How to Help Your Toddler Sleep

We co-slept with our babies. Like Dr. William Sears, we thought it would be good for their growth and development, and that it's the easiest way for both parents and babies to get enough sleep! But there comes a time when parents need the child out of their bed, often during the toddler years.

But the toddler isn't too sure about this. "Sleep by myself? In the dark? What happens when I wake up in the middle of the night?"

And so the child ends up in your bed again, night after night. Or, you end up in his or her room, trying to soothe the child back to sleep. Or, if you think it's best, you end up letting your son or daughter cry until he or she falls asleep. However, no one would deny that this is not the ideal way for a child to fall asleep.

After three kids, we've developed several methods and options of our own for helping a toddler sleep.

Establish a Bedtime Routine

You need a positive routine that lands your child in her or his own bed. Reading aloud, singing and/or listening to recorded music are all good things to include. Tuck your child in and sit with him or her for a little while. At first, you may even sit there until the toddler drifts off. Later, you might leave the room while your toddler's awake, saying, "I'll come back and check on you in a few minutes." And then do come back and check, but don't stay. Eventually, you'll be able to just say good night and walk away.

Be consistent

If your child wakes in the middle of the night and comes to you, take him or her back to bed. You might have to do this several times at first, but it will be worth it in the long run. You don't have to leave your toddler there to cry, though. Respond appropriately and lovingly as needed.

Offer an alternative

If your child continues to get up during the night, put a small sleeping bag or a thick blanket on the floor near your bed. Tell him or her to lie down there if needed. That way, your toddler can choose to be near you if necessary, but you'll be able to sleep.

Offer incentives

This works best with older toddlers or preschoolers, but you can set up a star chart. Give your child a star for each night slept in his or her own bed. Give a bigger reward (candy, a book, a special outing) for getting five stars.

And finally, be assured that your child will sleep on his or her own eventually. They all grow into it; I promise!

Sources:

Dr. William Sears, "Co-sleeping: Yes, No, Sometimes?", AskDrSears.com.