How to Deal with Separation Anxiety from Your Newborn

Lisa Riggs
After experiencing nine months of pregnancy and then bringing a brand new little baby into the world, it can be very traumatic having to leave that little angel in the care of someone else. The anxiety that comes from this separation, no matter how brief, can be very painful and worrisome to new parents. This article will offer some gentle advice on how to deal with these myriad of emotions and make a short time away from your newborn a relaxing and beneficial experience instead.

Realize that Separation Anxiety is Perfectly Normal. While the child may not experience this phenomenon until he or she is between twelve and eighteen months, parents deal with these painful emotions almost from the moment of birth. A parent's protective nature is so intense and the love so great, that being away from their infant feels like a part of them is missing. For a mother whose body is still adjusting to a post pregnancy status, this is even more true. Even a ten minute trip to the corner store can produce feelings of loss, sadness and anxiety. Accept the fact that these feelings are par for the course and will lessen over time.

Take Baby Steps. Pardon the pun, but the best way to process these feelings of separation anxiety is to start with small ventures away from home that last an hour or less. If you are going to be returning to work and will suddenly be separated from your baby for eight hours a day, don't wait until that that morning to take your first time away from baby. Slowly work up to this quantity of time with quick jaunts to the library, the grocery store and a lunch date with friends. You may feel that you need to spend every second of your life with your newborn baby, but a little time away is essential to your physical and emotional health.

Leave Your Baby with Someone You Trust Implicitly. Besides your partner, there should be someone in your life that you feel very comfortable leaving your baby with while you run errands, go to the gym and eventually resume your career outside the home. Separation anxiety can be quite difficult to work through if you don't have the security that your baby is in excellent hands while you are away. If your baby will be cared for by a babysitter or child care center when you go back to work, be sure they have impeccable references and were recommended by someone you trust. Ideally, you should be able to visit the site several times before dropping off your baby for the day and also be allowed to watch the interaction between the caregiver and your child in a trial run.

Seek Advice from a More Experienced Parent. If you are really struggling with being separated from your baby for any length of time, seek the support and advice from your mother, mother in law, sister or best friend. Being able to freely express your emotions as well as hear other parent's experiences with this situation will surely bring you comfort as well as offer helpful suggestions.

Seek the Advice of Your Obstetrician. If your baby is more than a month old and you are still experiencing severe separation anxiety, making it difficult to go back to work, have a date night with your spouse or even take a trip to the grocery store, it may be time to share this with your obstetrician. You may be suffering from post pregnancy depression. While feelings of concern and a desire to be reunited with your baby is perfect normal while separated, becoming severely depressed, crying over a short trip away from home or refusing to leave the house without the baby is not. Your doctor will be able to put a plan in place to treat your depression and get you on the road to a more emotionally healthy state of mind.

Published by Lisa Riggs

Happily married mom of two wonderful girls.  View profile

1 Comments

Post a Comment
  • Charlotte Kuchinsky12/6/2010

    Great topic.

To comment, please sign in to your Yahoo! account, or sign up for a new account.