How to Hide Your Smoking Habit and Not Smell like Smoke

I am a woman who is perpetually quitting smoking, starting secretly, and quitting again. It is not easy to be a secret smoker, and I don't know how long one can expect to get away with hiding it. But I will share some of the things I have tried. The hope is that most won't notice, and those who do will either have doubts or feel sorry for you, and will be reluctant to lecture you about your disgusting habit.

Try not to smoke in enclosed spaces.

Don't smoke in your home - everything you own, including all of your clothes, will smell like cigarettes.

Try not to smoke in your car. If you must, open one window, hold the cigarette out of the window as much as possible, and try to blow the smoke out of the car when you exhale.

Don't smoke in bars, restaurants, parks, parking lots, etc. that might be frequented by people you know.

When you take breaks at work, don't go to the "regular" smoking area. Yes, you might have to hide in some depressing corner by the garbage cans.

Smoke downwind if possible.

After a cigarette, wash your hands, put on scented lotion, and chew gum.

Winter coats always seem to stink badly of cigarettes. At home, when you go out for a smoke in cold weather, wear a robe or a jacket that is different from the one you wear every day or to work. If possible, keep a jacket or fleece in your car to put on if you have to smoke on your way to meet people you are hiding your habit from. Ideally, you can step out of the car, put the jacket on, have your smoke, wash your hands or use hand sanitizer and lotion, then leave the jacket in the car and hopefully your clothes won't smell too much like smoke. Of course, you can do this if you smoke in the car as well.

Carry regular gum, and nicotine gum if necessary, so that you can occupy yourself and satisfy nicotine cravings when it is impossible for you to sneak away.

Keep cigarettes and lighters in a zippered pocket of your purse, so they are not accidentally dropped in front of someone or left out in view.