How to Head Off Roommate Problems in College

Moving day for college freshmen is an exciting time (getting away from parents) but it has a number of anxious moments. Do you have enough money to get dorm and class necessities? Where is your first class? What is your major going to be? From my experience, however, the greatest (and most unexpected) problem is the clash of personalities that can take place when two roommates meet each other. This is understandable, given the fast pace from living with mom and dad to living with a stranger in a building surrounded by other strangers. However, before going to the RA or trying to figure out a way to move to a new room, there are some very practical tips that will let any student prevent any unwanted roommate drama.

The first day is an important time in the new roommates' relationship and before they start to party up with others in the dorm, roommates need to sit down and come up with ground rules for their dorm room. Common lists include setting up a rough cleaning schedule (nothing too strict), a system for keeping quiet study time separated from time with friends in the room, and sharing whatever shopping or grocery duties that may be needed to supplement dorm meal plans. As well, setting up such a list can really help roommates get to know each other and learn each other's boundaries. While this may seem to be a small thing, the school year brings work, class, and outside activities that don't allow a lot of serious conversation time between roommates.

If problems do arise despite this first effort at organization, there is no need to fret or worry that the relationship is irreconcilable. Go to your hall fellow or resident assistant (or the most direct contact to your Residence Life department) with your roommate and simply talk out the situation. Typically, an informal discussion with the resident assistant mediating can provide a common sense solution to any problems. However, the most important thing to understand for those new to the residence hall environment is that developing a relationship with the resident assistant enhances the overall living experience in that crucial freshman year.

New students need to approach living in the dorms like a marathon, not a sprint. Getting into fights with roommates may seem to relieve tension in the short term but you still have to live with that person after the fight is over. Common sense and patience are virtues that are as important as anything learned in the classroom and talking it out with a roommate, no matter how difficult it may be, is a great learning experience.