How to Deal with Obnoxious Bluetooth Users

Everytime the bluetooth user says something into the air... repeat it. They'll catch on and when they finally get off the phone you'll be a hero. You can even spice it up with the classic stupid voice you used as a kid when you couldn't deliver a decent comeback. Not only is it effective, it's funny. If they have anything say to you afterward just keep copying them. Vintage Immature Smart-Ass. "Stop copying me!" - "Stop copying me!"

2. Inquire about the conversation.

When they finally get off the phone ask them what they were talking about. With any luck they'll tell you it's none of your business. Then you can retort with: "No shit! Next time wait till after you get your frappachino and take the convo outside dick-head!"

3. Grab the bluetooth off their ear and run away.

The bastard will never see it coming. Just swipe it off and make a run for it. If they're gaining on you just throw it in the street. Or better yet, turn around and throw it right at their face. Then kick 'em in the shin and bolt. That'll teach 'em.

4. Stare

Sometimes just staring at someone will get your point across. If they keep talking or try to ignore you just get closer and closer. Get as close as you can and breath really hard and slow. Try not to speak or laugh if they finally confront you. Just keep staring.

5. Throw piping hot coffee in their face.

This is a little drastic and may be another situation where you may have to run away. Actually, you should runaway. Nonetheless, you're having the worst day in your life and all you want to do is get a scone and an espresso to get you through the rest of it. But the guy four people behind you is yapping away like he's talking to everyone in the store and you've finally had it. Quickly change your order to a regular coffee and throw it right into his face. Keep in mind though, if you're caught you'll probably be facing legal charges. But, if you get away clean you'll be satisfied for life. Next time you have a bad day you can think about the time you threw hot liquid in that yuppies face.

6. Push them over you're friend who is quietly kneeling behind them.

This obviously requires another person who is willing to take a risk for the good of mankind. It doesn't even have to be a friend. More than likely, the person next to you will be as frustrated and annoyed as you. Just check their other ear for a bluetooth device before you ask them to conspire with you. They could be on the dark side.

7. Politely ask them to get off the phone.

"Excuse me, can you please stop talking on your stupid bluetooth. I don't know if you're talking to me or someone else because I can't see the little black piece of crap in your ear. You're voice is being projected at a very weird level that makes everyone around you feel awkward. If your conversation is so important go home or to your office. Right now I really don't see the difference between you and a crazy homeless person talking to themselves on the street. You're impeding on my personal hearing space. It's the audio equivalent of farting. If you don't get off, I swear to christ, I'll throw piping hot coffee in your face. Thank you."