How to Grow a Thick Beard like Brian Wilson

Brian Wilson is the charismatic closer for the World Champion San Francisco Giants of the MLB. He has the manliest facial hair of any athlete in the world. Mere mortals like yourself actually do have the ability to grow an impressive mane, but it may not be as prominent as Mr. Wilson's

Grow a thick beard: cutting is a no-no.
Cutting your stubble doesn't make the hair on your face come in thicker. A razor only removes hair at the surface. To promote extra hair growth, you would need some sort of magic infused blade, that also planted Rogaine seeds in your pores. Such a razor doesn't exist(or at least, that's what the government would have you believe...)

I know everyone was told otherwise growing up, but it was only an urban legend. Much like how masturbation causes hair to grow out of a guys palms was a story that makes no sense what so ever, cutting hair at the surface of the skin doesn't make your non-hair producing pores sprout like wild oats.

Grow a thick beard: Raise testosterone.
If you want a manly beard like a lumberjack, you're gonna need to become one in certain ways. why do ladies have the ability to grow facial hair like us guys do? Because some of them produce more testosterone than normal. You have more than a few options when it comes to raising yours.

Example: You can either hang out with the bearded lady at the circus, and mimic whatever she does in her free time. Or, try and lose that beer gut and matching set of bosoms you've been caring around with you. Lugging around extra body fat(around 30% or more) actually raises estrogen levels in the body, and lowers your testosterone. so you better hit the gym if you don't want a manly women laughing at your naked face region.

Grow a thick beard: Give it time.
Wait about 5 or 6 weeks to see if you are able to grow a thick beard. Don't be deterred by any bald or thin spots you man see early on. It's normal. You're facial hair isn't going to come in uniformly, it's more of a casual affair. The chin and bottom of the cheek bones are the likely areas that will be a little bare the first couple of weeks.

After a month and a half, you should see a respectable amount of growth(depending on your testosterone levels, results may vary). It is at this time you can begin to experiment with grooming your new face sweater. Friendly mutton chops, the chin curtain, old Dutch, spade and the Verdy are just a handful of options you have to work with. If your lip coat is the only thing that came in nicely, I suggest trying to bring back the Fu Manchu, or even the Imperial mustache. No need to shave everything off, and destroy a possible masterpiece.