How to Gain Respect by Telling the Truth

This is a rather "serious" subject that is not so relevant to everyone's day to day life.

How would you like me to tell you that your pet dog is ugly? Or you'd rather I don't utter a word? Like they say, "if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say it." If we lived like that, the word "truth" wouldn't even exist, would it?

But if I did tell you that your dog is a hideous creature, I'd probably get a tight slap across the face and a demise of a friendship. Now, that's what I get for being honest. Do I deserve that? Do you think it is fair to be slapped in return for telling someone the truth? As far as I know, no one likes the bitter, sad truth. And no one will like me for telling the truth, either.

How much do we like things sugar-coated? We like our ice-cream sweet, we like our cakes sweet and we like our sweets sweet. And that's how it is in most of the movies and books we watch and read. We watch the cool kid kiss the nerd at the end of the movie and our heart is fluttering madly. Or the evil villain gets hit by a train and dies. But how often is it that our lives are like that? Not every good guy wins and not every girl gets her dream guy. Of course, I'm not saying all movies and books are like that. Just why do we have to lie to ourselves by making things seem more palatable when it really isn't? The reason is that no one likes the bitter, sad truth.

So I have clearly stated that honesty is the best policy. Yes, of course it is, but to what extent? Well, my opinion is this:

I would never tell someone their dog is the most hideous creature on earth voluntarily. But if I was asked what I thought of the dog, I will choose my words carefully and avoid saying harsh and hurtful things like "ugly".

I think that "honesty is the best policy" means do not tell lies. You shouldn't feel the need to make someone happy with things that people want to hear because sometimes, people do not know what is best for them.

For example: I want to pursue a career in the Medicine line and I have asked many people what they think. Tom says, "By golly, I think you'd do great with that! You're a really caring person," and Jess says, "Wow, that's really cool! I'm sure you'll do really well with that," and that sounds very encouraging, doesn't it? The truth is I'm terrible when it comes to Biology or Chemistry. Then why did my friends tell me I'd be successful? Because that's what they think I'd like to hear. And if I did become a doctor, I'd probably kill more people than I can cure; I'd become depressed and commit suicide, maybe. But you get what I mean. Lies never helped anyone and I believe that it makes things worse.

Or maybe when it comes to reviewing websites (I only do it on Yoursite.nu), being honest and truthful will definitely help someone improve his/her site. But being downright rude is another thing all together. "Your colors don't match and your tables are all over the place. Your site sucks." That is a very common statement and it never fails to hurt one's feelings. I've always believed that there is good in something that is very bad and vice versa. Nothing is perfect. Thus, I will write, "Your colors aren't very good to the eyes; maybe you should try a lighter color. Your tables are not really aligned properly, here's a good tutorial to help you with that and maybe you should try checking your website in other browsers."

What about movies and books? Those people out there just want to make some cash.

There is a difference. Although this is not applicable to everyone, I'd still like to give a few words of advice: treasure your friends who are honest, supporting and kind because they love you. Fellow peers that continuously sugar-coat things and aren't there when you need them couldn't care less about you.