How to Keep a Relationship Strong During Deployment

When a soldier is deployed, it becomes harder to keep a relationship strong. Months without seeing the one you love can turn you into an emotional wreck. However, there are many things you can do to connect even though you can't be physically with each other.

Send small presents and letters. When you can't talk, write down what you want to say and send it along. Even if you end up talking in the meantime, send the letter anyhow. Send cards for every occasion. I even sent my soldier a Halloween card that said, "Halloween without you... it sucks." I told him how much I wanted to be his zombie princess. He loved it! Send your soldier things he likes that he can't get where he is deployed. If you're a soldier, send presents that can't be purchased back in the US. My guy sent me the prettiest ring from Iraq he found at a bazaar. I loved it!

Send a series of small notes. Inside an envelope, simply write, "Reasons why I love you #1: You look sexy in your uniform." Repeat. Send one every week.

Send photos. Don't just send digital photos. Send photos that can be carried around. My soldier sent me a photo keychain he filled with pictures of him. One slide had a heart on it. It was the sweetest thing and I carried it with me until he got home.

Send clothes that smell like you. Wear them around for a few days. Don't sleep in them because you want them to smell good. But, take a t-shirt or something with your scent and send it. Even a pillowcase is good. A soldier I knew slept with a teddy bear for weeks just so it would smell like him and he could send it back to his wife. I thought that was sweet.

Life will be different without your soldier. Learn to be independent and keep conversations upbeat. Talk about silly things when you talk on the phone rather than being sad or talking about problems. Don't count down the days.

If your soldier has access to the internet, play games together online when you can or talk via webcam. Sacrifice some sleep to get up early or stay up late to spend time online together.

Take a video of yourself and send it along. Be silly. Do things that will make him smile. My guy thought it was great I sent him a video of me making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while talking about nothing to him. You can do everyday things or make a silly video of you lip synching to some crazy song like Bohemian Rhapsody. Do an impression of his favorite celebrity.

When you send him packages, leave little notes he won't find right away. Send him a magazine and draw hearts on the corners or write little love notes on random pages. Open the box of toothpaste and slip a small note in there. He'll be happy to "randomly" hear from you.