How to Find Good Day Care

Finding good day care-whether it's for your child or for your parent/grandparent-doesn't have to be a daunting task, it just takes some research and some time.

As a former owner of a pre-school and day care, I found many parents didn't really know what they were doing when it came to hiring someone to care for and teach the most precious thing in their lives. As a person whose parents/in-law are getting older and will be needing certain types of care I have begun to think of what I need to do for them.

How do you find proper day care? First, be honest with yourself about what it is you and your child/parent need. Don't think that there's only one type of facility out there and it's just the price that's different!

An example: Both you and your spouse have to work. Since you don't see this as a situation that will be changing and your child is but a mere infant, you want to chose a place that will care for not just an "infant", but the future toddler as well. Most parents do not understand how important it is to a small child that they are not ripped away from a secure loving environment too soon. Ask questions: Do you hold the baby or prop them during feeding time? How do you feel about schedules, diets, teaching? What is your "sick" policy? Do you put on the television during the day, if so what do you allow the children to watch and for how long? How long are the children outside for play time?

These are important. When I ran my business, I had a plan of action. We ate at certain times, did pre-school at the same hour, naptime for the toddlers was done consistently. I believed a baby should be held during bottle time and should have definite times of certain activities. My communication with the parents was paramount to our relationship. Not all people who came through my door felt that way. Make sure the person and place you chose have the same values and priorities that you hold near and dear.

For senior citizens-what programs are you in need of? An elderly person with Alzheimer's disease needs very different care than someone who has lost their physical mobility. Does your parent did constant watching, medications, relaxation or stimulation?

Really look over the facility. Is it clean, organized? Ask about staff turnover. Whether it's for child or adult, it's important to address the bonding issue. After all, this person/persons will be caring for someone who, in most cases, are there because they cannot care for themselves. Do you want to be re-explaining every few weeks what your loved one's needs and foibles are?

One parent I had was so bent on her child going to "big" kid school by the time she was 2 1/2, failed to recognize that her child couldn't handle the change. I knew that our views on child-rearing were different and should have listened to my gut-but this mother was a co-worker of a client I had enjoyed for over 5 years. This co-worker turned out to be a rather negligent parent who constantly dropped off early, came late and refused to understand that laughing at temper tantrums was causing a problem for her child's relationships at day care. This little girl would have a meltdown at every little thing. When I tried to explain that it would take all of us to remedy the situation-she thought her child must need more stimulation! While I felt very sorry for the little girl, it was a relief when she left. We all realized how much tension her screaming had caused when it was no longer with us.

I recently saw the family at a local market-it's been 5 years-this little girl (now almost 8) was still having total meltdowns in public and yes, mom was still laughing!

How to find good day care? It's not really that hard-it's a matter of asking the appropriate questions and then listening to the answers.