How to Be a Good Friend

Good friends are not always easy to come by. A person we thought was a good friend many end up deceiving us or abusing our good nature. Some people just shun people because they do not want to get close enough to them to be hurt. But is this the best option? Can we live without friends?

A good friend can be trusted

There is no doubt about it, a good friend can always be trusted. We can leave money lying around in their presence without worrying that it will go walk about and we know that we can trust them not to betray a confidence. It is easy to tell if a friend has betrayed our confidence, because a well kept secret suddenly becomes common knowledge. Friends who do such things are not real friends. A real friend is one who does not have to look over his shoulder whenever he talks about another friend. If you have this tendency, try to look at it this way. Whenever you talk about another friend, are you afraid that what you have said about them would be unacceptable if they were standing in front of you? If you would not say it to their face, then do not say it at all. I avoid this tendency by talking about friends in a positive light if I am not around them, so that if word got back to them I would be proud of what I had said, rather than ashamed of it.

A good friend is not clingy

Have you ever had a friend who tried to spend all their time with you and never left you alone? Friends who do this can feel insecure about themselves. But they can also be very draining and make it difficult for their friend to function normally. So think about whether you need to go round your friend's house every day and spend hours at a time with them. Call your friend before you go round and see if they would like the company. People need time to themselves to relax and get on with other things too, rather than spending all their time socializing. A good friend will know when to back off and leave their friend alone and mix with other friends too.

Is not jealous

Some people can become quite jealous if their friend has another group of friends besides them. There is no need to feel this way. Just because they have other friends it does not mean that they cannot still be your friend. Friendships can expand to include many other people, the same as love expands in a family to include the spouse and children. Try to make other friends too, so that you do not spend every moment with the same friend.

Is honest

Good friends do not tell you what you want to hear. They tell you the truth. They will be kind in the way they speak to you if your opinions differ, but they will also give needed counsel when it is required. So if you ask "does this skirt look too short on me?" they will tell you the truth, rather than let you humiliate yourself with a skirt that does not suit you at all. It is not easy to be upfront about certain issues, but doing this will spare your feelings in the long run.

A good friend is there to see you through troubled times

Someone who is a mere acquaintance will disappear into the background whenever a crisis looms and will not appreciate a late night phone call if you need help. But a true friend will be there to pick up the pieces whenever you have to deal with bereavement or some other kind of loss. They will not need to be asked in advance if they can help. They will be the ones offering the help straightaway and doing all they can to relive the pain.

A good friend will have fun with you

What is a friend if it is not someone with whom you can go out with and have fun with you? They will go on trips with you, tag along when you go shopping, help you pick out clothes, attend sporting events with you and even go away with you for a fun filled weekend break. A good friend will laugh with you, rather than at you!

A good friend encompasses many other different aspects. But mainly, they can be relied upon for support and comfort during difficult times and fun and laughter during the good times. Some people are just not true friends. They just want to associate with you when the times are good, but when they are bad, they will usually disappear.