How to Handle Being Rejected by a Woman

It requires long periods of intense pressure and heat for a natural diamond to be formed. Likewise it will take patience and adversity before you will achieve your ultimate potential with women. It is through negative experiences that we learn life's greatest lessons. You negative experiences with women will only help you further in your knowledge of what works and what does not in the dating world.

Handling rejection is a big part of being successful with women. Even the best of men receive rejection from women. What separates the winners from the failures is whether or not they learned the true reasons why they were rejected. The men who learn from their mistakes go on to bigger and better things. What can you learn from the woman who turned you down? Is there something you said, or did, or was it something completely out of your hands?

While I mentioned in the first chapter that men should have a strong sense of self-efficacy, there will come points in life where the situation is out of the mans control. The reasons for this are plentiful. Sometimes the woman whom you decide to approach is already in a satisfying relationship. She may be lesbian. She may be having a bad day and is not open to anyone's approach, men or women.

However, you should not see these events as obstacles. They are in fact learning experiences. Each woman whom you approach moves you one step closer to succeeding with the woman of your dreams. You can look at the situation from a scientific point of view. Most scientists do not shoot themselves down when one of their experiments goes awry. They take note of what transpired and move on to the next experiment. You can use this same mindset when you are approaching women. Of course you will be you genuine self but you will not be acting as though her response will make or break you.

There is another advantage to looking at your experiences from an objective point of view. When you are objective you can think more clearly and you appear more calm to those around you. If you act as if her response has the possibility of shattering your self-image then you will present a nervous appearance which will be even more likely to make your fears come true.

The next thing you will want to do is think about it as a numbers game. Of course you will not be thinking of women as numbers like cattle on a field. But I'm pointing this out so you can get a quantifiable view of the dating field. The dating world is a numbers game whether people realize it or not. The more women that a man has the chance of meeting and greeting the wider the selection he has to choose from. Men who only approach a limited number of women likewise have a limited selection.

Moreover, the more women the ambitions man has contact with the more of a chance that he will meet women who are attracted to him. The less ambitions man actually limits the number of women whom will find himself attractive. Knowing these facts, you should approach as many women as possible. Of course, this will not be literally true as some women may be with their husbands or some women may be distracted by their activities, but it does mean that you can approach the single women that you did not normally consider talking to at the grocery store. It means that you can engage more women on campus that you normally talk to.

Next, what you will want to do is learn from other men's success and failures with women. The next time you go to a singles hotspot or a night club pay close attention to the pickup techniques of the men around you then focus on their results. This method of observation can save you the pain you would experience yourself in going up to every woman at the club. The dating world consists of the behavior of men and women interacting with each other. To get the widest perspective you will have to learn about men and male behavior and the outcomes of such behavior. Then apply the successful behavior to your approach and erase the negative.

What is the difference in the approach between the men who are successful with women and those who are not? What do they say? How do they stand? What are they wearing? All of these questions will give you clues to what works and what does not. What did you learn about the women who rebuffed your advances? Did they put things lightly or harshly?

Remember, it is not your experiences which affection your emotions. It is the way that you react that counts. You have total control over how you can perceive your life events. No two people have the same perspective. What one person sees as a failure, another person may see as an opportunity. Furthermore, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Someone who you think is unattractive may be attractive to another man. Likewise, you may perceive a woman's attitude differently than the man next to you. Your job is to recognize patterns in your relationships with women. What is the underlying current running through your experiences with women? It is important to have the conviction that you have complete control over your life. If we don't believe that we have complete control over our lives then who are we giving that control to?

Women who are overtly harsh on you after you make your approach, likely are behaving that way because of negative experiences they had in their past. Maybe, the last man who hit on her would not take no for an answer or maybe she has low self-esteem and enjoys shooting down men, or she's not interested and does not know how to put it lightly.

Everyone interprets events differently. Some people view extreme sports such as skydiving to be extremely terrifying, while others find it to be fun and exhilarating. In regards to approaching women, some men find it impossible to approach women, while other men relish in the challenge. It is the way you frame your experiences that counts.