How to Invent Your Own Religion?

Indeed, before the advent of the Industrial Revolution, much of what was deemed "truth" was actually a mish-mash of religious doctrines being spouted as absolute morals and truths by the major religions in Europe, Asia and the rest of the Old World.

Things are much different now, of course. We now know for sure the Earth isn't flat, and that the planets and the Sun don't exactly revolve around the Earth, thanks to the wealth of scientific knowledge that is available to us through education and mass media.

Given the amount of scientific data today, is it possible, then, for someone with the enigma, posse, and charisma to form a whole new religion?

From the fatalistic fantasies of Jim Jones and David Koresh, to the love-inspired cults of Sai Baba, the idea that religious movements can be formed in this day and age isn't really unfathomable.

So just how does one exactly create and sustain a religion/cult?

1. WRITE A HOLY BOOK

The world's major religions need them. From the ancient Jewish torah to the Muslim Quran, the writing of holy books is of utmost importance to any religion. Failure to do so will result in a slow death of your newly-fledged religion.

A holy book will chart the destiny of your new cult. Your followers will refer to your holy book for their moments of inspiration, as well as their daily indoctrination.

When writing a holy book, here are some pointers you may want to take note of:

i. Write in a bizarre, obscure manner: When writing a holy book, you should write it in a ambiguous, vague manner. Now you may ask, why would anyone want to read something when they can't really comprehend it?

By writing vaguely, you incite interest amongst your members, since they will spend precious hours of their time decoding your "words of wisdom". In the course of time, you will be able to release your interpretations at your own pace and time, all the while toying with the emotions of your followers.

The "you are taking the verses out of context" excuse can be also deployed when detractors question the holy book.

ii. Erect a God/ Gods: Now this is a rather knotty issue. While it is possible that you can bestow yourself the role of God (or God's son, or a demi-God), it would not be advisable, because when one claims Godhood, he or she must be capable of performing miracles to wow the followers. Of course, you can try learning magic tricks, but not everyone can make the Statue of Liberty disappear. Not to mention the bad press you may receive.

A easier and much more efficient option, though, will be for you to lay claim as a Prophet, or some messenger from God. That way, you can claim exclusive access to a imagined deity, without the hassle of performing street magic to the masses.

As for the God in question, you can name a few Gods, although monotheism does have a higher success rate. Besides, monotheism is easier on the human brain (The presence of too many Gods will befuddle your flock).

iii. Write and tabulate a set of rules/commandments:

When writing the holy book, ensure that you drop down a list of wrongdoings, or sins. Since this is a new religion, prohibitions against certain, other-wise crimeless habits (e.g: eating pork, masturbating) can be deemed as grave abominations. These rules shall serve as the cornerstones for your fledging cult.

In addition to writing the holy book, you may want to scribble down a set of golden rules into a tablet, or anything that is hardy and cannot be simply bleached away in a washing machine.

iv. Use of parables/ story-telling sessions: The use of parables and moral Para-phases will further endear you to your followers. After all, a holy book cannot sustain a prolonged interest based on a set of moral conducts, with little or nothing else in between.

When writing parables, try to write them imbue subliminal messages into them, so as to brainwash them as completely as possible. This will help to reduce the number of backsliders who will eventually leave your little cult/religion.

When passing off your fairy tales as "actual, historical" facts, remember to use real-time locations, countries and influential people. That will make them look authentic to the followers.

v. Hell/Heaven: Let's face it: Every major religion requires a hell and a heaven. The "carrot and stick" theory is a time-proven method, used to prevent the faithful from ever leaving their flock. Not that it works every time, but it does scare the wits out of the majority of your flock. After all, who wouldn't want to live in heaven, and avoid a human barbeque at the same time?

vi. Appoint a fictitious Devil: This one is self-explanatory. The Devil, being the evil guy, is a handy tool when it comes to explain inexplicable questions. E.g:"Prophet, Mr X has been praying constantly, why is it that he was killed by lightning?" The irrational position you should take would be, of course, to vilify the poor sod: "Oh, he had a evil thought at that point, as he couldn't resist the temptation of the Devil, and God had to punish him."

The Devil is synonymous with hell. It adds credibility to the carrot-and-stick bull, and it is important for you to ensure that the Devil plays an equal role with your God.

viii. Inciting hatred: Ensure that you insert a few pet hatreds along the way. The essence of religion is the "We are right, you are wrong, and you are going to hell" mentality. Eligible groups of choice will be gays, atheists, infidels and pagans.

2. RECRUITING DISCIPLES

Upon completing your holy book, you will be well placed to seek out your flock. It is unlikely that you will be able to build your religion on your own. Choose a set of disciples amongst the friends you can trust as confidantes, and you will be on your own merry way.

These "disciples" are actually your partners-in-crime, therefore you must treat them with utmost respect. Defections from your disciples will usually result in a early death of your cult. These are the guys who will offer second-hand testimony (You, the original founder, will have first-hand access to your imagined deity) to the rest of your flock, and will therefore have access to the inner workings of your budding cult. Besides, with their help, you will become more prominent, and hence well-placed to reach out to the "unsaved" masses.

Best of all, you can include the roles of your disciples to your holy book, just to add a touch of mystique to your cult.

Arm your disciples with your newly written religious book (Make sure these books come in extravagant leatherback), and set them out for recruitment.

3. COLLECTING TITHES

Money, of course, should be the prime motivator: In fact, it would be the chief reason why one would go through the hassles of organizing and breeding a religion.

Depending on your motives and personal greed, the amount of tithe you would wish to exact from your flock will be directly proportional to their paychecks. While it is perfectly fine to demand a certain portion of their wages as a minimum tithe, aggressive demands may alienate certain sections of your flock and force them to leave. Leverage your stock, and you may be well on your way to building a thriving, financially lucrative cult.