How to Handle Your Mother-in-Law

Mothers-in-law are notorious for being rude and difficult with their daughters-in-law in particular. The recent movie, Monster in Law, showed an extreme example of this. While most mothers-in-law aren't this bad, there are a few tips to help you deal with yours.

The first thing is to accept that you will never be cherished! After all, you stole her baby boy and that is an unforgivable sin, one that you will understand far better when you have children of your own! Despite this, it is up to you and your husband to let your mother-in-law know that he now has two women in his life, both of whom are important to him.

If you don't have your husband's support, you are going to have a much harder time dealing with the problems you face. You certainly can't expect him to go completely against his mother, most men just won't, but you can explain that you expect him to back you up on certain things that the two of you agree on. For example, if you have both decided that it is best to wait two years to start a family, don't let him weasel out when his mother insists that you ought to start now. If he says something like, "well, (your name here) wants to build her career before having kids", take him aside and remind him that it was a mutual decision.

Living close to your mother-in-law can cause even more problems, especially if she insists that your husband visit daily. You might feel that you are competing for his attention, and you are. However, fighting with either of them is not a good way to go. Your husband will feel torn and your mother-in-law will feel victorious for having riled you! Instead, if you know when your guy will not be coming home, plan something fun on your own. Go out with friends or have a stay-in pizza party, or rent some movies that you have been meaning to see, but your husband wouldn't be caught dead watching.

In this case, treating others as you wish to be treated is the best policy. While your mother-in-law probably won't do anything outright, she might make lots of little snide remarks behind your back or conveniently "forget" things that are important for you. Instead of doing the same back to her, treat her with respect (not love, just respect!) and try to remember that if it weren't for her, your dear husband would never have arrived in the world!