How Going to College Has Changed My Life.

Being a full-time mom, full-time student, and part-time employee has created several challenges in my life. These challenges brought about lifestyle modifications that will (hopefully) remain with me for the rest of my life. Any time that change comes in to our lives, our initial reaction is to fight this change.

The scariest part about going back to college as a new divorcee and a mother of one had to be the money. I did not know how I was going to be able to pay my bills, child care, tuition, and books, not to mention just the regular bills that I struggled with already on a month-to-month basis. I sat down with paper and made a budget. The hospital that I work with has a weekend option contract in which you work two twelve-hour shifts and get paid for 36 hours and you get all of your full-time benefits. This was what I absolutely had to have in order to go to school.

I learned flexibility. One trait that you must have in order to make all this work is the ability to compromise. I never wanted to work as a nurse's aide. I had said I would never do it. But I did it. I did it for seven long months. That was what I had to do in order to get on weekends so that I could go into the practical nursing program.

I had worked in surgery as a surgical technologist for three years. Surgery had one weekend option team, but they had no openings. After seven months of being a nurse's aide on the post-op/oncology floor, a position opened up in surgery on the weekends and I jumped on it. My experience on the floor did so much to help me in the nursing program. I had to learn how to talk to the patients. It had been so long since I had had to talk to the "customer" that I had actually forgotten how to do it. While working on the floor is not my favorite place to work, it really was for the best that I was able to work there. It allowed me to see that side of nursing and what exactly goes on after we have done our part in surgery.

I learned to save money. Again, being a single mom, I had to learn to stick to a strict budget. I became a master of saving money. Everyone is different and the key is to sit down and figure necessities and nonnecessities. Once I figured out what I could and could not live without, I practically had it made. The practical nursing program was hard. We lived paycheck-to-paycheck. I had received a Pell grant to pay for part of my tuition and books. The rest of the tuition as well as the other supplies (uniforms, equipment, supplies, gas, meals, etc.) was dependent on my income. During the RN program, I got a scholarship from the hospital that I worked with, I received a Pell grant, and I took out a student loan. I was determined not to have to live under that added pressure of not enough money this year as I did in the practical nursing program.

There are many options that you can try in order to get more money. There are tons of scholarships that you can apply for. If you are lucky and search hard enough, you might even find a program that forgives student loans. When I first went through the surgical technology (ST) program in 2000, Arkansas was so short-staffed with STs, that for every year that you worked as a ST in Arkansas, you could get $2,500 knocked off of your student loan. That was a pretty good deal.

I learned how to manage my time more effectively. I had pharm questions as well as online test due by 9:00 a.m. Tuesday, a one-hundred-question growth and development module due on Wednesday, and a group project due on Thursday. My son had taekwondo on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays every week. I worked twelve hours a day on the weekends. When was I supposed to do all this homework and study for tests too? When you have so much going on, you have to make the time. I would do homework while waiting in the car line to pick my son up from school. While waiting for taekwondo, as well as during, I did homework. You can imagine that this takes a high level of commitment by both adult and child. I had to make sure that my son had something to do to occupy him while I did all this.

Family time is a necessity. I sat aside one evening a week to have quality time with my son. We did whatever he wanted. If he wanted to go out to eat at his favorite pizza place, we did. If he wanted to watch a movie and/or chess and/or play video games together, then we did. This is just something that has to be done.

I learned more responsibility. Because of the prioritization that I had to learn, it caused me to cut down that weekly Friday night get-together with friends to maybe every second or third weekend. It also caused me to accept that I could not eat out for lunch every day and maybe I didn't really need that new shirt right this very minute.

I gained self-esteem. Knowing that I have accomplished everything that I have accomplished when I had all the challenges working against me, gives me an overwhelming sense of pride. It empowered me. Because I achieved this goal, it gave me the encouragement to try new things. I went out and bought that beginner's home repair book and began fixing things around the house that needed to be fixed. I had always been told that I could not do that kind of stuff before. Each new thing that I was able to do led me try more new things. On and on until now I am not afraid to try something new.

All in all, going back to college and done a number of things to help me. It increased my self-esteem and gave me a sense of self-empowerment. It taught me discipline, responsibility, time and money management and flexibility. Plus, it has made me an example for my son to live by.