or simply ignore it.

v Appeal to your understanding nature. We have this enormous well of understanding within us that is difficult to run out when we are dealing with the person we love the most. Keep it that way, if you have resolved deep inside you that the joke is not worth the discussion enough to cause a full-blown conflict. Always control the child in you and understand that there are so many types of personality, and you need to be flexible.

v Keep eye contact. The eyes never lie except for an experienced con artist and unless your loved one belongs to that category; you might want to give the benefit of a doubt. Your survival instinct will serve as your lie detector; so do not suppress it. Remember that love is still the strongest emotion and it conquers all, including immaturity, no matter what stage of the relationship you are currently in.