How to Effectively Tell Lies

Why Lie?

JZ Murdock
Why lie? How does one effectively lie?

I've never quite known the answer to that. I detest being lied to. Then again I've been in situations where it would be oh so nice to lie about something and move on. But, don't I lose by doing that?

People tend to tell "little white social lies" (sounds poetic, doesn't it), in order to avoid offending or hurting others. People tell lies to avoid uncomfortable social situations, too.

Here is a way to think about getting out of these situations and what it means about you, in whether or not you do tell a lie. I never tell lies. OK, sometimes. I have been known to. However they are few and far between. Really, I greatly dislike it. In fact, I feel that if I have to tell someone a lie, they have governed the situation to where I've done everything I can to tell the truth.

Do I tell them what it is that I don't really want to tell them? No, of course not. But that doesn't mean I have to Lie to them, either. I believe that telling a lie is a very immediate way to "dumb yourself down". In order to always tell the truth and not be brutal about it, one has to be somewhat intelligent. You have to "Think" your way around situations. You might ask, what about "sins of omission"? Isn't leaving something out, lying? To that I would argue a resounding, No!

If you don't want to tell someone something, avoid directly dealing with it. The second stage is to talk around it and the third stage obviously is to Lie. But if you handle it correctly, if you do lie, it will be only because someone wants to be lied to. That's how it should be. Its their choice, not yours. And that's what lets you off easy!

When I have a situation where I want to avoid something, I talk around it. If someone is smart enough, they will see this; then I have to shift into saying exactly what I want to say, without saying it. This typically leaves people in a position to think the best and you are off the hook. But, if they are intelligent enough that they see the options and possibilities you are leaving open, and typically these types are a little paranoid if they push things this far, then you simply have to lie. Or simply tell the Truth.

For myself, I always opt for telling the Truth if possible and with few exceptions. If someone is pushing you, its obvious they DO NOT WANT THE TRUTH. That means they actually know the Truth but do not want to be confronted with it. As an ethical person, you need to make a decision as to what is best for them (not you), because honestly, they just put that ball in your court.

In the end, be intelligent. Always try hard to tell the truth.

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  • GF Hayes8/29/2010

    If someone is robbing or assaulting me, I have no obligation to be honest with them, as they have broken a social contract to be civil. I need not be honest or passive with them. Then, once you breach the point of violence, as in protecting oneself, lies are the least of your worries. Still, I try to be as honest as the situation allows or warrents. As I indicate in the article, I said, I always try NOT to lie, but as you say, everyone tells a lie at some point. The idea was, try not to, don't be lazy, work at telling the truth whenever possible.

  • stain8/26/2010

    i want to be the best lie

  • Worried11/22/2009

    Menacing person: have You got fifty bucks? Give it to me! You: No, sorry I just spent my last dollar on....

    Should You have told the truth, that You had fifty dollars? I think not.

    But how do You work this situation in with YOUR philosophy? It was clearly a lie. And the other person really wanted to know, and did not want to be lied to, (as You suggested is the only situation where it is ok to lie.) I think lying is a natural thing to do. Cat's arch their back to appear bigger when threatened, that's a kind of lying. Some insects look or behave like some similar but dangerous species. Are humans the only species who should not lie? Or is it all due to religion? Or are only lies with the intent to harm the unacceptable type? I think there is more to lying than just philosophy. Should lying be taught in schools. Which lies are acceptable and which are not. After all, EVERYBODY lies sometimes, and having to learn it from scratch / trial and error is not a good way.

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