How to Help Children Stop Overreacting

As toddlers children really don't overreact. To them it really is the end of the world when they are told no or when a toy breaks. As toddlers grow into preschool age children their reactions in such situations are calmer. Problem solving techniques are used rather than tears. Children ages five and up still sometimes lay on the drama though, overreacting over the situations instead of calmly working through them.

As children grow physically they are also growing intellectually, and emotionally. If a two year old is using a pencil and the lead breaks they likely will cry. However, if a ten year old is using a pencil and the lead breaks they should know to simply go and sharpen the pencil. Say the ten year old doesn't do that. Instead he or she gets angry, or upset and throws the pencil down calling it "stupid". This is overreacting. It is also being dramatic. These actions are not a necessary part of solving the problem of a broken pencil lead.

There are many ways that parents can help to end the drama and overreaction. One surefire way is to catch your child in the act of being dramatic, or of overreacting. Right at that moment when your child throws down the pencil take action. The first thing to say is "That reaction was not acceptable or appropriate."

Letting your child know that getting angry or upset in a situation is not okay will help them to not do it. They must understand that overreacting or being dramatic is not going to solve their problems. The child must also understand that it is a behavior that won't be considered acceptable by you, the parent, or by the teachers at school.

The next thing to do is to encourage the child to problem solve. Communicate with your child to calm them. Start by saying something to the effect of "I see that your pencil lead has broken. What can we do about that?" This let's the child know that you will help them, and that something can be done about it. It's always good to add in comments like "This is a problem, yes, but there's no need to be upset. All problems have solutions." This get's your child focused on solving the problem rather than on acting out about it.

Offer your child suggestions, or ask them what could be done to make the situation better. "What could you do to fix that pencil?" The child will likely say "Sharpen it." Or, offer a suggestion. "You could sharpen your pencil, or get another one." This directs the child to taking steps to solve the problem at hand.

Sometimes drama and overreaction occur during discipline. Your child was asked to clean their room and they don't want to. They overreact, and lay on the drama when you ask them to do it anyway. Once again, your communication is key. Let your child know that refusing to do a task in unacceptable, and that their behavior will not be tolerated. If the task isn't started and the drama continues take action. Letting it slide will only increase the chances of it happening again. Use your discipline method. Time out is a good one. If you give in and let them off of the hook because you don't want to hear or see them overreacting anymore you are actually encouraging the drama.

Children act in these ways to express things. They are sometimes expressing that they are frustrated, other times they are simply expressing that they don't want to do whatever. Regardless of what the child is trying to express the way they are doing it should not be accepted. Communicate with them about other ways that they can handle situations. Ask them to problem solve or offer suggestions. When you take the time to work with your child they will work with you. If you consistently do this, and always refuse to give in your child will learn that the drama and overreacting gets them nowhere. It will stop. They will only choose to use these behaviors if they suit them, and get them what they want. Thanks for reading and take care!