How to Find a Date (Safely) Online

Cyberspace is the hottest place to be to find all kinds of people to date. It used to be that people only thought those who went the online route were super-shy or physically less than desirable. Many of us have friends who have successfully met normal desirable people online.

To safely meet people online, there are certain steps you must take. You can never be too careful with all the weirdoes lurking out there. The tricky part is not to be so paranoid as to not give anyone a chance for you to get to know better and vice versa.

Steps

Decide what type of people you want to meet. If you are open to a wide variety of people, try a large public site like Match.com or Yahoo! personals. If you are more specific, try a more niche-focused site like AfroConnections.com or AsianFriendFinder.com.

Subscribe. You will want to find a site that meets your budget. There is a broad range of prices. Many sites discount for multiple months purchased at one time. I suggest buying one month the first time to see how well you like the site. If you like the site, you can re-subscribe for more months at a lower rate. Many sites also offer free trials. Take your time and search around.

Take one good recent picture. Having a good picture on file dramatically increases your chances for success. Good pics will receive up to 20 times more responses than ones without. If you are getting more attention than you can handle, you can simply choose to hide your pic for later.

Create your profile. Keep it simple. Each site may ask for slightly different information. Be yourself. Do not disclose anything negative about yourself. There will be plenty of time for that later.

Browse through profiles. This is the fun part. Search through profiles to find people you think you might like to meet. Everyone is fair game.

Check for reviews about them. Before making contact, check to see if other people who have met them have entered reviews regarding the truthfulness of their profile. Visit a site like TrueDater.com and enter the correct dating site and profile ID for the person in question. You can even enter a review on a person you have met online to help future online daters.

Contact them. Send them an email or IM them. Mention a detail in their profile that caught your eye. Say something witty and wait for a response.

Talk by phone. After lots of emails and/or IMs to feel comfortable with your new friend, the next step is to talk by phone. You can usually tell whether you will have chemistry with this person by listening to their voice. By no means feel obligated to meet someone in person just because you have talked with them over the phone. If you feel uncomfortable, listen to your inner voice and tell them you had a change of mind. You do not need an explanation.

Tips

Be honest.

Keep in mind that not everyone is always telling the truth on profiles.

Use your gut feeling in every situation.

Meet your online date during the day and in a public place.

Always tell a friend where you are going and have them call your cell during the date to see how you are doing.