How to Get Your Infant to Sleep Through the Night

You may be bleary eyed and tired, you may feel stressed each evening when your baby is cranky and you may be trying every trick you can think of to get them to fall asleep. Teaching your baby to put themselves to sleep is an essential part of your peace and of their ability to sleep through the night.

You may be able to relate to my early days as a new mommy. This was my first baby. I remember proudly explaining to my pediatrician that oh, yes, my adorable, wonderful baby definitely slept through the night. Oh, doctor, I just rock him back and forth in my arms and then bounce him in a rhythmic pattern that must be copied by everyone who desires to put him to sleep. Sure enough in about ten minutes he falls asleep and I tiptoe to his crib and lay him down and quietly tip-toe backwards. I then received my first rebuke as a Mother. The doctor firmly said, Do not do that. Instead, lay him down awake and let him go to sleep. Wow, what a news flash that was for me. What made me accept what he said as truth? The fact that he was a doctor? Maybe. The fact that he had been my pediatrician when I was a child? Not really. I accepted what he said and made the necessary changes because he threatened me with a stark reality. He went on to say that if my beautiful baby did not learn to put himself to sleep now that he would not be able to put himself to sleep as a five or six year old child. He explained that going to sleep on his own was a skill that he needed for life.

As the pediatrician spoke, a picture of my friend's five year old flashed in my mind. I instantly recalled the late nights that the child would still be up bouncing and playing past 11:00pm because her Mommy was still up. I did not want to live the cycle that I had observed in their lives. I had assumed the child was spoiled and that was why she insisted on waiting for her Mommy to rub her back and sing to her and tell her stories until both of them were exhausted. I was shocked to learn that perhaps it was instead because she had never been given the opportunity to learn the skill of putting herself to sleep. I instantly determined to teach my baby this skill. Within a few short nights of following the pediatricians instructions to lay him down awake, my baby did indeed learn to lay down quietly and go to sleep on his own. And I loved it. How can you do the same? There are three basic steps that I will bring you and your child success from babyhood to teen years.

Step number one: prepare baby for bed or nap with this basic routine: feed bottle, change diaper, sing a song, tell the baby its night-night. These are all preparatory actions. They insure that the baby's tummy is satisfied, that their bottom is clean and dry, and the song creates a bonding time. Telling the baby that it is night night is letting the baby know what to expect.

Step number two: place the baby in the crib. The crib is to be empty of toys. The baby can have a pacifier if you would like or a soft, safety appropriate blanket . However, there should be no stimuli in the crib. By this I specifically mean there should be no musical toys, hanging crib ABC learning games, etc. These toys have their place in a play pen but not in a place of sleep. As you lay the baby in the crib keep words simple and to a minimum. Baby is prepared and ready for sleep. Turn and leave the room. Whatever routine you begin now will become a habit so decide now if you will teach them to sleep with or without a night light, with the door open or shut. You can also decide if you want to quietly play music.

Step three: let the baby go to sleep. The baby may fuss for a few minutes. Let the baby fuss. He/she is safe, clean and fed. If the baby fusses loudly for five minutes go in and lay the baby back down if standing and rub their back and peacefully say goodnight. Walk out. If the baby cries for ten more minutes go in and very briefly rub their back, say goodnight and walk out. Continue to follow this pattern. You may learn that your baby fusses for a minute or two each time. You may find that after a few nights/nap times they lay quietly and go to sleep without crying at all.

I followed this formula with my first baby at about seven months of age and it was like a dream come true. I never had to fuss and fight over bed time. I followed this pattern each night and that pattern was something that he enjoyed. When he was five and I had company I would simply excuse myself for 15 minutes and prepare him and lay him down for bed. I have applied this pattern to my newborn babies as well. When they awoke to eat. I would get up and follow this routine. Feeding, change of diaper, very quiet song, and lay them down while they were still awake. This pattern insured that they were learning to put themselves to sleep and that they were not soiled or wet. They each slept four hours between feedings until the feedings stretched longer and longer. They completely slept through the night by six weeks of age using this pattern. My definition of sleeping through the night: They were laid down awake and went to sleep and did not stir or cry for a feeding for eight hours or more. Getting your baby to sleep through the night will work best if you set up a plan and stick to it. Remember, cats were once cute kittens and puppies soon grow into dogs. Babies soon grow into children and little boys and girls are much better behaved and learn far better when they have learned the skills needed for proper rest and sleep. Happy parenting.