How I Dealt with a Rotten Teenage Attitude

Cheryl Williams
Having successfully raised 3 children, I must say that the teenage years were the most trying. I don't know what it is that makes teenagers turn into middle sized monsters, but they do. It's a fact. A lot of it probably has to do with changing hormones. A lot of it also probably has to do with being stuck in between childhood and adulthood. Most teenagers want the privileges that come with being an adult, but they continue to act like children.

My daughter was the one that had the most attitude. When she hit age 12, there was nothing I could tell her. She knew it all. She decided that it was okay to skip school and hang out with her friends. She decided it was okay to leave and not tell me where she was going. One time she thought it was okay to take my car without asking. As it turns out she was gone for an entire day and night.

At first I was worried about her. We called missing persons to see if they could locate our car anywhere. The police came to our home to ask questions and talk to us. One of the policemen, on finding out the problems she had been giving us, gave us the best advice we could receive.

"Take a warrant out on her for stealing your car," he said. "I can almost guarantee this will put her on the right path very quickly."

At first we were mortified at the idea of having our own child arrested, but the more we thought about it, the more sense it made. We had tried everything. She was on a downhill path and moving fast. What she needed was a wake up call. So we did it. We had a warrant taken out on her.

When she returned home the next day, we told her what we had done. She was upset, crying and promising to behave from now on. We told her that once it was taken out, they had to go through with it...and would be there to pick her up sometime soon.

She took off out the front door. When the police came, she was gone. They drove around the neighborhood with searchlights looking for her. I was inside crying my eyes out, for I really did not want to have her arrested. It was breaking my heart. The police finally shone a flashlight into our car, and found her crouched down on the floorboard.

They arrested her and took her to jail, where she stayed for 3 days. At that time she had a hearing and was released in our custody...and the charges were dropped as long as she did what she was supposed to. We had the option of taking her back at any time.

This event turned her life around. She got back on track in school and returned to the straight A student she had always been. She started being more respectful to us. Today she is a beautiful, intelligent 24 year old with a successful life ahead of her. Tough love isn't always easy, but in this case it was definitely for the best.

Published by Cheryl Williams

Cheryl resides in Charlotte, NC, where she is the Charlotte Love & Marriage Examiner and the Charlotte Conflict Resolution Examiner for Examiner.com. She is a writer with many publishing credits, including...  View profile

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  • Megan Duncan1/29/2009

    Good for you!! My mom often considered tough love on me, I often wonder what would have happened. Would I have turned out any better?

  • Lenora Murdock1/29/2009

    I've heard of parents having to do this. The ones who followed through didn't usually have worse problems down the road. Those who let things go find their adult kids in jail (Not all the time - but I've seen it enough to know you did the right thing, as difficult as it must have been.)

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