How to Help Someone with Dissociative Identity Disorder

Dissociative identity disorder (DID) used to be known as Multiple Personality Disorder. It is a psychological condition in which a person has two or more distinct personality states, sometimes called "alters." DID is most often caused by severe early childhood abuse. Therefore people with DID often have post-traumatic stress disorder, as well. In addition, people with DID often experience depression, anxiety, sleep problems, and eating disorders, although not all people with DID experience all of these problems.

There are a number of things you can do to help and support a loved one with DID.

Learn all you can about DID. There are some good books on the subject, including "First Personal Plural" by Cameron West and "Amongst Ourselves" by Tracy Alderman and Karen Marshall. There are also some good websites were you can get information, like www.mosaicminds.org.

A person with DID needs professional help. While there is much that you can do as a friend or family member to help and support a person with DID, they still need professional help. You can help someone with DID by helping them locate a therapist who is trained and experienced in treating the condition. Encourage your loved one to attend therapy appointments regularly.

Attend a therapy appointment with your loved one, if he or she is agreeable to that. The therapist can give you some more information about DID and help you find ways to support your loved one.

In addition to encouraging your loved one to seek professional help, encourage him or her to join a support group for people with DID. Getting support from others with the same condition can be very helpful.

Be willing simply to listen if your loved one wants to talk. Listen without interrupting and without judging. You don't need to give advice or try to solve your loved one's problems. Just listening is enough.

Be aware that your loved one with DID may "switch," that is, other alters may come out at times. These alters may talk and act differently than how your loved one usually talks and acts. They may not know who you are. They may not know things your loved ones knows. Introduce yourself if they don't know you, and explain where you are and what's going on. Reassure them if they are frightened.

Be especially sensitive to child alters. When a child alter is out, your loved one may speak and act like a child. Child alters may be fearful, for instance, they may be afraid of the dark. They may not realize that they are now in an adult body. Speak to them the way you would speak to a child, and reassure them if they are frightened. They may like you to read them a children's book, or they may like to color a picture with you.

Encourage your loved one to work on developing communication and cooperation among their alters. Keeping a journal is often helpful. Help your loved one work out compromises between alters who want different things. For instance, a child alter may want to stay home and play instead of going to work. A compromise can often be worked out whereby the adult goes to work and then after work, the child alter is given time to come out and play.

Be alert to signs that your loved one might be suicidal. Not everyone with DID is suicidal, but it is not uncommon for someone with DID, PTSD, and/or depression to go through times when they are suicidal. If you think your loved one might be suicidal, get them professional help immediately. If their therapist is not available, you can just go to the nearest emergency room.