How My Doctor Created and Supported My Addiction to Pain Killer Medication

A few years ago, like most people, I found myself feeling a little run down. I went to my primary care physician and read her my list of complaints, which ranged from neck pain, lower back spasms, neck cramps and numbness in my hands. She followed all the proper steps, sending me to specialists as well as for diagnostic procedures such as MRI's and blood work.

When my test results came back they showed minimal issues, which are probably common to most people whether they feel symptoms or not. I had iron deficiency anemia and a slight case of disc herniation in my back. After going to specialists for both problems, they treated me and assured me I had nothing to worry about.

At the time my line of work was extremely physically demanding and the pain grew more and more unbearable. The constant aches and pains led to a depressed mood and overall sense of apathy. I was constantly awake at night because I was uncomfortable in my bed, and rarely got a full night of sleep. I felt as though my body was beginning to fall apart and my mind was going to be next. I went back to the doctor.

She strongly believed I had Fibromyalgia (which is another article/debate in itself) and was also suffering from the fact that I was 20 pounds over the normal weight range for my height. She took out her pad and wrote me a slew of prescriptions, claiming they would all help ease my problems that were doomed to coexist with me my whole life. I was 26 at the time.

The first prescription she gave me was for some diet pill I had never even heard of, Tenuate. She explained that it's been around since the 1960"s and would help me take some weight off and therefore relieve some of my pain issues. Trusting my doctor, I took it.

After a few weeks of speeding my way through life, I started wanting the pill just to keep me going. It was starting to help me take some weight off since I wasn't eating anything do its ability to cause me to feel sickened at the thought of food consumption. I decided to stop taking the pill after realizing it was too habit-forming and a cause for worry. By now the pains in my knees and back were causing me to lose much needed sleep at night. I went back to the doctor.

This time she prescribed me Wellbutrin to lose the weight and Vicodin to ease the pain. She gave me a script for 120 5-milligram pills of Vicodin with 3 refills. Without me realizing it yet, my doctor had just turned into my drug dealer.

The Vicodin did more than just ease my pain. It turned me into a "super" version of myself. I had energy all day long, and as long as I was on the pills I remained happy and agreeable. I started taking twice the dose prescribed then three times the amount. Before I knew it I was taking an entire bottle of 120 pills within 2 weeks. I took the Wellbutrin as directed without abusing it and found myself dropping weight like crazy. In just a few months time I had lost 30 pounds, but found the effects of the Vicodin weren't the same on such a low dosage. I needed more.

I went back to the doctor and told her that the effects of the pill didn't work as well, and that I was taking more than the prescribed amount. I also expressed to her that although I felt great I feared addiction. She solved the problem by increasing the Vicodin to 7.5 milligrams and convinced me that I could take up to 10 a day without any worries of becoming addicted.

I began driving down to New York from Pennsylvania every few months just to get more prescriptions, which she gave me without any question. I also got pills from friends, neighbors, coworkers, anyone I knew. I even went as far as having dental work done so I could get more pills.

I continued to take the pills, increasing the amount I would consume at one time every few days. At my worst I was taking 12 pills at once, up to twice a day. Once again I found myself running out of pills before the refill was ready. I became frantic and physically ill. I awoke during the night with cold sweats and agitation. I was mean and nasty to my loved ones and did whatever I could to get more pills.

I went to the emergency room, but they gave me a small amount in a lower dose. I went to another doctor who prescribed me ninety 10 milligram Vicodin with 2 refills. I filled them in a different pharmacy and hoped my insurance company wouldn't reject the request. They didn't.

This cycle went on for a few months more until it was time to get new scripts. At this point my primary doctor increased my dosage to 10 milligrams but the second doctor wouldn't give me any more pills. I knew that I would be finished with the pills before it was time for a refill and decided to buy some on the internet.

After finding a website where people in forums shared the best places to buy, I ordered them. They came via UPS and cost me over $100.00. Every time I ordered I feared the police would show up instead of the UPS driver. At this point my husband found out what I was doing and finally decided it was time for me to end this obsession which had taken over my life.

Over the next few months I suffered tremendously. I had withdrawal as expected and suffered from depression. My body seemed to hurt more than ever. I stopped seeing the doctor in New York and found a physician close to home who I was completely honest with. She was disgusted by the solution the doctor in New York had come up with for my problems. I was far too young and did not suffer from severe enough issues to be so reliant on these types of drugs.

Although there will also be some sort of issue for me with these pills, it is debatable as to who is to blame for my addiction. I was the one who gained her trust and sought out to abuse the pills once she started me on them. Then again, when I mentioned my concerns to her she was quick to give me more pills without any concern on her behalf.

It is easier than you think to legally become a drug addict and find suppliers for this addiction. With a rise on prescription drug addiction, especially Vicodin, one should carefully consider their own personality before using prescription painkillers. This holds true especially if you are going to be using them on a daily basis and for an extended amount of time.

Before starting any drug prescribed to you, be sure to investigate its potential for abuse on the internet. Even if you would think that you'd never be the type of person to become addicted to painkillers, it is much easier than you think and can happen to anyone. After all, it happened to me without any intent to solicit them in the first place.